Cities in Nigeria and the Football Clubs They Represent

April 16, 2022

Have you ever thought about what cities share the most similarities with your favourite football clubs? Well, we have, and now we’ve attempted to draw parallels between some of England’s biggest football clubs and places in Nigeria.

Akure – Tottenham

Small nyash wey dey shake sometimes. They had two minutes of good history and that was it. They’re both modest achievers and have a few notable individuals. Tottenham has a league cup to its name and Akure has… well, Shoprite and an airport.

Calabar – Arsenal

These two have a lot of good old days to remember. Just like Arsenal under Wenger played great football, Calabar used to be a really great place when it had that governor who built that famous mountain resort. Both are now better known for their lack of genuine progress. Calabarians bask in the golden years of Donald Duke just like Arsenal fans never stop bringing up their golden Premier League trophy from nearly 20 years ago.

Ibadan – Liverpool

A lot of history and notable figures with years and years of decay in the middle, and a renaissance engineered by a visionary leader in the persons of Seyi Makinde and Jurgen Klopp, respectively.

Port Harcourt – Chelsea

Loud, proud, notable individuals in recent history, great strides financed by oil money. Chelsea fans and folks from Port Harcourt are some of the proudest people you’ll ever meet.

Lagos – Manchester United

Great history. Many notable individuals. Ever since their iconic leaders (Babatunde Fashola and Sir Alex Ferguson) left them, they’ve been left at the mercy of administrators who haven’t measured up to standard. Meanwhile, fans and inhabitants of the club and city go to bed every night stressed, while trying to convince themselves they’re still as great as they used to be.

Abuja – Manchester City

They don’t have a long history or many notable individuals. In fact they don’t have as many inhabitants and fans as other cities and clubs around. But in terms of recent strides, they’ve become very high achievers thanks to the injection of oil money. Everyone is migrating from their cities and clubs to this city because they’re the shiniest new object in town. 

QUIZ: Can You Match These Football Coaches to Their Clubs?

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

September 10, 2018

Making legitimate money online for many young people would be the ultimate dream. For so many young people across the world, being able to find steady income-generating opportunities online, would allow them to quit their toxic day jobs and become their own boss.   In addition, being able to spend quality time with family while […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

May 21, 2022

The subject of today’s Sex Life is a 27-year-old man who masturbated for the first time when he was 22. He talks about the transition from saving himself for marriage to just enjoying sex, and why he never considered masturbation till he started having sex.

Recommended Quizzes

April 14, 2020

Every friend group consists of very different and specific characters — from the parent to the fun one — and it can be a little tough figuring out where you fall. So, we’ve created a quiz that lets you know exactly what kind of friend you are. Take to find out:

November 11, 2019

Today, we are going to be using your taste in music to determine how good you actually are in bed. All you need to do is create the ultimate Nigerian hit — from the lead artist to the producer — and we’ll tell you if all your partners leave satisfied, or if you are just […]

November 30, 2019

With No Nut November FINALLY coming to an end, we’ve decided to mark the torturous month with some more horny content. After quizzes that guessed how many people you’ve slept with, how good you are in bed and who you’ll sleep with next, this one will guess when next you’ll get lucky. Take it to […]

November 14, 2019

The fourth season of Big Brother Naija came to an end over a month ago, but the conversation surrounding the housemates is far from over. So, in a bid to keep the fire burning, we decided to create a quiz that tells you which famous member of the ‘Pepper Dem’ gang is your soulmate. Take […]

October 10, 2019

2019 is certainly Burna Boy’s year, but, if we are being honest, so was 2018. Since his transcendent mixtape, Outside, the afro-fusion star has refused to get his foot of our necks — dropping a string of fantastic singles and then capping it all off with his career-best album, African Giant.  So, in a bid […]

June 14, 2020

Have you ever been with someone so horrible that you swore to never date again? Yes? Well, do you know that one or more of your exes probably feels the same way about you? You never thought about that, huh? Thankfully, this quiz is here to let you know just how much of a hassle […]

More from Inside Life

May 20, 2022

Nobody will pass off a chance to win an all-expense-paid trip to KENYA with the winner of Nigerian Idol Season 7. So if you are still thinking, dreaming, waiting, or thinking you have enough time, then you are wasting time because this promo is ending on the 7th of June. Do we have your attention? Here’s […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X