Using dating apps is a total gamble and a humbling experience. If you ever plan on downloading a dating app, here are 8 types of men you will find there. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.
1. The one that is serious about marriage
This man is there for one reason only: to find a wife. His bio tells you immediately — Richard 34, Christian, doesn’t drink or smoke, is conservative (in Nigeria?), wants kids, works at a good job, followed by three pictures of him in the same outfit and one either at his office, with his mum or his nephews. Of all the types of guys you’d find on dating apps, he is surprisingly the least annoying.
2. The one that is there for good vibes
This guy is not there for anything serious, he goes straight to the point and tells you that he wants to hook up soon. if it’s a no, he immediately blocks you, no time to waste time and you should be happy because he is definitely a creative. Honestly, everyone should aspire to perspire to be as honest as he is. He is here for a good time, not a long time and that itself is a fine art to master.
3. The one that thinks he is on 2go
His name is something silly like Mr Pwesh23. He kills every conversation you try to have with him with his one-worded replies and answers simple questions in the most stupid ways for someone that has “If you are boring, swipe left” in his bio. If you see this guy and you will, do yourself a favour and avoid him because next thing you know, he’d want to hook up.
4. The one that tells you nothing about himself
Yes boo, give us nothing. You’d be lucky if he has pictures of himself at all, and when he does, it won’t be clear. As for his bio? It’ll be empty. You’d find yourself wondering if he created a profile by mistake, he almost makes the 2go guy look good.
5. The travel agent
You can’t tell if this guy is doing yahoo or if he’s just rich and likes travelling a lot. He has the flags of every single country he has ever visited in his bio, and he’s always looking to meet people in whatever new city he finds himself in. In his bio, he lets you know that what he wants in a partner is someone willing to travel the world with him.
6. The one that got away
There’s no better way to describe this guy, his bio is unproblematic, he is gorgeous and has values and ideals that match with yours but your brain and fingers have other plans and now you swiped left and you might never see him again, pele.
7. The sugar daddy
He immediately lets you know that he wants to take care of you and spoil you, he also talks about how much he likes sex so that you know that he isn’t looking for a second wife. Unlike the one that is looking for marriage, he doesn’t add pictures of his wife and kids, and whatever age he puts in his bio, you should add 10 to it.
8. The one that is on a dating app looking for friends
The worst thing about meeting shitty guys on dating apps are these types of guys. He genuinely isn’t looking for a relationship at all but the problem is, he is one of the very few decent ones on the app, at least you found a friend so maybe that’s something.
9. The fitness instructor
It can only go two ways with this guy, he either has pictures of his abs everywhere or enough fitness motivational quotes in his bio to rival a yahoo boy. This guy only has pictures of himself at the gym and works at self-employed. If you are lucky, there will be a shirtless mirror selfie for you to look at.
10. The yahoo boy
These guys win the championship cup as the worst types of guys on dating apps, mostly because they are there to catfish. Sure there’s a white guy called Greg Chapman that finished from Harvard but is living in Oshodi or Becca who is a flight attendant that lives in Shomolu. One point for the ridiculous lies sha. E for effort.
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