Red flags are everywhere when it comes to relationships and dating. Some people spot it on time and run away, but others either don’t see them or ignore the red flags until it’s too late. These Nigerian men are the latter: they spotted red flags early in their relationships and still stayed.
Now, they’re sharing their experiences.
“My girl flirting with other guys keeps me on my toes”
— Aliyu, 30
When I met my girlfriend, she was with another man. The way she kept flirting with me and laughing, I thought she was single. Long story short, I “stole” her from the other guy. Now that we’re together, she’s constantly flirting with every bearded guy she meets but honestly, it’s not a problem for me.
I thrive well in the face of competition. Knowing I’m dating a girl who can leave me anytime has put me on my toes. From the sex to the dates and how I treat her, I’m always looking to impress my girlfriend. We’ve been together for three years, so I guess it’s working.
“I’m learning to live with my girl’s shitty music taste”
— Daniel, 25
My girlfriend’s favourite song is Harlem Shake. I don’t think I’ve met anyone with a worse taste in music than her. Bad music might not look like a red flag to other people, but music is an important part of my life — it’s how I try to figure out the world.
I’ve tried to put her on to good music, but she’s set in her ways, and now I have to spend the rest of my life listening to Pitbull and Paris Hilton.
“I think my girlfriend has a spiritual problem”
— Fidelis, 28
There’s a popular trope about women never knowing what they want to eat, but my girlfriend is the worst. On our first date, this babe spent about 30 minutes with the waiter trying to figure out what she wanted to order. After all the serenre, she still ate from my plate. Ma’am, you’re just getting to know me!
I ignored that red flag, and since we started dating, I don’t think this babe has confidently opened her mouth to order food. These days I order for both of us. If she doesn’t like it, she can soak garri or make Indomie.
“I’m dating someone obsessed with Instagram likes”
— Tobi, 39
I should’ve figured out my girlfriend was obsessed with social media when she deleted a picture we took together because of “lack of engagement”. As someone who generally doesn’t care for social media, I’ve always wondered why she went through so much trouble to win people’s approval, especially when she hasn’t met most of them.
We had a big fight about it and broke up about a year ago, but I realised my life without her was like eating plain white rice without any sauce. We’re back together, and I’m slowly learning to adapt to my life with her.
“My girlfriend is a thief, but I’m a thief too, so it’s fair”
— Hakeem, 24
The first time I invited my girlfriend over to spend the night, she stole my hoodie and sweatpants. I didn’t take it seriously at the time because I know stealing men’s clothes is what women do. But every time this babe comes, she always takes one shirts — even my trousers! The annoying thing is, she doesn’t allow me to wear my own clothes after she’s worn them.
Because I refuse to be cheated, I’ve started using her skincare products too. If you can steal my Fear of God hoodie, I will use your Skinceutical Vitamin C face serum as a hand cream. The bible says an eye for an eye.
“My girlfriend is passive-aggressive”
— Ikenna, 33
The biggest problem in my relationship is that my girlfriend and I never fight. We don’t even argue. Whenever something goes wrong, she gives me the silent treatment. It has been like that since we started dating, but I thought it was because she didn’t know me then. Eight months into our relationship now and nothing has changed.
I love her so much, and I’ve spoken to her about seeing a therapist. Hopefully, she agrees. I don’t know how long I can use my love for her as a blanket over this huge character flaw.