7 Sexual Practices Nigerians Should Never Indulge In

November 7, 2021

If you are Nigerian, then you will understand what we mean when we say some things are just not for us. Some of these things are sexual practices that are just not aligned with our Nigerian-ness. Here is a list of some of them:

1. Toe sucking

You are a Nigerian and you want to suck your partner’s toes? Are you not afraid of the miles they have travelled? Are you not scared of how tough the soles of their feet will be? Imagine sucking the toes of someone from Igando or Ikorodu. God abeg.

2. Eating a man’s ass.

So you became so horny that you decided, out of plain fornication and the romantic gesture of bumping genitals, that you want to eat bumbum. And I’m not mad at it. I admire the courage. But then it’s not just any ass, it is the one owned by a Nigerian man you want to chook your mouth in and eat? Do you have a death wish? Is that how you have chosen to go?

9 Reasons Why Nigerian Men Must Never Wash Their Bum-Bum

3. Bondage.

7 Nigerians Talk About Times They Experienced Miracles | Zikoko!

The Nigerian in me would never do this. The moment I hear, “Let me put you in bondage,” my Christianity will resurrect and I’ll start speaking in tongues and shouting, “I shall not be put in bondage. My destiny shall never experience bondage. Everything that belongs to me shall never be bound. Rikabasunbatatatata.”

4. Fisting.

If you don’t know what this is, Google it. But here’s a simpler way to put it: imagine someone putting their entire hand inside your honeypot, their entire hand oh, and not their weapon of love. Imagine them bending you over and putting that complete hand, from palm to wrist to elbow, inside you. Just imagine. JUST. IMAGINE.

5. Public sex.

Many people are doing this, sha. But one day will be one day when you will be caught and we will do GoFundMe to bail you out. Imagine your pastor coming to bail you out and they ask you what you were arrested for: “Collecting hot fok in public.”

6. Pissing.

69 Drawing Of Pissing Man Illustrations & Clip Art - iStock

Somebody’s child that you are, you will kneel down and open your mouth or spread yourself like moi-moi leaf, only for someone to remove their weapon of love and expel hot urine all over you. Hot yellow urine, in this Nigeria where everything is hot.

7. Scat.

7 Things You Should Be Warned About Before You Travel Abroad | Zikoko!

Here’s how Google defines it:

“In sexual fetishism, scatology (usually abbreviated scat) refers to coprophilia, when a person is sexually aroused by fecal matter, whether in the use of feces in various sexual acts, watching someone defecating, or simply seeing the feces. Entire subcultures in sexuality are devoted to this fetish.”

Is this what you want to indulge in? Be honest and answer yourself.

But we are not judging sha. Do what you want and have fun. Just stay safe.

Zikoko Donation Banner

Help Zikoko keep making the content you love

More than ever, people are turning to Zikoko for stories that matter and content they love. But still, we, like many media organisations, are feeling the financial heat of these times. If you find us valuable, please make a contribution to help keep Zikoko zikoko-ing.

Thank you for your support.

We are also cool with Crypto.

Donation Close
Zikoko Logo

Complete Your Commitment

Donation confirm

Your Contribution is confirmed! Amount

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

March 24, 2020

While we know that a lot of the best Nigerian artists deservedly have fans across generations, that won’t stop us from attempting to guess how old you are based on your taste in Nigerian music. So, take this quiz to see if we got it right:

November 11, 2019

Today, we are going to be using your taste in music to determine how good you actually are in bed. All you need to do is create the ultimate Nigerian hit — from the lead artist to the producer — and we’ll tell you if all your partners leave satisfied, or if you are just […]

November 12, 2019

Are you a single pringle, stuck in a complicated situationship or happily married to the love of your life? This quiz is here to guess your current relationship status, and as you know, Zikoko quizzes are incredibly accurate (don’t quote us). So, give a shot:

More from Inside Life

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X