7 Things Only People With Mind Can Do In A Nigerian Home

June 3, 2020

When it comes to navigating difficult terrain, there’s nobody better than a Nigerian young adult to make a way out of it.

From learning to dodge slaps, to perfecting the right speech speed and cadence to talk yourself out of a beating, the Nigerian youth is skilled in the art of getting away from the worst circumstances. 

Nigerian Relationships Ultimate Love

Well, that is unless you have -0 fucks to give and you’re ready for all the smoke Nigerian parents and the most judgy of Nigerian aunties can throw your way. Which brings us round to a special section of Nigerian  people. The ones with all the mind in the world. If you’re wondering who makes the cut, here’s a list of people whose bravery in their Nigerian homes must come specially sent from the gods, because e no too make sense:

Daring to enter your mother’s sitting room with coloured hair

Growing up in a Nigerian home

Doesn’t matter if she’s there or not. Just thinking it’s an okay thing to do is problematic.

Smoking in front of your parents

This does not apply to sometime African giants sha.

Having very obvious tattoos

Growing up in a Nigerian home

If you never had to wear a wrist watch to sleep or wear a t-shirt in crazy Nigerian heat to cover your tattoos, you are who we’re talking about.

Rocking leg chains in full view of your Nigerian father

Anyone know what it is about leg chains that gets everyone so worked up?

Dreadlocks. That’s the line

 Hmm. In a Nigerian home? Big energy.

Drinking publicly

And we’re even talking about the small stuff. How will Deacon take it if she sees you drinking can Orijin in the roof she was so kind to provide to you?

Sporting obvious piercings

Ultimate love day 26 wow

Yeah, we’re going to ask you to give us some of that excess mind you have over there.

You'll like this

April 24, 2020

The rise of new Nollywood has brought with it a host of exciting new stars like Adesua Etomi, Enyinna Nwigwe and many more. However, one star who never seems to get the due they deserve is the Lekki-Ikoyi bridge. Vey few Nollywood performers are as relentless and as hard-working as the bridge, who, without any […]

Boyin Plumptre

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

October 10, 2019

2019 is certainly Burna Boy’s year, but, if we are being honest, so was 2018. Since his transcendent mixtape, Outside, the afro-fusion star has refused to get his foot of our necks — dropping a string of fantastic singles and then capping it all off with his career-best album, African Giant.  So, in a bid […]

November 20, 2019

Last month, we thoughtfully made a quiz telling you guys exactly when you’ll marry, but some of you claimed that your spouse was nowhere to be found. Well, now we’ve created one that’ll tell you exactly who you’ll be dragging down that aisle. Take and start planning that wedding:

November 4, 2019

After successfully predicting when y’all are getting married (please, email any complaints to noneofourbusiness@nayousabi.com), we are back to tell you how much is currently in your account. How, you might ask? By using your taste in Nollywood, of course. Shhh. No questions. Just take it already:

October 29, 2019

We are going to be attempting to guess when you’ll marry based on your favourite Nigerian foods. What does your fave swallow have to do with when you’ll tie the knot? Please, don’t ask complicated questions. This quiz is rigorous and accurate (don’t quote us), so just take it already.

More from Inside Life

July 10, 2020

If you grew up with your dad being the best thing since they invented Canadian PR, this post is for you. 1) When your mum says no, you always run to meet your dad. Hehehe. 2) Your mum’s face whenever she sees your dad indulging you. Don’t jealous me pls. 3) Your dad whenever you […]

July 10, 2020

If your Nigerian mother has not said one of the following to you, is she really Nigerian? 1) “Do you have another mother?” Favorite weapon. 2) “I carried you for nine months.” Best used to garner sympathy from an audience. 3) “When I’m gone, you’ll miss me.” General market line. Followed by “you don’t appreciate […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.
January 27, 2020
Nigerians Talk is what happened when a motley crew of young Nigerians were put in front of a camera and asked a bunch of apparently random questions about life, love, money and more.
September 24, 2019
A group of Zikoko staff go on a road trip to every mainland country in ECOWAS West Africa

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X