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  • Year after year, you start January in the gym with ginger and vim to look like a Marvel avenger. And year after year, you disappear from the gym before February even starts booting. Yes, we know all of you. 

    As Zikoko’s resident gym bro, I’m here to take these shackles off your feet so you can dance squat. Follow these tips if you’re tired of living a fake gym life and ready to achieve your fitness goals for real. 

    Marry your trainer or the owner of the gym 

    Why adopt the fitfam life when you can literally marry into it. If paying money isn’t enough of a commitment to keep you in the gym, then getting married to someone who works there will motivate you to take it seriously this year. After all, a couple that gyms together can break both spiritual and physical yokes against your fitness goals. Amen? 

    Find a babalawo to bury your destiny under the gym 

    Motivation is sweet, but using juju is sweeter. Find the closest babalawo, preferably one who works out (so he can have perspective), and get him to put your destiny in a groundnut bottle you can bury at your gym. This way, the gym will be on your mind 24/7. 

    Pay for a whole year 

    Will you run away from the gym after paying for a whole year? I doubt it. Even if you don’t spend the entire year on the treadmill, that debit alert will haunt and ginger you to spend at least three months in the gym. 

    Break up with your lover today

    No amount of pre-workout, energy drinks or coffee will fuel your workout like severe heartbreak. The pain of leaving a relationship for the confusion and stress of the streets will have you at the gym at 6 a.m. squatting 220 kg with nary a belt in sight. 

    Last last, na everybody go chop breakfast, so why not speed up your own breakfast for the greater good. 

    Start a part-time job as a bouncer 

    The reason you’re not taking the gym seriously is because it’s not part of your job requirements. Didn’t we all learn how to navigate Zoom, Airtable and Notion during the pandemic? One way to commit to the gym this year is by starting a job that requires you to be there 24/7. Have you seen a bouncer without bulging muscles? Neither have I. Do with that information what you will. 

    RECOMMENDED: All the Ways to Lose Weight Without Going to the Gym

    Think of all the bed-breaking sex you’ll have 

    Research has it that people who work out last longer in bed. Yes, this is the one I knew you’d like. If you want marathon sex, you must be prepared to run a marathon on the treadmill first. You can’t reap where you didn’t sow. 

    Quit your job 

    If you’re always complaining about your job holding you back from living your best fitfam life, then it’s time to quit. Yes, you might be broke and start begging for money on the streets, but at least you’ll be consistent in the gym. My dear, a win is a win. 

    Find a house close to the gym 

    Why is your gym two buses and a donkey ride away from where you live? See, to excel at this gym thing, you need to live opposite, beside, adjacent, under or on top of a gym. It doesn’t matter what position you take in this arrangement. Please, just be close to the gym. 

    Go for deliverance

    Once again, what God cannot do does not exist. The spirit of abandoning the gym can be broken by some Goya oil and a little dry fast. Go to Shiloh if you must. 

    Just move into the gym 

    If you’ve tried everything else on this list and nothing stuck, then my dear, I believe it’s time to try something extreme. But not to worry, I have this one final tip. You can’t escape the Smith machine or dumbbells when they’re your roommates. Give this some serious thought. 

    ALSO READ: The 7 Ghetto Struggles of Resuming the Gym After Taking a Long Break 

    Starting tomorrow (January 31st, 2023)

  • You said “fuck the gym” because you wanted to do detty December. Now, the holiday is over and you have to face your demons AKA all the calories you gained in just two weeks. 

    If you’re resuming the fitness lifestyle after being away for a while, you can relate to these struggles.

    Locating the gym 

    There’s a high chance you won’t remember where your gym is. You can’t even text your fitness trainer because you deleted their number from your phone when they were sending you reminders to come to the gym during the holidays. 

    Soreness 

    The body pain you’ll feel after your first day back at the gym, ehn? For every part of the body you move, you’ll feel pain. Is this gym even worth it sef? 

    Remembering how to do the exercises 

    Your trainer will tell you to do a side jack knife, and your head will start to hurt. Is that a real exercise or not? What the hell are cable chops? Let’s not even go into how your form will be completely shit for the first two days. 

    Dieting 

    You’ve gotten used to eating whatever you want at whatever time you like, and now, your trainer tells you to go back to the life of eating vegetables, intermittent fasting and staying away from alcohol. How are you supposed to do that? 

    ALSO READ:  Eat These Delicious Foods And You Won’t Gain Weight. We Promise

    The stamina of a 70-year-old 

    You that they used to call “Treadmill Usain Bolt”. Two weeks away from the gym and you can’t even run at speed eight for ten minutes straight without panting like a dog in heat. 

    Making it to the gym

    You broke your daily routine of getting dressed and going to the gym. Now every day for the next two weeks, you’llspend a good 30 minutes convincing yourself why fitness is worth it. Your mates that aren’t going to the gym, did they die?  

    Tears 

    After drinking, eating and sleeping the entire holiday, you expect to have added weight (If you’re one of those people who can eat without adding weight, please leave this place, mscheeew). But even with the expectation, you’ll still shed a few tears when you see the number on the scale. Now, you regret eating that plate of jollof rice at 2 a.m. Also, you’ll cry out of frustration because the weight won’t go in one day.

    If you’re not a gym lover, here are All the Ways to Lose Weight Without Going to the Gym

  • If you’re thinking of dating a gym bro, wait first. Before you make your decision, read about the pros and cons of being with a gym lover first. I’ve listed seven important ones below. If you’re already dating one, well…I don’t know whether to say that I’m happy for you, or to say sorry. Whichever one applies to you. 

    Pro: He’ll do all the heavy lifting 

    You don’t have to worry about changing the water dispenser ever again. He lifts heavier than that in the gym. When you both go grocery shopping, you won’t have to worry about carrying the bags. 

    Con: He’ll use soreness as an excuse to not do anything

    Ask him to wash plates, and it’s, “My body hurts from all the weights I carried at the gym. I really pushed myself.” 

    Pro: He’ll never get tired in bed 

    All that cardio gives him great stamina to last long during sex. He won’t start breathing heavily after two minutes just because of small thrusting and moving around. 

    Con: Forget about morning sex 

    No early morning sex for you because your gym bae will be at the gym from 5:30 a.m. No late morning or afternoon sex either because he’ll be too tired from the gym. Sigh.

    Pro: It’s easy to get them presents 

    Just buy him the latest gym supplement, a new gym bag or workout clothes and shoes, and he’ll love you forever.  

    Con: Money for dates will go to gym supplements 

    Instead of taking you to nice places, he’ll spend all his money on pre-workout and whey protein supplements. Na wa o.

    ALSO READ: You People Are Spending This Much Money on Gym?

    Pro: He’ll never get tired of you sleeping on his arms

    The weight of your head is nothing compared to the dumbbells and barbells he carries every day. Even if your whole body is on his arm, he won’t feel it. 

    Con: He has muscles but can’t fight 

    With all his big muscles, there’s a high chance he can’t fight. So you can’t even threaten anybody who tries to mess with you by telling them, “My boyfriend will beat you.” It’s like having a pet dog that can’t scare intruders.

    Pro: He’ll help with your fitness goals

    You’ll never slack with your fitness goals. He’ll help you stay on track with your diet and make you follow them to the gym. 

    Con: He’ll talk and talk about gym stuff

    He’ll use every opportunity he gets to talk about gym-related things. Every five seconds, you’ll hear about reps and gains. What about gains in the bank account or the holy spirit? 

    Pro: They’re always cooking 

    Gym bros cook a lot because their meals must be made in specific ways to fit their diets. So you’ll never have to worry about hunger because he’ll cook for both of you. I’m not saying it’ll be sweet sha. 

    Con: He’ll try to make you join annoying diets 

    He’s depriving himself of things and wants you to join him in his suffering. Tayo, I don’t care about having a flat stomach. I want to eat shawarma. 

    Pro: He’s very nice to look at 

    His hot gym body is always nice to look at and touch. Yes, please, flex those muscles for me.

    Con: Other people think so too

    As you’re staring at his lovely body, thinking how you can’t wait to be all over that, somebody else is doing the same. And because he’s a man, he’ll cheat. 

    Pro: He can lift you up

    He’ll lift you up without stress. Whether it’s during sex, when your feet are hurting, or when you want to see the stage at a concert and everyone’s blocking you. 

    Con: Pillow fights become dangerous 

    You can’t play certain games because one hit from him will send you to the emergency room. 

    ALSO READ: Pros and Cons of Being a Nigerian Gym Bro

  • Everything in Nigeria is expensive, and gyms are not left out. So if you’re trying to lose weight or stay fit, you should try these FREE but very effective methods. 

    Portion control

    You may have already tried this, so maybe the problem is not the food you eat. How about you try limiting the access people have to you? Because it’s only see-finish that’ll make people comment on your weight in the first place.

    Live in Nigeria

    Working out is hard, country hard too. So instead of going to the gym, you can stay up to date with all the Nigerian economy news while dating someone in Lagos, Abuja, Port Harcourt or Benin. Don’t ask us any questions; just try it and you’ll see results. 

    Stop avoiding breakfast

    When you know that breakfast is an essential part of every life. Why are you now running from breakfast then? Let that Yoruba man break your heart. You’ll definitely lose weight. 

    Drink water 

    Food is already expensive. So focus on drinking plenty water and minding your business. 

    Be a side piece

    Nothing makes your heart beat faster than doing something you know you’re not supposed to do. So imagine what all that sneaking around will do for your heart? What other cardio do you need? 

    Start a fight online

    You already spend most of your time online away. So just have a controversial take on any of the never-ending Twitter arguments, and watch them drag you from all corners. It’s like yoga, but with more vawulence. 

    Work in a Nigerian start-up

    If you thought living in Nigeria was hard, try working in a Nigerian startup. Imagine giving your soul and blood for the job, collecting ₦70k salary and still having to be physically present at their island office when you live on the mainland. Ah, you must lose weight. 

    NEXT READ: If You’ve Ever Tried To Lose Weight, These 10 Struggles Will Trigger You 

  • Every gym has different kinds of people that we feel differently about. But one day, we’ll give a piece of our minds to those people who intimidate us at the gym with their oversabi. If that’s you, take this quiz and we’ll fish you out.

  • Many things will chop your money in this country. If you’re a frequent gym-goer and a fitness lover, that lifestyle will empty your pocket. 

    I’ve been curious about how much people spend on their fitness lifestyles, so I decided to ask. And all I have to say is that people have money in this country. 

    Tayo*, 39

    My gym subscription costs ₦15,890 per month and I go to the gym four times a week, and my transport is ₦200 daily, ₦4,000 a month. Then, I buy food worth about ₦1,400 on my way back from the gym. I also eat a lot of eggs; I fry 4-5 eggs a day, which means I finish a crate of eggs in a week and a half at most. So I spend about ₦8k on eggs in a month. In total, that’s approximately ₦27,890 on fitness.

    Lionel*, 34 

    I’m trying to eat healthy now, and that takes about ₦10,000 a week from my account. There’s this particular salad I make every day, and it involves a lot of expensive ingredients. The only other fitness thing my money goes into is gym subscription, and that’s ₦60,000 monthly.

    Take this: QUIZ: How Much of a Fitness Guru Are You?

    Amaka*, 26

    I spend about ₦70,000 – 95,000 monthly on my fitness lifestyle. I buy gym clothes spontaneously, I never budget for them. I buy when I see something I like, so I can’t say how much I spend on gym wear. But my gym membership is ₦15k monthly, and I also pay for personal training; another ₦15k. I spend roughly ₦35 – 40k on food each month because I’m mostly on a protein diet and whey protein every other month costs ₦25k. 

    Tunde*, 22

    I don’t spend too much at the moment because I haven’t started using supplements yet. I’m trying to bulk up, but because I don’t have the money to do it the healthy way, I spend on things people consider cheat meals such as a litre of ice cream. That takes about ₦10 – 12k from my pocket. For gym clothes, I visit Iya Chika’s okrika store near my bus stop and buy ashewo shorts and singlets or shirts. I don’t spend more than ₦1,500 per item. Monthly registration at my gym is ₦18k, but they do this corporate package where 3 – 5 people can register at once. So I and three other people from my gym pay ₦13k instead. Transportation to and fro is ₦400 per day, and I go six times a week. In total, I’d say I spend at least 25,000 monthly. 

    Flames, 30

    Most of my money goes to supplements. I buy one protein shake and one pre-workout supplement each month for a total cost of ₦98,000. The other two main things I spend money on are gym membership at ₦15k per month and personal training at ₦25k. I go to the gym five times a week, where I buy at least two bottles of water for ₦200 each. That’s a total of ₦5,000 in a month. In summary, at least ₦143k goes into my fitness lifestyle each month. 

    ALSO READ: 7 Lies All Fitness Trainers Tell Their Clients 

    Charles*, 27 

    I pay for my gym yearly, and that costs about ₦192,000. My daily transportation to the gym is about ₦2,000, and I go five times a week. I buy three Whey Proteins at once for ₦32,000 each, so I don’t have to think about that for the next three months. As for food, the major thing I spend a lot of money on is Greek yoghurt. I buy it four times a week, and it costs me ₦1600 each time. I don’t buy clothes that often, but when I do, I spend no less than ₦30,000 because of the bloody dollar rate.

    Damilola*, 35

    I spend ₦13,600 on personal training, and my gym subscription is ₦15,900 monthly. I don’t use supplements because I have no reason to. That money goes into buying vegetables, which cost me at least ₦20k each month. About ₦15 -20k goes into gym outfits and that’s about it. In total, I spend at least ₦64,000 monthly on my fitness lifestyle. 

    Emeka*,25

    About ₦101,000 goes into my love for fitness every month. I’m currently bulking, so I buy a lot of junk food and chicken, and that’s why I spend ₦30k on food monthly. Supplements cost me ₦40k and my gym takes ₦16k from my account monthly. I spend at least ₦5k on gym gear; I’m either buying gloves, knee wraps, lifting straps, etc. And my outfits cost a minimum of ₦10k.

    Diana*, 25 

    I don’t spend that much on fitness majorly because all my money goes into savings. My gym subscription is about ₦16,000, and that’s the highest amount that leaves my account monthly. I buy thrift gym clothes, but not often. The last time I bought some was in March, and it cost me about ₦4k. The most I’ve ever spent on gym wear is ₦16k. As for food, I live in my parents’ house, so I don’t buy anything. I’m not exactly on any diet, so there’s no need for me to spend money on specific types of food. I walk to the gym and back because it’s not far from my house, so I don’t spend on transport. 

    ALSO READ: The Zikoko Guide to Dating a Gym Rat

  • Whether we want to admit it or not, working out feels like a very sexual thing. From routines like hip thrusts and squats to push ups, there’s something about all these movements that just scream fornication! It also doesn’t help that personal trainers and gym rats keep shouting these sexual phrases at one another. 

    Oh, and in case you didn’t know, sex is also a form of exercise that burns a ton of calories. 

    Here’s a list of things men can say in the gym and also during sex.

    1. “Arch your back properly” 

    How are you going to get good results if they don’t put their back into it? It doesn’t matter whether it’s an intense session with your sneaky link or a sweaty gym session with your bros, everyone needs to arch their  backs.  

    2. “Maintain your grip” 

    Sometimes you have to remind them to “hold it well” so it doesn’t fall and get somebody injured. No matter what you’re doing, safety must always come first. I’m just looking out for you bro. 

    3. “What am I supposed to do with this one?” 

    Omo, you’re not alone. We all get confused sometimes. Either the equipment is too big, too small or just not what you expected. It’s better to ask questions than to make mistakes. Sho get? 

    4. “Bend down well”

    This one is very important. Please go down low  so you can get a good work out dear. 

    RECOMMENDED: 11 Things You Can Say on a Zoom Call and Also in the Bedroom

    5. “This thing is heavy o”

    It do usually be shocking sometimes. LOL

    6. “Push your chest out”

    Are we here to play? Please push your chest out so you don’t injure yourself.

    7. “This position is painful” 

    Shout it if necessary, because if you keep quiet, you’re just doing yourself. 

    8. “Work on your form”

    See, form is everything. It doesn’t matter how low, deep or heavy you go, if your form is trash, the whole session is trash. There’s also a chance you might break your back or knees. Is it really worth it? 

    9. “Don’t rush it, feel every pump” 

    Working out and having sex is way better when everyone involved takes their time to really enjoy the process. Why are you running? Breathe in and out, calm your nerves and enjoy everything. 

    10. ” We can take turns “

    Where’s the fun in either working out or having sex if you’re doing just one thing from start to finish? Boring! 

    11. “Can you spot me?”

    No man is an island. We should all be our brother’s keepers both in the gym and during knacks. 

    12. “Are you done?” 

    Too much of anything is not good — except money sha. Sometimes you have to remind the other person that you have other things to do. You can’t be working out or fornicating from morning to night abeg. 

    ALSO READ: 12 Things You Can Say During Sex And At A Job Interview

  • These days, almost every guy is going to the gym and working out as if there’s a war coming and we just don’t know what to make of it. With the rate at which mandem are hitting the gym these days, it only felt right that we explore some of the pros and cons of becoming a Nigerian gym bro. 

    Pro: People fear you because they think you can fight

    The moment your chest starts looking like throw pillows trapped under a blanket and your arms look bigger than someone’s head, everyone around you automatically assumes you know how to fight. You’ll find men hailing you randomly with “big man”, “boss” and every other oga-adjacent name in the Nigerian dictionary. This is good for your self-esteem, and to be honest, it’s just great to know no one will try nonsense with you out of fear. 

    Con: Muscle is vanity and you can’t fight

    Tell the truth and shame the devil. Can you fight? Having big ass muscles is great, but you’ll need more than that to win a fight. Remember how small David finished Goliath with a catapult? That’s about to be you when you decide to use your vanity muscles in a real fight and die because your opponent decided to throw an antique Nokia phone at your forehead. Better sit down and add more whey protein to your pap.

    Pro: Women want to hold and touch your arms all the time 

    Women love to hold arms. I don’t know why, but it does something for them. That and rubbing a bald head like they’re expecting a genie to jump out of it. When you become a gym bro with big arms, your girl and her girls will grab your arms for no reason. It’s actually cute. 

    Cons: Women really really like the arm thing and you’ll get tired of it

    Even though I initially described it as cute, the cuteness will wear off and you’ll slowly start dying inside. Sis, leave my arm alone now! Do you want to remove it and take it home as a souvenir from my burial? 

    Pro: Going to the gym and eating clean improves your mental and physical health

    Every gym bro who actually eats right and maintains a consistent routine will tell you that they wake up and go to bed feeling really good. Yes, life and this shithole Nigeria will frustrate you daily and no amount of Romanian Deadlifts can save you from that. But at least you know the one place you can escape and be in control is the gym, and it feels so fucking good. 

    Cons: Improved mental and physical health, but at what cost? 

    Living a healthy life is expensive AF! Why am I buying a “healthy” wrap full of leaves for ₦3000 when I can buy a shawarma and a low-budget bottle of diluted wine for the same amount. Then there’s a gym membership, protein shake, creatine and pre-workout money? It’s too much abeg. 

    RECOMMENDED: 8 Workouts that are Definitely from the Pits of Hell

    Pro: You’ll look good naked

    I don’t even have to say too much about this. Gym bros and removing their clothes unprovoked go hand in hand. Working out builds your confidence and that’s why all you need to do is breathe and a gym bro will take off his shirt (and pants sometimes) just to show you his gains. Oshey, Ikeja Chris Hemsworth! We keep saying it’s to track progress, but deep down, we’re just whores of Babylon. 

    Con: Your whole existence becomes a thirst trap

    The moment you post a shirtless picture or a picture in your underwear tracking your quads or hamstrings growth, people will rush into your comments shouting “thirst trap” and “ashewo”. It’s almost like gym bros can’t breathe without being sexualised. We just want to have peace and be treated like every other human. Is that too much to ask? 

    Pro: Your clothes will fit better

    When you work out, clothes fit better. You can rock the yassified version of the classic igbo man mosquito net shirt or really tight shirts, and it’ll all just fit like a glove. Your clothes will always give what they’re supposed to give. But kindly note that if you didn’t know how to dress before,, becoming a gym bro isn’t some How Do I Look? style intervention. 

    Con: Your old clothes don’t fit anymore

    Being naked is not a bad thing, but at some point, you’ll have to wear clothes and what will you do when your clothes don’t fit anymore? We talk about this sensitive issue in hushed tones and it gets swept under the rug a lot, but the same thick thighs that save lives do usually rip your jeans every two months. Your favourite trousers will turn into leggings and your favourite shirt will start to restrict your airflow. E choke for real, my brother. Who has money to be changing clothes in this economy? 

    Pro: You make friends with other gym bros

    There’s always a community of other gym bros looking to support and champion you on. When you hit a new personal record, they’re there to hail you. And when you feel like you can’t push through that final rep, they’ll scream and shout until you actually do it. It’s actually really sweet how gym bros show up for each other. 

    Con: Weight can fall on your head any time, any day

    This is pretty self-explanatory. As someone who has had a barbell fall on his face and scatter his teeth, I can confirm that this and other gym accidents usually happen once in a while. Are you sure you can handle it? 

    ALSO READ: 8 Types Of Men You’ll Meet At The Gym

  • After almost 40 days and 40 nights, January is finally coming to an end. 

    Knowing that most of you love to live fake lives, we can bet that the end of January will mark your last day in the gym even after all the “New year, new me” gra-gra you were doing. While working out is hard AF, it comes with a lot of perks. We decided to compile a list of benefits that might inspire you to maintain your gym ginger for at least another three months. 

    1. You did this quitting shit last year already, change. 

    In 2021, you joined the gym in January and didn’t even wait for the month to end before you ran away. Now, here you are again in 2022 about to do the same thing. Are you not ashamed of yourself? Are you not embarrassed? If you want to join, join. If not, stay at home and eat your semo like the heathen that you are. 

    2. So you can fight your boss when they delay your salary 

    This one is very necessary. If you work in an office where they keep owing you salary, we advise you to summon up courage and fight your boss. To do this effectively, you have to be fit. If you beat them once, chances are your salary will never come late again. 

    3. Time to frustrate your ex

    You see that ex that showed you pepper? It’s time to give them revenge body. One of you will have to deactivate their socials because the internet will not be able to contain both of you. 

    4. Win back your ex

    We know some of you, they’ve used rope to tie your destiny. So if your goal is to go back to your ex and win their affection, a new gym body might just do the trick. If they break up with you again, you can channel your hot tears into more reps at the gym. Either way, you win . 

    5. So you can last longer in bed

    Research carried out by people who fornicate regularly seem to indicate that people who work out tend to last longer in bed. Yes, that’s the one you like abi? We’re not surprised. If you’re looking for marathon sex in 2022, we’ll suggest you run a marathon on the treadmill first. Simple arithmetic, that is the figure eight. 

    6. Starting an Onlyfans 

    2022 is about income diversification; banker by day, Onlyfans entrepreneur by night. If you need the motivation to stay in the gym, think of all the cold hard foreign currency you’ll be getting from being a lirru bit spicy on the interwebs. 

    7. Summer 2022 is for crop tops 

    If I don’t start wearing crop tops by June this year, call me a — never mind. 

    8. So you can fight conductors for change

    We’re not taking nonsense this year. It’s time to rack conductors that keep trying us because honestly, enough is enough. If you go to the gym and get big muscles, they won’t even have the liver to try you in the first place. 

  • Christmas is coming, and as usual, we’re forced to buy gifts for other human beings in the name of “relationship”. Anyway, if your lover likes to spend countless hours in the gym instead of in bed with you, we have a couple of affordable gift options they’d love to have while working out. While some might sound ridiculous, we implore you to take risk and succeed. 

    1. Ashawo shorts

    If you ask a gym bro why they love ashawo shorts, they  will tell you it allows them to spread their legs to squat properly, but we all know it’s a bloody lie from Lucifer. It’s just an opportunity to advertise their toned thighs in the gym. If you are looking to help your lover sell their market, you should probably order a pack of these. 

    2. Primary school water bottles

    Working out can leave you dehydrated and that’s why having a bottle of water at all times is very essential. Looking to go the extra mile to ensure your lover has a steady supply of cold water at all times? Well, we suggest you invest in one of the water bottles we used to take to school when we were younger. These bottles are so heavy, they could pass for gym equipment. All your partner has to do is hang the rope on the neck while doing pull ups. We’ve heard the results are mind-blowing.

    3. Curate a playlist filled with chaotic Terry G songs

    As a supportive partner, we suggest you create a playlist with old Nigerian songs that are chaotic and loud for no reason at all. Nothing gingers a person  more in the gym than listening to Terry G’s Free Madness. Listening to songs like this constantly while lifting crazy weights will definitely free their inner madman. It might not be your main goal, but in this life, you reap what you sow. 

    4. Food flask

    We’ve all seen that picture of people turning a Nigerian gym into Mama Put. Well, buying your partner a food flask for the gym shows that you’re a thoughtful lover with foresight. The next time they go to the gym and there’s food, they’ll be able to bring a little takeaway home to you. They can also use the food flask to eat swallow when they decide not to do this gym thing again. 

    5. White handkerchief, not towel

    We all sweat in the gym, so this is important. Get your partner a pack of white handkerchiefs they can use in the gym. Why? Well, if you get them a towel, chances are they might become lazy and not wash it (God help you if it’s brown). To avoid stories that touch, get them white handkerchiefs, so any time they see the dirt from their face they’ll be forced to wash their handkerchiefs. Also, if they ever decide to become cultural dancers, handkerchiefs would be the least of their worries.

    6. Pay for their gym membership for a year

    This is for people who have funds. If you’re broke, kindly wait for the next Black Friday or Christmas bonanza at your local store. Like Davido said, “Love is sweet o. When money enter love is sweeter.”