• Sometimes, life puts you in messy situations where you’re not sure if you’re doing the right thing or not. That’s what Na Me F— Up? is about — real Nigerians sharing the choices they’ve made, while you decide if they fucked up or not.


    Deji*, 32, came back to Lagos from Canada for Detty December expecting nothing more than good music, old friends and a good time. However, when a road trip with a close friend ended in an unexpected expense and an awkward fallout, he found himself questioning the line between generosity and entitlement.

    When you’re done reading, you get to decide: did he fuck up, or not?

    This is Deji’s Dilemma, as shared with Adeyinka

    I came back to Lagos for Detty December expecting a good time. I wanted to rest, enjoy myself and reconnect with people I hadn’t seen in a long time. I didn’t plan for anything stressful; I just wanted the trip to feel easy.

    Tade* is one of my closest friends. We’ve known each other for years, and I’ve always seen him as someone I can move with without overthinking. Since I landed, we’ve been hanging out almost every day. We’ve gone for raves, two concerts and have a few more shows lined up. From the beginning, we agreed to split bills. Everyone paid their way, and it never felt like an issue. That was why I didn’t expect a road trip to Ibadan to change the dynamic between us.

    I had a wedding to attend in Ibadan and didn’t want to go alone. More than that, I needed someone to drive. I don’t have a car in Lagos, and I wasn’t keen on navigating a December road trip with a random driver. Tade was the obvious choice.

    When I asked him, he wasn’t enthusiastic. He talked about the long drive, traffic and stress. I understood his hesitation, so I didn’t push. Eventually, he agreed, but only on the condition that I would fuel his car to Ibadan and back. I was surprised by the request, but I didn’t argue. I agreed and told myself it wasn’t worth turning into a back-and-forth.

    The trip to Ibadan went smoothly. The wedding was nice, we ate well and joked through most of it. I was genuinely glad I didn’t travel alone. On our way back to Lagos, the car started acting up somewhere along the road. We pulled over, called a mechanic, and after checking it, he said we needed to fix it immediately if we wanted to continue our trip. The cost was a bit over ₦100,000.

    [ad]

    Before I fully processed what he’d said, Tade turned to me and asked me to pay for it. I was taken aback. 

    In my head, a lot of things were happening at once. I’d already paid for fuel both ways. I’d covered feeding during the trip. Beyond this particular outing, I’d also brought him clothes from Canada, two pairs of sneakers and a designer perfume. I didn’t bring those things as leverage, and I hadn’t thought of them as something to count, but they were very present in my mind in that moment.

    I told him I couldn’t pay for the repairs. It was his car. We had agreed on fuel, not maintenance or repairs. If something had happened to my phone or my luggage during the trip, I wouldn’t have expected him to pay for it. I felt like I had already held up my end of what we discussed.

    Tade didn’t argue with me or raise his voice. He paid for the repairs himself and got back into the car. From that point on, his mood changed completely.

    The rest of the journey to Lagos felt uncomfortable. He barely spoke. When I tried to make conversation, his responses were short and flat. By the time we got back, it was obvious something had shifted between us. Since then, he’s been distant.

    He still replies to messages, but there’s a noticeable change. He takes longer to respond and doesn’t initiate plans the way he did before. We had already talked about more Detty December outings, but now I’m not sure if he’ll show up or not.

    From my perspective, I didn’t abandon him or leave him stranded. I paid for fuel as agreed. I covered food. I showed up as a friend in ways that weren’t transactional. I didn’t start listing those things to him because I didn’t want to sound petty, but I can’t pretend they don’t exist.

    At the same time, I keep wondering if I missed something obvious. Perhaps from his perspective, it felt like I had used his car and time, and then refused to step up when things went wrong. Or maybe he assumed that, since I was visiting from abroad, unexpected expenses would naturally fall on me.

    If he had said from the start that I would be responsible for any damage to the car, I would have thought more carefully about taking the trip. I might have still agreed, or I might have made a different plan. What unsettled me was the assumption that I should automatically take on that cost.

    Now I find myself replaying everything. Should I have just paid and moved on, especially since money wasn’t much of an issue? Or was I right to draw a line and refuse responsibility for something we never discussed?

    What makes this harder is that I value our friendship. Detty December is meant to be chill, but I’ve spent part of it navigating guilt. I don’t want this to be the incident that ruins our relationship. At the same time, I don’t want to apologise for something I don’t fully believe was wrong.

    I’ve been present and generous. And yet, here I am, questioning myself.

     *Names have been changed to protect the identity of the subjects.


  • Detty December is here and we all know what that means: holiday, endless parties, markets run and more food than you can stomach. But only true Nigerians will ace this quiz, can you?

    Take this test:

    Which is an ingredient of Detty December’s signature meal in Nigeria?

    [ad][/ad]

  • The Detty December Fest is officially kicking off the countdown to its 2025 celebration in Lagos, Nigeria, with the highly anticipated announcement of its first wave of global headliners.

    African and International Stars Set the Stage

    Solidifying its position as a cultural powerhouse, the festival has secured an incredible roster featuring both international hip-hop giants and leading African talents. The entire month-long event, running from December 7th to 31st, will be hosted at Ilubirin, Ikoyi, Bourdillion Road and the Livespot Entertarium, Oba Elegushi Beach Road, Lekki, Lagos. Detty December Fest is ready to provide an unforgettable open-air coastal setting for the performances.

    Fans can look forward to seeing multi-platinum selling American rapper, Busta Rhymes, a Hip-Hop icon, Bella Shmurda, Nigerian street-pop sensation, Juma Jux, Bongo Flava star from Tanzania.

    Performance & Programming Schedule (First Wave):

    Sat, Dec 6 — Grand Opening Concert (Aerial Show) [Ticket Link]

    Sun, Dec 7 — Grand Opening Show: A Cinematic Live Experience [Ticket Link]

    Sun, Dec 14 — Club X: The Beat Never Sleeps [Ticket Link]

    Thu, Dec 18 — Juma Jux Live in Concert [Ticket Link]

    Fri, Dec 19 — Busta Rhymes Live in Concert [Ticket Link]

    Sat, Dec 20 — Christmas Like a Movie (Variety Show) [Ticket Link]

    Sun, Dec 21 — Detty December Fest: One Night. Infinite Energy. [Ticket TBC]

    Sun, Dec 28 — Gunna Live in Concert. [Ticket TBC]

    Tue, Dec 30 — Last Call For… The Ultimate Detty December Rave [Ticket TBC]

    (Additional artists, surprise guests, and programming will be announced soon.)

    Exclusive Government Endorsement

    Adding significant weight to the event’s stature, the press release included an exclusive message from Minister Hannatu Musawa, the Minister of Art, Culture & the Creative Economy. Minister Musawa officially endorsed the festival, positioning it as a key strategic national platform

    About the Minister’s Message

    Minister Hannatu Musa Musawa’s video message recognises Detty December Fest as a defining contributor to Nigeria’s cultural ecosystem, spotlighting its role in strengthening Nigeria’s global creative presence and attracting holiday tourism.

    [ad][/ad]

  • We’re in the thick of the festive season, and it doesn’t matter whether your December is “detty” or clean; you will spend money. 

    But you still have to prepare for January’s 81 days of sapa, and that’s where these budgeting hacks come in.

    “Have a separate expenses account” — Jade*, 26

    I do this thing where I transfer the amount of money I can afford to spend per month in a separate spending account. After that, I freeze the bank app that contains my remaining funds, so I don’t take extra money when I finish my spending money. 

    Sometimes, I even give my friend my ATM card to hide it so I’m not tempted. This hack has helped a lot this month. I’ve spent about half of my spending money. When it’s exhausted, I’ll continue my December enjoyment inside my house. 

    “Go out with friends to split bills” — Nonye, 22

    I made a list of all the fun places I want to try this month and shared it with my friend group so we can select the places we can visit and share the bills. 

    For instance, we visited a Chinese restaurant on Christmas Eve, and after sharing the bill, my share only came to ₦25k. I’d have spent like ₦40k if I’d gone alone. Plus, I got to share out of everyone’s meals instead of spending so much on one meal without variety. We also split cab fares, and I paid only ₦7k instead of the ₦32k the cab charged.

    “Jump danfo bus if need be” — Emma*, 26

    Cab prices have been so high this period, so I’ve returned to my danfo roots. Imagine I spent only ₦1500 using danfo for a destination that a cab charged ₦27k for. It didn’t stop me from turning up when I arrived. So, take that danfo today. The means of transportation doesn’t matter, as long as you get there and have a good time.

    “Consider activities that don’t involve spending money” — Kola*, 25

    My partner and I are working with a strict budget this December, but it doesn’t mean we won’t have a good time. We intend to visit parks and take home-cooked food to turn ordinary outings into picnics. 

    We also had an indoor movie night on Christmas Day. I moved the chairs, spread blankets on the floor, and made popcorn and fried chicken. The whole thing was free, but we created memories. Don’t let anyone pressure you to overspend this season. 

    “Just improvise” — Ope, 27

    I can’t afford to attend concerts this year because of extremely high ticket prices and transportation costs. So, I’m improvising. To usher in the holidays, I found a mad DJ mix on YouTube and blasted it all day at home. My neighbours even joined in, and it became like a mini house party. I plan to do the same thing on New Year’s Eve. Concert or no concert, I’m having a fantastic time.


    *Some names have been changed for anonymity.

    NEXT READ: 7 Nigerian Millennials Share Hacks for Living Through Inflation

    [ad]

  • American musician Chloe Bailey touched down Murtala Muhammed International Airport on Sunday for her first Detty December, and we know exactly what she should do to get her in the spirit. These suggestions are Zikoko tested and approved to make her never forget Nigeria in her life.

    Image: thelagospaparazzi

    See below 12 things Chloe Bailey should try during this trip to Nigeria:

    Take Danfo bus

    The first thing she must do is take a Danfo bus to one of her events. This way, no one will ever doubt that she was indeed in Lagos. You know how people forget the things that they did on a trip? If she takes a Danfo to her event, she will never be part of that set of people.

    Attend an Owanbe

    We definitely suggest Chloe Bailey attend an Owanbe. Let her party in Aso-ebi, dance to King Sunny-Ade, and see food pass her face.

    Try amala and ewedu

    Since she is in Lagos, she should also try Amala and Ewedu. We recommend Amala Skye.

    Try roadside rice and beans

    The roadside rice and beans will definitely slap as a welcome-to-Lagos meal for Chloe Bailey.

    Try suya

    Street suya is a must for Chloe Bailey and her entourage from abroad, who want to show that they really came to Nigeria for Detty December.

    Feature Portable in a song

    To give her that oomph, a feature with Portable, Skepta style, will also bang this Detty December.

    Do Mother Christmas

    We also suggest that Chloe do some Mother Christmas. Let her feed the people with rice and groundnut oil, the gold of this T-Pain years.

    Hold a masterclass on wearing shoes on stage

    By popular demand, we need Chloe Bailey to hold a masterclass with some Nigerian musicians on how to wear shoes while performing on stage. Say no to bare feet.

    Beg T-Pain to take it easy on us

    It would be nice if she could help us beg T-Pain to have mercy on us and take it easy with the suffering.

    Support Nollywood 

    Chloe Bailey should definitely visit ICM during this visit to watch Funke Akindele’s Everybody Loves Jenifa and show support for Nollywood. Even better, let her do a meet-and-greet.

    Shop Okrika at Yaba

    It will be nice to see Chloe at Yaba Railway shopping for okrika and shoe gben gben for her performance later.

    Got a tattoo at Ikeja Underbridge

    If you come to Lagos and don’t get a tattoo at Ikeja Underbridge, did you even visit Lagos? We recommend a flower tattoo on her breast.

    ALSO READ: Soft Power: How Nigerians Dominated the Internet in 2024

    [ad]

  • What will Detty December look like in this great T-Pain year? On Thursday, December 6, 2024, the 5th edition of the concert Fuji: A Opera, themed “Fuji Vibrations 2024” offered an answer.

    Since its launch in 2020, the free Fuji music festival has remained dedicated to celebrating and bringing Fuji musicians closer to aficionados of the genre, music lovers, and fun seekers across generations, genders, and geography. What started as a one-off past-time shindig during the pandemic has metamorphosed into a running show that’s now in its fifth edition.

    This year, Fuji: A Opera’s ambitions expanded. Together with the Fuji Music Association of Nigeria (FUMAN), it flourished with sponsorship from brands like Imperial Black, Goldberg and UAC Foods Nigeria, partnerships with White Space Lagos, Schweppes Nigeria, the burgeoning women-wear champ Meji Meji, and UB Fabrics—which also clothed the VIPs in a sky-blue print covered with “FUJI.” The “and co” attire, adorned by only the most avid Fuji fans and the one percenters able to buy that card, was giving “family and friends of Fuji Opera.” Barbecue sellers set up shop, grilling meat by an open bar at the back. Cups of beer went ‘round, as did plates of Ofada, peppersoup (in the VIP section, though they ignored the media partners). Puffs from all kinds of smoke— cigars, cigarettes, Canadian loud enveloped the arena.

    Fuji: A Opera served a seasoned line-up of artists. DJ Kulet took over the stage a dozen times with her mix of Fuji sounds. Iyalode Music warmed up the crowd with her “alujo” dance music, before Alhaji Sikiru Lemon boosted the energy with his high-morale Fuji. Fatimo Ajoke Cinderella, who went viral for her song Allahu Motide, was the performer who didn’t miss a beat. She suddenly burst on stage introducing herself and then playing on the event name with “Opera Mini” before moving into a vigorous dance, reviving deeply anti-women ideas that also showed up in the welcome address by SK Sensation, the president of FUMAN.

    Rather than critique the systems that inhabit the women who have been for years victims of the sex trade, Ajoke Cinarella seized the opportunity to promote an old tired trope about the activities of women in sex work. “Pátá ashéwó ò kín n’ísin mi / Bó sé n bo, ló n wò, ló n bo, ló n wò,” she sang.

    SK Sensation started his speech by saying, in Yorùbá, “Ekáálé o (meaning ’Good evening’) to the baba (fathers), the alejo (guests), the ololufe (fans).” He ignored all the women at an event whose anchor is women — women performing on stage, women serving drinks, women in the audience; seated, standing, dancing.

    Singer Atawewe towed the same line, recognising only the men in the house even as he bragged that his detractors would never defeat him unless they weren’t “born out of a woman.” 

    Remi Aluko’s quirky, street-smart renditions of Afrobeats and gospel hits combined with aggressive, freestyle dance moves scored a warm moment with the audience. He did his Fuji version of Rema’s “OZEBA” and addressed the ongoing discord in the Fuji music world. He urged the elders to behave elderly and the youngins to show respect.

    The music jerked fast, but Lokoso Ajani, SK Sensation, and Aare Shina “Scorpido” Akanni, who Malaika and some other younger Fuji artists went to pay their respect to on stage, brought mid-tempo and veteran grooves that kept the agile and older folks in regulated moves. But that wasn’t for long. 59-year-old Abass Oberese, adorned in a grey-and-black coloured durag, vintage shirt, black jeans and white sneakers, stepped into the luminaire. He performed his hits “Asakasa” and “Mr. Teacher,” while the female dancers threw their behinds to the drum beats and Obesere’s hand directions—a nostalgic moment for those who grew up listening to his music in the early 2000s. Like the patron of Fuji music that he is, Wasiu Ayinde, AKA K1 De Ultimate, performed popular hits like “Ade Ori Okin” to close out the event. 

    But the acts that grabbed the crowd most were Malaika and Saheed Osupa, two beloved Fuji veterans who took the stage at the tail end of a lineup, an ensemble that included other musicians across the Fuji scene. Though it was almost midnight and a new day was knocking at Muri Okunola Park in Victoria Island when Malaika opened his set, his eclectic performance—which turned into a celebratory sing-along in front of hundreds of fans—kept fans awake, agile, and gyrating. He made the crowd throw their white handkerchiefs in the air with his “Aro Eyo” chant performance, a nod to Lagos’ Eyo cultural heritage.

    Saheed Osupa, on the other hand, started his set in the early hours of Friday and inflamed the stage with a rendition of his song, “Itanna Ogo”, off his “Fuji Icon” album. Then, he segued into an unreleased song in reverence to his home city, Ibadan, and to Dr. Sikiru Ayinde Barrister, the originator of Fuji music. Osupa reckoned that Barrister may be gone, but Fuji music is alive and thriving. In the same breath, Osupa emphasised Fuji as his first choice of music and honoured and deified Barrister. “Ósì wà l’existence, to bá ti n’ígbàgbó / Á gbé e wò lójijì tobá gbà fún Barry / Torípé ìmìsí Àyìndé Ògún òòkú o, musically lótún mín,” he sang, as he strutted the platform in a confident pace. Every second of a pause gave the audience the chance to rave in excitement and cheers.

    From start to finish, Fuji: A Opera prioritised the celebration of Fuji music, culture and artists, keeping alive the collective spirit it was designed to preserve. “We are doing this to get Fuji to make more statements in the world of music,” K1 De Ultimate said while presenting an award to the FUMAN president at the event. The vibe in the crowd was communal—old friends were reunited, and new friendships were made.

    In Case You Missed It, We Wrote About the 10 Greatest Fuji Music Albums of All Time

    [ad][/ad]

  • [ad]

  • As if all the shege we’ve seen in 2023 isn’t enough, Detty December just isn’t “dettying” as it used to. The cost of everything has tripled, and it’s starting to look like home is where the only fun we can afford is.

    But if you’re determined to have a lit December regardless, and still plan to attend music shows and be outside, you should arm yourself with the knowledge of what it would cost you.

    SPINALL – Party Of Your Dreams 2023

    When: December 17, 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. the next day.

    What to expect: Five-hour high-energy live performance from DJ Spinall at the Federal Palace Hotel and Casino, Lagos.

    Budget: Free. But if you live on the mainland, consider your cab fare.

    Flytime Fest (Rythym Unplugged)

    When: December 21, 6 p.m. to 3.30 a.m. the next day

    What to expect: Performances from some of our favourite names in Afrobeats at the Eko Convention Centre, Eko Hotels and Suites, Lagos.

    Budget: Only VIP tickets are available, and each costs ₦156,100.

    Rooftop Karaoke

    When: December 21, 6 to 11 p.m.

    What to expect: A chance to pretend like you know the lyrics to your favourite song and sing offkey. Location is the Boardroom Apartments, Prince Samuel Adedoyin St, Ikate, Lekki, Lagos.

    Budget: Free, but you’ll need to register.

    NATIVELAND Festival

    When: December 22, 3 p.m. to 2 a.m. the next day

    What to expect: An all-day party at NATIVE’s annual music festival, happening at Sol Beach, Lagos.

    Budget: Ticket prices start at ₦20k for students and go as high as ₦150k for the VIP experience.

    Palmwine Music Festival

    When: December 23, 2 p.m. till midnight.

    What to expect: A live music experience with Show Dem Camp (SDC), and of course, palmwine. Venue is the Muri Okunola Park, Lagos.

    Budget: Students can experience the festival with ₦21,100, but other ticket classes range from ₦31,600 to ₦73,600. If you identify as a “Superfan”, be ready to shell out ₦157,600.

    Flytime Fest x Kizz Daniel

    When: December 23, 6 p.m. to 1 a.m. the next day.

    What to expect: A night with the “Buga” and “My G” crooner at the Eko Convention Center. You might want to tag your Nigerian aunty along. Rumour has it that he’s popular with that age group.

    Budget: Only VIP tickets are available now, and you’ll need to shell out ₦104,100 to secure one.

    Otaku Connect ‘23 Lagos

    When: December 23, 10 a.m.

    What to expect: Otaku Connect ‘23 is an anime convention, so prepare to meet anime enthusiasts and cosplayers. It’s billed to happen at the Rango Rooftop Lounge, Lagos.

    Budget: Tickets start from ₦3,500.

    Afropiano Beach Festival

    When: December 23, 1 p.m. till midnight.

    What to expect: An all-day festival featuring vibrant and diverse sounds of African music, performed by some of the hottest Amapiano & Afrobeats DJs. Venue is Sol beach, Lagos.

    Budget: Ticket prices start at ₦25k.

    Flytime Fest x Davido

    When: December 24, 6 p.m. till 1 a.m. the next day.

    What to expect: I mean, it’s OBO. It’s happening at the Eko Convention Center, Lagos.

    Budget: This is also VIP-only, which costs a pretty ₦104,100 per ticket.

    Grand total spend:

    ₦433,900 only (exclusive of transportation costs)

    This total is based on the assumption that you only get student and general entry tickets where available, and are rich enough to attend all the shows — which you must be since you’re determined to have a lit December. 

    There are four shows on December 23 alone. But the more, the better, so hop from one show to the other. The goal is to have enough memories to hold onto when January’s sapa rolls in.


    NEXT READ: No Music Festival? 7 Alternative Ways to Properly Detty Your December

    [ad][/ad]

  • January has an extra 20 days, so we know you’ll have to spend wisely this December. But this doesn’t mean you can’t have any fun. If you want to have a Detty December without spending all your money in the bank and then some, we know all the places you should be at this month.

    Your imagination

    Your overactive imagination is already on overdrive, thinking up different ridiculous situations and making you delusional,  so you might as well put it to great use this December. Let your delusion lead you to the best time of your life.

    King’s Fest

    Devon King’s is throwing a party for their customers at the low low cost of zero naira. All you’ll have to do is register online and come ready to have a swell time 

    King’s Fest is  brought to you by Devon King’s and will be happening at Ikeja City Mall on the 16th of December. There’ll be a ton of fun activities; you don’t want to miss it. What’s more? You might even make new besties or meet a potential life partner there. Before we forget, there is a chance that you win electronic items, too. However you look at it, it’s a win-win.

     A children’s party

    Let’s explain. If you play Santa Claus at a children’s party the heat might finish you in that suit, but you’ll have a fun time, free food and drinks, and you’ll still get paid. You’re welcome.

    A stranger’s wedding 

    If you haven’t gotten the memo yet, everyone and their daddy are getting married this December. We suggest you wear your adult shoes, get dressed on a Saturday, find your way to the nearest event center, and gatecrash the hell out of weddings this month. Just make sure you avoid the bouncers so they don’t throw you out on your ass.

    Your house

    If you think about it, all you really need to have a good time is yourself, so we suggest you fight the boredom, look around your house, find all the things that’ll spark joy and do just that.

    Traffic

    If you love the fun and thrill of traffic drama, then that is just the place for you. Take a ride to the supermarket or something, play loud music and watch the people in your city act up and out.

    Family gatherings 

    Yes, they might make comments you won’t like and end up pissing you off, but you’ll have a good 5-10 minutes before that starts, so make good use of it.