Two days ago, I asked Nigerians to share what would happen if Nigeria hosted the Olympics and just as I expected, they did not disappoint. Not only did they understand the assignment, they spiral-binded the whole thing and submitted a day in advance. Taking a page from their assignment, I have decided to compile it […]
Like every other thing that comes from Nigeria, your international passport just wants to travel out, enjoy life and flex on the gram but you no get money. *insert clown emoji* So here is everything your international passport wants to say to you. It’s another frustrating day in Buhari’s country. Rain water has entered your […]
What’s not to love about ATMs? If you just ignore the long queues, bad network, and occasional swallowing of cards, ATMs are a lifesaver. They do their jobs and let you go about your day. But what if you were stuck in a parallel universe where ATMs could speak? It’s 5 a.m. A young man […]
GPS technology is very simple. You input a location, and it gets you to where you need to be. Clear cut and No drama. Except when the GPS is voiced by your Nigerian mother. Heavy sigh. It’s morning and a guy, casually dressed, steps into his Mercedes Benz and turns on the ignition. As the […]
Nigerians parents would rather walk into a crocodile-infested river than spend two minutes in a room with a cat. You now bring a woman, who claims to be a cat, to meet your parents? Disaster. On this episode of #JustImagine, Catwoman meets her Nigerian in-laws and things get very weird. There is a small crowd […]
When you take a closer look, Romeo and Juliet is a classic Nigerian story. Boy meets Girl. They fall in love. But their parents refuse to agree to a union due to irreconcilable differences. Sounds familiar? The only part of this story that doesn’t quite gel is the dying part. Nigerian men will say they’d […]
Nigerians in A Quiet Place? LMAO. They wouldn’t last two minutes. For the people who haven’t seen the movie – A Quiet Place, the title is really all there is to it. It takes place in a post-apocalyptic world where sounds attract blood hungry monsters. So if you are doing anything and you make a […]
If I had a kobo for every time I heard the phrase, “Nigeria brings out the beast in people,” my Canada relocation funds would be complete, and I’d be shaking my ass on a yacht with Bill Gates. But all Nigeria gives is frustration. Now, imagine we had a superhero who turns into a beast […]
Take Storm and drop her in a country that almost crumbles at the slightest sign of rain.
On this episode of Just Imagine, James Bond comes to Nigeria and it’s as messy as you’d imagine.
If God gave Nigerian parents clay to make the perfect daughter, they’d mould a God-fearing woman with six children and a husband she diligently submits to. Now, imagine God ignores their request and, instead, sends them a daughter who isn’t particularly interested in marriage and just wants to fight men all day. Chaos. Well, because […]
La Casa De Papel, or Money Heist as it is famously called, was such a fan favorite in Nigeria because, other than the brilliant storyline, one heist or the other happens every day in this country. The economy is a mess, the government wants to double fuel price, and crypto is refusing to get up. […]
Spiderman has been seen doing a ton of questionable things on the TL lately — dancing at parties for food, twerking for coins and passing out at nightclubs. We can’t tell if it’s the economy or he took the wrong covid vaccine, but something is seriously wrong with that man. So, inspired by these shenanigans, […]
Twitter went berserk this week after billionaire, Bill Gates and his wife, Melinda, called off their 27-year-marriage. Although the divorce appears amicable, we know a Nigerian divorce between billionaires would have been chaotic. So on this episode of #JustImagine, we created two fictional characters: Belu and Mide. Belu’s Ikoyi Mansion. Belu is hiding in his […]
It is safe to agree that Nigerian politicians were the kings of comedy until Donald Trump entered the game in 2017. And suddenly, we had competition. So in this episode of #JustImagine, we decided to take a break from superheroes and Disney princesses and explore politics. Trump’s Villa In Banana Island. Trump is squinting at a […]
We don’t have light in Nigeria, so there’s no way a Nigerian version of Captain America would have been built in a mega laboratory. Who will be fueling gen? So, for this episode of #JustImagine, we decided to import Captain America. Would he survive in Nigeria for a day? The date is June 6, 2021. […]
Everyone knows Nigerian universities are designed to break you. But when you’re the god of thunder, it should be easy, right? On this episode of #JustImagine, we reimagine Thor as a Nigerian student named, Tomiwa. Campus Hostel Bode, Tomiwa’s friend and roommate, is standing outside the hostel addressing a small crowd. The crowd is agitated. […]
On this episode of Just Imagine, we take out the cast of Fast & Furious and replace them with Nigerians. The result is a mess.
There’s a reason the west has superheroes and we have ‘agberos’ — it’s because we don’t send anybody in this country. But let’s assume, for a hot minute, that we did have superheroes, how long do you think they’d survive? Today, I chose to reimagine Batman as an Igbo man named Buchi. And because Batman […]
In this week’s episode of Just Imagine, we reimagine the famous movie Titanic with Nigerians onboard.
In a frustrating Lagos, we reimagine Superman as a 30+ Yoruba man named Kola.
Can you imagine Daphne Bridgerton and Simon as Nigerians?
We reimagined Sleeping Beauty’s prince as an unemployed man named Endurance. It’s exactly as messy as it sounds.
We reimagined Belle from Beauty and the Beast as a stressful Nigerian named Bose. You can only imagine how crazy things get.
If you ask any ‘90s kid to describe a Disney princess, they’ll probably paint the picture of a soft-spoken, fragile and helpless woman who only sings, bakes, sighs and waits for Prince Charming to show up and save her. However, have you ever wondered what it might have been like if Disney princesses were average […]
“You think you’re doing me Ariel, you’re only doing yourself.”
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Were you as gentle as a dove or were you a troublesome child? What you score on this quiz will expose you.
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