I’m in my early 20s, but I still see myself as a child. I used to think all early 20s folks see themselves this way, but I’m beginning to realise there aren’t too many of us on that boat. 

I graduated from the university in 2019, and with each passing month, my old primary, secondary school and university classmates are taking the huge step of getting married and/or having kids. 


What’s even crazier is it’s the folks who swore that love is a scam that are the first to go.

You could be on the street, and John Bosco who promised to become a Catholic priest would drive by in his Sienna with his two kids. Love really has a way of changing your plans.


I can’t even imagine having a kid right now. So of course, I’m concerned by the level of work social media puts into making babies look like angels

I’m a child myself. Having my own child right now is a recipe for disaster. I’d get angry over the stupidest things.


Kids are really expensive too. I’m sorry, but if I’m going to spend that much money on something, I should be getting some kind of ROI.


I really admire those who are starting families anyway. It takes a lot to believe in a cause so completely to devote your entire life to it. 


I’m not ready for that kind of responsibility yet. Imagine being responsible for people who aren’t me. I’m barely responsible for myself. Marriage is so scary and final. I know divorce exists, but I don’t think anyone goes into marriage with the intention of divorcing later. What’s especially scary is the fact that people change and there’s nothing you can do about it. Even I know that I wasn’t the same person I was a few years ago. 

The patience that marriage requires doesn’t sound like something I have yet. I’ll have to be completely accountable to another person. I can’t just decide to go on a trip or make a big purchase. It’s bondage, but I’d be deeply in love with the person I’m in bondage with.


I hope I get married someday — definitely not today — but till then, I’ll write articles and make sure every hot babe knows about HERtitude. You too can get your tickets here.



Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.