Between the fuel scarcity and Bolt charging us the price of an organ for a ride, transportation costs have increased. What do you mean by VI to Lekki Phase 1 is ₦3k? If you’re not careful, you’ll spend your entire Detty December budget on transportation alone.
Here are eight other ways to move around.
Collect broom from the association of witches
For years and years, witches have had their own mode of transportation, and it has been working for them. They jejely use their brooms to fly and get to places. This December, find a witch and ask if they have an extra broom you can borrow. Not sure how much it costs to maintain a witch’s broom sha.
There are quite a few ferry terminals in Lagos. Ferries are cheaper and faster because they avoid all the nonsense Lagos traffic. The only thing is they only operate at specific hours and locations with water access.
Beg Otedola for his private jet
Or any celebrity with a private jet. Ask to follow them when they’re going out, and maybe they’ll drop you off somewhere close to your destination. You’ll just have to use a parachute to get down.
Order a dispatch bike and be the package
Imagine paying ₦2k from Ajah to Ikoyi. You can only get that price when you use a dispatch service. This December, find a dispatch service and order a ride to your destination. When the rider arrives, tell them you’re the package, and they need to find somewhere to squeeze you.
If your friend owns a car, find a way to carpool as much as possible. Even if they can’t drop you at your exact location, they’ll sha drop you somewhere close.
Ask an IJGB to pay
These people earn in foreign currency. ₦10k on Uber won’t affect their bank accounts. Spend their money!
Take danfo buses
People don’t like danfos for many reasons. But the truth is, they’re cheap. Is there a chance your outfit will be ruined on the bus? Yes. Will heat almost kill you from all the people squeezed into the bus? Yes. But you’ll only spend a fraction of the average December cab fares.
Stay at home
At the end of the day, your best bet is to do your detty December at home. Choose peace and a full bank account this holiday.
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