Lagos might be the capital of chaos, but Ibadan is in a league of its own. Some months ago, we asked Lagosians to share the craziest things they’d seen in Lagos, and we got stories that ranged from a man attempting to fling his own poo at road officers to a road rage incident where two drivers took turns smashing each other’s cars.
But what about the ancient city of Ibadan? We decided to find out.
“I witnessed a stampede in Shoprite”
If you thought Lagosians were dramatic, you’ve clearly never seen Ibadan people react to something new. *Deji, 29, was there when Ibadan got its first Shoprite, and he barely made it out alive.
“When Ibadan’s first Shoprite opened in 2014, the city took it personally. Imagine the energy of a stadium concert but inside a shopping mall. My uni was in Ikire, Osun State, which was only a ₦150-200 naira bus ride away, so I decided to watch a movie at the cinemas. Big mistake. The crowd at the mall that day was unlike anything I had ever seen. Every corner was packed — old, young, entire families in matching aso-ebi — and the wildest part? Most of them weren’t even shopping. They were just there for the vibes.
I figured things would calm down by evening. Another mistake. When I returned, the crowd had somehow doubled. The security guys looked like they were fighting for their lives, desperately trying to manage the chaos. I had to accept my fate and return to school without watching the movie. Ibadan people, abeg, why do you like sightseeing inside malls?”
“Someone touched me inside a mini-cab”
Think you’ve had your fair share of unhinged bus rides? *Ife, 24, shares how she was harassed during a micra ride in Ibadan and how she had to cut her trip short.
“Public transport in Ibadan is already an extreme sport, but the day a stranger touched my lap in a micra (mini-cab) took things to a new level. I screamed, yanked his hand off, and looked at him, expecting him to at least pretend to be sorry. Instead, he just sat there, blinking like he was the victim. Before I could properly react, the other passengers — mostly older men and women — started defending him. “Ignore him, he’s not well. It’s not his fault; he doesn’t know what he’s doing.” Ehn? If they all knew he wasn’t mentally stable, why did they let him into the car? And how did they all know his medical history like this?
At that moment, I knew I had to remove myself from the equation. I told the driver to stop, got down, and had to walk the rest of the way.”
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“The bus driver wore a peplum blouse”
Buses in Ibadan are unpredictable, but Bisi, 27, wasn’t expecting a driver who looked like he had just walked off a wedding reception.
“See, there’s being comfortable in your masculinity, and then there’s whatever I saw in an Ibadan mini-van one afternoon. During a bus drive, the driver asked passengers to pass their fares around. That’s when I really looked at him and noticed he was wearing a full-blown peplum blouse. It wasn’t a disguise, it fit him too well to be an accident. The deep voice, bald head, and structured feminine blouse were like watching a crossover episode between Harrysongs and Bobrisky.
I looked around to see if anyone else had noticed, and thankfully, I wasn’t alone. One guy finally broke the silence and said, “Oga, nawa o.” That was all it took. Suddenly, the entire bus burst into laughter. Later that week, I saw a video of the same man trending online, and the comments were ruthless. In my head, I was like, “Why always Ibadan?” But lowkey, the banter was premium.”
“Mentally unwell men with big penises everywhere”
Ibadan has its fair share of mentally unstable people roaming the streets, but *John, 31, couldn’t help but notice an oddly specific pattern, one that has stuck with him since childhood.
“The first time I noticed, I was in secondary school. We saw this naked man touching himself in public, and because kids are idiots, my friends and I stayed there cheering like we were at a football match. Someone eventually chased us away, but I had never seen a grown man’s penis before, so it was shocking.
But it didn’t end there. As I got older, I started realising that there were so many mentally challenged men walking around with huge penises. I know it sounds crazy, but you literally can’t not notice. It’s like a specific Ibadan phenomenon. The weirdest part? These men are always near major roads or marketplaces, so you can’t even avoid them. I remember one time in Dugbe, a man stood in front of a bus park, completely naked, waving his junk at passersby. Nobody flinched. People just went about their business like it was another Monday. I had to ask myself if I was the mad one for being so shocked.”
“A woman brought her goat to the bank”
ATM queues in Nigeria are already stressful enough without someone showing up with their livestock. But Rasheed, 27, swears he saw it happen in Ibadan while serving.
“It was during the naira scarcity in early 2023, so banks were already war zones. People were fighting for cash everywhere you turned. I was in line outside a bank in Challenge when I noticed an old woman struggling with a rope. I followed the rope with my eyes, and lo and behold, it was attached to a full-grown goat.
At first, I thought she was leading it past the bank, but no. She actually joined the queue, holding onto the rope like it was a pet dog. Everyone was staring, but nobody said anything. When she finally got to the entrance, the security guard asked why she brought a goat to the bank, and the mama said she couldn’t leave the goat alone at home. They had to help her tie it outside while she went inside to sort her business. The entire thing was mad funny to me, but of course, I didn’t laugh. What if the goat was her disguising human companion or something? God, abeg.”
“I was pushed out of a moving car”
There are bad transport experiences, and then there’s entering a one-chance cab in Ibadan. *Debola, 27, thought she was just getting a regular ride back to the bus park until the driver and his crew decided to bring her into their scam.
“I was at UI for something, and on my way back, I boarded a Micra (because what else do you enter in Ibadan?). I was listening to music, half aware that the other passengers were having a conversation. Then, out of nowhere, someone tapped me and said, ‘Aunty, please, what do you think of this matter?’ Before I could even process what was happening, the driver launched into this too-detailed story about how a passenger had forgotten dollars in his boot. The ‘passengers’ (obviously his accomplices) were debating whether to report it to the police or split the money.
The moment I heard ‘forgotten dollars,’ my body reset. I remembered all the TikToks and Twitter threads I’d seen about one-chance scams and knew exactly what was happening. I told them I wanted to get down, but they kept trying to convince me to follow them so we could ‘share’ the money. That’s when I started screaming. Omo, these people pushed me out of the moving car. I hit the ground, rolled, and scrambled to my feet while they sped off. I was shaken, bruised, and in shock. I still don’t know how I didn’t break a bone that day. That happened in 2022, and I haven’t returned to Ibadan since. Crazy city for real.”
“I saw an amala seller washing pots with a jazzed-up broom”
Ibadan is the amala capital of Nigeria, but *Ben, 30, learned the hard way that not all buka experiences are created equal.
“I used to be one of those people who believed Ibadan amala was the best thing to ever happen to mankind until I saw things. One time, I went to this buka that was always packed, the kind where you have to hustle to wash your own plate before you get served. I was at the back of the shed, near the cooking area, when I saw the amala seller washing her pots with a broom. At first, I assumed it was the same type of broom they use to mash ewedu, but something wasn’t right. The broom had whitish beads around it, and it didn’t look normal. Omo, I dropped my plate and left immediately.
I’ve always heard stories about food sellers using ‘extra means’ to keep customers coming back, but seeing it happen so openly was wild AF to me. Since that day, I’ve been side-eyeing all the Ibadan amala PR. Y’all can keep it.”
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