Boyin Plumptre

Boyin Plumptre

Scammer-at-large. Might hug you for no reason.
June 12, 2020

When it comes to life goals, ask the average Nigerian and they’ll tell you something along these three lines: l’owo (have money) L’ola (have wealth) L’alaafia (have rest of mind) Take those same Nigerian across the pond and the story stays largely the same. The elements of wealth and money being apparent, while peace of […]

June 11, 2020

After defeating the little leagues of your siblings stealing your meat and bedwetting at sleepovers, the final evil boss of your childhood was probably having to deal with the menace that is chores. From graduating from having chore time tables, to being responsible for the cleanliness and order of your own apartment, we can attest […]

June 3, 2020

When it comes to navigating difficult terrain, there’s nobody better than a Nigerian young adult to make a way out of it. From learning to dodge slaps, to perfecting the right speech speed and cadence to talk yourself out of a beating, the Nigerian youth is skilled in the art of getting away from the […]

June 2, 2020

Let’s get one thing straight, nobody should be re-opening anything in Nigeria with the climbing coronavirus numbers. We can’t believe we have to say this, but here we are. Starting in the first week of June, churches and mosques around Nigeria will be permitted to re-open their spaces for mass congregation. Now we know Nigerians […]

May 29, 2020

You know, for people who have the hardest time permitting their children to attend sleepovers, inter-state excursions and any program not designed for the church or mosque, Nigerian parents are awfully trusting when their children decide an education abroad is what they want to spend a few years of their lives pursuing. And when it […]

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May 28, 2020

So far, every month in 2020 has given us its version of an uppercut to the jugular. We’ve lost Kobe and Gigi, a global pandemic broke out, we’ve had to stay isolated, murder hornets came back (then left?) and for May’s champion – repeated vile and racist attacks against black people in the US. John […]

May 22, 2020

In January 2020, Kay — awesome writer over at TechCabal, (Zikoko’s sister publication) spent a month in South Asia, touring the borders between Bangladesh and India. In preparing for this interview, I spent an inordinate amount of time getting lost in Bangladeshi cuisine, using maybe all of 3 minutes to learn about everything else (JK. […]

May 21, 2020

Can you think of anything worse than living to stunt and having very few people to witness your drip in person? If you’ve been alive for the past few months, then you’ve definitely been in some type of lockdown, isolation or quarantine because of the virus. Your eyebrows have probably grown out. Little children can […]

May 20, 2020

For the most part, Ghana and Nigeria share a peaceful relationship. Nigeria exports its banging afrobeats, Ghana washes it down with its infinitely easy on the ears highlife. We ping and pong between both locations for December rocks and chummily refer to each other as ‘chale’ and ‘oga’ from across the border. It’s all love […]

May 19, 2020

Since December 2019, the whole world has been reeling from a bad hand, which has now extended to a chokehold, courtesy the coronavirus. With the symptoms of COVID-19 taking varying degrees of seriousness, from a dry cough to tiredness, to more significant indicators like conjunctivitis, the loss of smell and a great difficulty breathing, a […]

May 18, 2020

It’s a new week and Monday, perpetual bad vibes giver and our constant reminder of how short the weekend is, is back on his BS. As usual. Men. Now, even though we’ve called him out in the last, like most Yoruba men, Monday has refused to act right, and for that reason, we will be […]

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