Dating apps | Zikoko!

Trigger Warning: This article contains sensitive topics, including physical assault and sexual abuse, which some readers may find distressing. Reader discretion is advised

Dating apps promise easy access to love, but for many Nigerians, the reality is far less romantic than chaotic.

We recently spoke to five Nigerians, and their experiences are chilling, to say the least. They share how swiping right has led to awkward encounters, and in some cases, actual danger.

“I found out I was catfished after two months together” — Mary*, 31

After a string of disappointing encounters on dating apps, Mary* thought she’d finally found ‘the one’. But when they met in person, all she knew was a lie.

“In January last year, I moved to a new city. I didn’t know anyone, lived alone, and worked remotely, so it was hard to meet people. The only place I could really socialise was church, but that wasn’t working either. By May, I decided to give Bumble a shot since it was pretty popular.

I wanted a Christian man and only looked for people with similar religious values. The first guy I matched didn’t click, and the second sent a dick pic barely two minutes into the conversation. I blocked him immediately, and that was my cue to delete the app.

After Bumble, I turned to Christian dating apps, but they didn’t help; most were dormant, expensive, or didn’t cater to Nigerians. In July, I got lucky and found an app called Raya. It wasn’t Christian-based, but it looked legit and seemed good for networking. That’s where I met Fred*.

Fred was the co-founder of a financial investment startup, and I verified this online with his pictures. We texted and had voice calls, and he never said anything inappropriate. I liked him and wanted us to meet in person by the second week, but he said he was travelling.

We kept talking, and by September, we finally made plans to meet at a restaurant in Ikeja City Mall. I got there, looked around, and couldn’t find him. Then I got a phone call and a short, bald man started waving at me. I was confused. The Fred I had been talking to was tall and light-skinned. That’s when it hit me: I’d been catfished.

I confronted him immediately, and he had the nerve to say he only used the photos because he knew I wouldn’t have agreed otherwise. He said I’d fallen for the person he was, just not the body. If I wasn’t shallow or a gold digger, I’d understand and stay. I was speechless. I just walked out and never looked back. I deleted all my dating apps that day.”

“They robbed me, beat me and threatened to out me” — King*, 29

King* assumed dating apps would be a safe space to explore his sexuality. Until a violent encounter nearly cost his life.

“My friends suggested dating apps when I told them I was looking to meet new people. I had just started embracing the fact that I liked men, and it helped that I had a few queer friends who made the process less lonely. Tinder seemed the best option since it was popular and they had good experiences. I met some people there, but the one who stood out was William*. We’d talked for a few weeks, and things went smoothly. One afternoon, he texted saying he was working from home and would love to hang out. I agreed. We planned to meet at Shoprite, and after walking around a bit, he suggested we return to his place.

He hailed a bike and we headed to a part of Abuja I wasn’t familiar with. When we arrived at his place, he told me to go into the compound while he locked the gate and sorted payment for the ride.

I stepped inside and found several men already waiting. Before I could fully register what was happening, they rushed me and beat me to a pulp. Then locked me in a room.

I had over ₦1.2m in my bank accounts, and they emptied everything. They forced me to call my family and friends for more. I had to lie that I was stranded and needed urgent money. I sounded calm on the calls because they threatened to kill me if I raised alarm. Once they drained all they could, they took my phone and tortured me for hours. They eventually gave me ₦1k and dropped me off at the express to find my way home.

I told my friends what happened, but I didn’t go to the police. The men threatened to out me if I reported, and I knew the police couldn’t be trusted either. We got some lawyers and activists involved, but the case eventually went cold. It’s been nearly three months.

That experience didn’t just traumatise me, it made me painfully aware of how unsafe it is to exist as a queer person in Nigeria. I haven’t been on a dating app since.”

“He planned a threesome for our first date” — Jola*, 23

In Jola’s* case, what was meant to be a casual hangout left her questioning how easily safety and consent can be brushed aside on dating apps, especially when sex becomes the assumed end goal.

“I was on holiday in the US for a few months and thought it would be a good chance to meet new people, so I signed up on Tinder and Hinge. I wasn’t expecting much, but I stayed open to seeing where it’d go.

Out of all the matches I got, I only met about two or three people in person. I was extra cautious because of security concerns. America has its fair share of crazy, and I didn’t want to end up in a dangerous situation.

I matched with Todd*, who seemed cool at first. After chatting for a few days, we agreed to meet at the beach around 7 p.m. I was with a friend that day, and when I mentioned it, he said she could come along since his friends would also be there. It seemed casual enough.

At first, I thought it was a good idea, especially since I wouldn’t be going alone. But then Todd started texting nonstop. He wanted to know where I was and checked in repeatedly. It felt too eager, and I think that was when I should have suspected he was up to no good. On our way to the beach, Todd casually mentioned that he had planned a threesome for us with his friends.

I was so stunned I never gave him the impression that we were meeting to hook up, so that was a weird card to pull out of the blue. I was just grateful I hadn’t gotten there yet. With the way he acted, I could only imagine what could have happened. We might have been raped.

Anyway, that was my cue to block him and stop meeting other people. Most of the guys I matched were just horny or shallow, and I was never attracted to any. It just wasn’t worth it.”

“He wanted to use me to pimp black men” — Fatima*, 27

Fatima* thought she was easing into a new connection that could become something more; until things took a sharp, confusing turn.

“I was single, and some friends encouraged me to try Tinder. I wasn’t expecting much, but I figured, why not? I matched with this guy, and we took the conversation to WhatsApp. We chatted for almost a month. Everything seemed fine, and he seemed genuinely interested. But when it came down to actually meeting up, I got cold feet and ghosted him.

I then decided it might be best to try a foreigner since I won’t be pressured to meet immediately. I matched with Aman* and we got talking. We got along pretty well at first, until he told me he was on Tinder because he wanted a black man to have sex with. He befriended me because he thought I could help him find one. It was weird. Why match with me at all? Why waste my time pretending to be into me?

Even after I called him out, he kept texting and pestering me about it. I eventually blocked him. That experience left a bad taste in my mouth. I haven’t made any meaningful connections on the app since then, and now I’m more careful about the people I match with. People are wild.”

“I found out she was still talking to other men, and even hooking up with them” — Lawal*, 25

After one connection that seemed promising turned out to be anything but, Lawal* found himself dealing with unexpected heartbreak

“I joined Bumble in 2022 because traditional dating just wasn’t working, but the app wasn’t any better. Most of the women I matched with wanted hookups and couldn’t even communicate clearly. It was frustrating. Even when I connected with someone, they were usually too far away for anything to happen.

The only person I met was Ella*. We matched because she was nearby, and I liked her vibe. Ella came across as someone who wanted a real connection and was genuinely interested in me. We had similar interests, hung out often, and had a good time together.

Eventually, I caught the love bug. I’m a lover boy at heart, so I told her how I felt. She said she felt the same, but for some reason, she didn’t delete her Bumble account. That didn’t sit right with me, but I ignored it.

Months later, one of my friends who knew about her matched with her on the same app. That’s how I found out she was still talking to other men, and even hooking up with them. When I confronted her, she said she never agreed to be exclusive.

It really broke me and my feelings for her died after that. I’d joined the app hoping to find something meaningful, but what I got was just another heartbreak. We cut contact for a while, but later reconnected, and it became a casual fling. Since Ella, I don’t think I’ve felt real emotions for any woman. The whole experience left me jaded.”

If you want to share your own story, I’d love to hear it here.

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*Fikayo, 22, thought dating apps would be a harmless way to meet people — maybe even find love someday. Instead, what started as casual talking stages spiralled into flings, endless choices, and a cycle of emotional emptiness she’s still trying to heal from.

In this story, she shares how Bumble fed her insecurities, why validation became addictive, and the moment she knew she had to walk away and start over.

This is Fikayo’s story as told to Adeyinka

Before I ever downloaded a dating app, I was just a shy girl trying to survive university life in Benin Republic. I didn’t have much of a social life — no parties, no cliques, not even many friends. I was always indoors, buried in books, moving between my classes and the hostel. Dating wasn’t even something I thought much about.

One day, someone suggested Tinder. I was almost 18 and bored out of my mind, so I thought, why not? The excitement hit immediately. I loved chatting with different people, even if I wasn’t meeting anyone physically. It made me feel less isolated.

But it didn’t last long. I got banned after a while, probably because one of the talking stages reported me for being underage. No matter how many new accounts I tried to open, Tinder wouldn’t let me back. Their system flagged my device. It stung at the time, but it led me somewhere else.

One random afternoon, while scrolling through the App Store, I found Bumble. It came up as a suggestion after Tinder. I downloaded it out of pure boredom, curious to see what it was about. That was how my Bumble journey began.

Initially, I wasn’t meeting anyone in person. I was back in Lagos for my industrial training and still living a very introverted life. I started chatting with a guy from Lekki, and we got along well. We had planned to meet, but due to my work schedule and general busyness, it never happened. Eventually, he stopped replying to my messages. When I asked if I’d done anything wrong, he just ignored me.

I returned to Benin Republic after completing my training. Sometime later, the Lekki guy finally responded and explained that he had pulled away because I was too young — I was 18, while he was 30 — and because it was clear we weren’t going to meet.

Back in Benin Republic, I jumped right back on Bumble. This time, I was determined to meet people in person.

And I did — a lot of them.

There was a wild period when I was casually dating several Beninese men. Some of them couldn’t even speak English properly, but that didn’t stop me. We’d use Google Translate to have conversations, laughing awkwardly over miscommunications and trying to bridge the gap.

In hindsight, it was crazy — building casual flings with people I could barely understand. But in those moments, I didn’t care. I was young, free, and knew I wasn’t staying long in the country. I wasn’t looking for anything serious. It was about the experiences.

When I graduated and returned to Lagos, I deleted Bumble for the first time. I had gotten into a long-distance relationship and didn’t want any distractions. But eight months later, the relationship crashed, and I found my way back to Bumble.

This time, it was different.

I had gotten a place to stay on the Island for NYSC, and meeting people became ridiculously easy. I was meeting three, sometimes four, different guys every week. If we vibed online, we met. If we met, there was almost always intimacy. It got so bad that at one point, I couldn’t even tell you what my body count was anymore.

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Sometimes I met guys who weren’t my type, and it was easy to move on because there were always more options. Other times, I’d meet a guy who was exactly my type — rich, tall, good-looking — and still move on because neither of us was looking for attachment. I wasn’t looking for love, I just enjoyed the thrill.

After a while, though, it started to eat at me. I realised I had built an unhealthy mindset: If anyone showed a flaw or did something I didn’t like, I instantly told myself there were hundreds of better people out there. The sea of options on Bumble made me impatient and unrealistic about people. Relationships began to seem disposable.

And then there were the scary parts. One day, I met a guy off Bumble. We decided to have a movie date indoors. I wasn’t worried because I was on my period and didn’t expect anything to happen. But halfway through, he tried to force himself on me. I had to scream and fight him off before he stopped and started begging. I left his house feeling disgusted, scared, and deeply ashamed.

That night, I told myself something needed to change.

I didn’t delete Bumble immediately. I was too addicted to the excitement, the easy company. But I became stricter with my rules: no more meeting people immediately. At least two weeks of chatting before any physical meetup. No more indoor meetings either.

Still, even with stricter rules, the cycle continued. I’d meet someone, we’d hit it off, a week later, they’d vanish, and I’d move on to the next. It felt endless, like I was stuck in a loop I didn’t know how to break.

Eventually, I deleted the app for real. Since then, I haven’t spoken to anyone new. No talking stages, no casual hook-ups, and for the first time in years, I feel at peace.

Looking back now, I understand why I threw myself so deeply into Bumble and those endless talking stages. I’ve always been a little chubby, and from a young age, people made me feel like I wasn’t enough. Like slim girls were the ones who got chosen first, while people like me just had to manage. That narrative stuck with me longer than I realised.

However, on Bumble, the story took a different turn. Suddenly, it was rich guys, handsome guys, gym bros — all giving me attention, choosing me, chasing me. And not just virtually. Even when we met in person, the energy remained the same. It was like every insecurity I’d grown up with was being wiped away, one match at a time.

I wasn’t settling. I was being desired by the exact kind of people I thought were out of reach. And for a long time, that made me feel powerful. But power built on endless validation doesn’t last. Eventually, it left me feeling empty. Like I was always searching for something more, like no one was ever enough.

Today, I’m trying to rewrite that story.

I’m celibate now — three months and counting. I’m learning to lean on God, to lean into friendships that don’t come with ulterior motives, and to find fulfillment outside of who’s texting or matching with me.

It’s not always easy. There are days when I miss the thrill of it all. Days when loneliness creeps in. But I remind myself why I started this journey, why I needed to pause and heal before trying to love anyone else.

I want to get married within the next two years. I genuinely believe I’m capable of a long-term commitment. But this time, I’m preparing the version of myself who can build something healthy, not the girl constantly looking for new faces to fill a space.

For now, I’m holding on to my peace, my growth, and a quiet kind of happiness I haven’t felt in a very long time.

READ THIS TOO: We Broke Up, But Still Make Love Like Soulmates

Call us greedy, call us Oliver Twists, but over here, we believe whatever’s worth doing is worth doing well. LinkedIn might be a great career platform to access jobs and journal your achievements for the world to see, but we need them to pull on their big boy pants and realise it’s also the perfect dating app in the making.

Who really needs to know their potential partner’s height, beliefs and drug habits when with LinkedIn, you can find out if they’re a team player, great at communication or a top earner in their field. Here’s how to find the love of your life on the most professional app in existence.

Send a cold DM

As soon as you’ve scoured the app and found upward moving people to connect and lock lips with, slide right into their DMs like you would on Twitter.

Be the clown you are

Nothing’s funny right now, but how do you expect to find the love of your life on an app as serious as LinkedIn if you can’t even dangle the promise of bringing joy and laughter into their lives?

Spin tales

We know you’ve seen the tales by office lamp people tell on LinkedIn. The people spinning those tales don’t have two heads. Give yours a romantic twist and you’re all set.

Be in the comments

Believe it or not, you’re interviewing for the role of their Biggest Cheerleader, and they’ll need to know you’re a serious applicant. The only way to do this is to get your digital finger foam and reply all their tales with “Deep”, “Insightful”, “Such a pioneer” and more.

Work on your elevator pitch

Or as we like to call it in dating, flirting. You’ve sent cold DMs, and you’ve tarried in the comments. Don’t let all your effort go to waste simply because there’s nothing sweet about “You’re the sugar in my tea”.

Go through their recommendations

You can tell a lot about a person from the way their coworker (from that one internship they did in uni) speaks of them. Do they work like tomorrow will never come? Are they cultist aspirants who like their coffee black?

Take it to the streets

This just might be the most important of all. The connection you have online might be great, but what happens when you meet and they don’t look at you like the moon and stars shine out your eyeballs? What then?

If LinkedIn isn’t for you, that’s fine, we also know: How to Get Into a Relationship From the Comfort of Your Home

Since your chances of finding boo in a typical Nollywood boy-jams-girl-on-the-road-and-they-fall-in-love style is practically zero (because you’ll never actually leave your house), you might as well make sure your online dating game is watertight.

Add these conversation starters to your arsenal and thank me with anything — except puff-puff, ew.

“Let’s hate Nigeria together”

A mutual dislike for Nigeria + japa plans = Happily ever after.

“What’s the worst opening line you’ve ever received?”

This could be a fun way to start a conversation around bizarre opening lines, plus you also get expo on things they don’t want to hear. PS: This may only work if the receiver already likes you.

“Send me your account number”

You must have seen this coming. What better way is there to catch someone’s attention? But be careful o. If you try this without any money in your account, sorry is your name.

“If you could change cities, where would you go?”

Bonus points if they live in Lagos, because they’ll definitely be traumatised and ready to unload all the ways the city is killing them.

“Are you fuel? ‘Cause your type is hard to find”

They’ll either find you funny and want to keep talking or they’ll air you till infinity.

Obi or Tinubu?

Use this for the ones that put “sapiosexual” on their bio. They’re the ones looking for stimulating conversation.

“I want to free you from capitalism”

It’s lowkey giving “come and be a house husband/wife” but at this point in my life, even I am open to it. Take care of me, boo.

“Wizkid’s Made in Lagos didn’t deserve album of the year”

Tell them that the Headies made a mistake and they’ll either come violently for you or agree with you. Either way, you’ll get a response and you can tell them how much you want to suck face with them.

“Plantain is bottom-barrel”

Again, a terrible opinion but it’ll catch attention because they’ll want to know why you have such rubbish taste.

“I have a Canadian passport”

They’re sure to reply with, “Let’s get married.”

NEXT READ: Seven Types of Women Men Should Never Date

Modern problems require modern solutions, and that’s why dating apps were born. To give people a chance to find love from the comfort of their homes. So, how then do you make sure you have the perfect profile on these dating apps?

Put your best foot forward

It’s a dating app and you’re trying to make a good impression, one that’s good enough to make a potential partner swipe right and start a conversation. Your first picture should be one that emphasises and showcases your best features.

Add enough pictures but never too much

Even if we’re shallow people, we don’t want to come off as too shallow. So put enough pictures, but never too much. You want to show that you’re confident in your looks but not obsessed. If you’re the maximum limit for pictures is 6, add 4. If the max is 4, add 3. Balance, baby.

Never put pictures of you with multiple people

Under no circumstance should you include pictures with other people in it. Nobody wants to swipe right and the first question they ask is, “Which one are you?” Let them know from the jump what they’re getting into.

Your pictures should showcase different aspects of your personality

If you listed in your bio that you like to travel, post a picture of you in a place you travelled to. It helps to strike up a conversation and really sells the whole “I am adventurous” vibe.

Add information to your profile

Don’t be one of those people that only post pictures and hope their fine face sells it. People won’t date a pretty face forever. Add things about yourself because it also helps you weed out the foolish people. At least you can guess your matches probably have somewhat similar beliefs and values.

Give people something to start a conversation with

Add things to your bio that can be interesting conversation starters. Favourite movie? Something you like to do? At least that way, you’re giving people a chance to start the conversation with something other than “hey”.

Ask a friend to go over it

Your friends know a lot about you, so once you’ve finished adding all the necessary information to your dating profile, ask a friend who you trust to go over it. Let them be your second eyes and help you point out things you might have missed or things that may need adjusting.

No matter how old you are, navigating the ups and downs of dating apps can be quite the chore. From endless swiping to the high likelihood of being catfished — and then the conversations that eventually go to die on WhatsApp — not a lot of people make it past the getting-to-know-you phase on the app. So when these 40+ men told us they actually found love on dating apps in the year of Beyoncé 2022, you know we had to get the full gist.

“I didn’t think I’d find someone my age” — Dapo, 45

I met my girlfriend almost a year ago, after being on Tinder for about five months. My 17 year-old daughter had bullied me into signing upon the app as I’d been single since we lost her mum in 2009. I thought it was a funny app and I was judgmental of the people there because I just thought it reeked of desperation. However, all of this changed when I met Toyin, my girlfriend. She’s only a year younger than me and the best thing to have happened to me in such a long time. Would we have met randomly on the streets of Lagos? Well, we’ll never know now. But I’m so happy I took that leap of faith even though I was skeptical at first. It’s been a year and I don’t regret a thing. Let me tell you something: love is sweet.

“I was just looking for a good time and now I’m in a romantic one-chance” — Sheriff, 40

A relationship was the last thing on my mind when I came back to Nigeria for the holidays a few months ago. I’d been on dating apps for a while and for me, it was all about the sex — good time, not a long time. In Philadelphia, it worked well for me, so I thought I’d just do the same and have a bit of fun in Nigeria. That’s how I got here, opened a dating app and matched up with this babe in like a week. We met up for drinks and then I found myself hanging out with her every day after that. Imagine? All my Detty December plans in the mud because of a woman.

I don’t regret it though, she makes me so happy and I can’t imagine my life without her. I was supposed to go back in January, but my work is remote so I’m still here. I’ll have to go at some point, but for now, I’m happy and in love.

“My children and I give each other relationship advice” — Victor, 41

I met my girlfriend Pat about three years ago, in 2019. I’d been through a messy divorce just two years prior and I was scared to put myself out there again. Plus, my two boys moved in with me after their mum left the country. Deep down, I just wanted them to view me as a responsible single father, and I felt going on multiple dates would taint that image. After saying no to many matchmaking attempts from family, my younger brother convinced me to sign up for a dating app. Swiping left was difficult for me because I thought it was rude, but over time I got over it.

I met Pat around June that year and by the time the 2020 lockdowns started, we were living together. She gets me in a way that allows me to have space and just exist as my own individual. I love that; I needed that. My sons are dating as well and we have a group chat where we just talk about our relationship issues and try to figure out solutions.

“I’ve never been happier or more settled. He feels like home.” — Bassey, 45

Dating apps for queer people can be really tricky. We all know it’s dangerous because you could easily get tricked, harassed, extorted or worse, killed. But deep down, for most of us, it helps us deal with loneliness. I met my man on a popular queer hookup app. At the time, I was looking for sex, so we just became fuck buddies. People claim that catching feelings for your fuck buddy is common, but Jide wasn’t my first, so I don’t even know how it happened. We moved from sex to conversations to dates, and now we live together. I never saw myself as one of the commitment gays, but here I am in love and fully committed to one man. The funniest part is if he proposes today, I’ll probably say yes even though I know it’s not feasible .

“We work together, but we also met on a dating app” — Uzo, 43

My girlfriend and I currently work together, but we initially met on Tinder. I joined the app as a joke a while ago, but one thing led to another and I met this girl who just blew me away. I didn’t think it was going to be anything, I mean she’s like eight years younger than me and we have totally different interests, but something about the way we could talk for hours (I hate calls) pushed me to explore the potential. While figuring this out, her company acquired mine and now we’re colleagues. No one knows yet and that makes it even sexier. Are we in love? I don’t know. But I know we’re on a journey towards it and I’m so excited.

So you’ve decided to give dating apps a try; created your profile, added a bio and uploaded a flattering picture. Great. Maybe you can finally meet the love of your life after all.

Or not, depending on how great your conversation game is.

The koko is that if you don’t want to be unfortunate and get blocked faster than you can say “Ah”, then avoid these opening lines. They’re the ABSOLUTE WORST.

1. “Wyd?”

You couldn’t even bother to type in full. Haba. Please and please, you should only be sending this if you’re Bruno Mars.

2. “Hi, hey, hello, hai”

This is the laziest attempt ever. What is the person supposed to do with those?

3. “Can I know you?”

Just block yourself, because what is this? If e easy do am.

4. Anything that starts with “Am”

If the opening line starts with “Am”, forget you even matched.

5. “How are you?”

And all its variations. Except you want to go on a boring how-are-you-fine cycle, erase this question from your options.

6. “Wassup” or “Waxup”

Omo, the sky. Out of the hundred things you could start with, you choose this?

7. Emojis

Talk to the person direct, don’t go through emojis. Mind you, sending a smiley as your first message is outright creepy.

8. “Hi beautiful”

Later you’ll be wondering why you got aired. Dead the idea of “Hi dear” too. Both of them suck.

9. “Are you a lightbulb because I want to turn you on”

Okay, this is just a cheesy line no one will fall for. Try harder.

10. “Follow me on social media”

Why this? Don’t you know where they sell Instagram, Twitter or Snapchat followers?

11. “Sweet girl”

It’s you that’s bitter? This gives serious creepy uncle vibes.

12. “Where are you chatting from?”

The top of a tree. You’re just prying unnecessarily. If the convo kicks off, best believe they’d tell you eventually. Be calming down.

13. “Nice dp”

You probably repeat that to everyone you DM. Maybe, up your game?

14. “You look familiar”

Yes, because you’ve seen them like…NEVER. Even if you have seen them somewhere before, ehen? Tch.

15. “Can we meet up”

Come oh, before you type this as an opening line to someone you clearly do not know, dead the idea.

16. “I like you”

You don’t say. Blockedt.

I had heard a lot of things about dating sites in Nigeria, so I joined six of them for this article. Turns out that they’re alright. While these aren’t Christian dating sites, if you’re an ardent believer, they fit the bill for most people.

All apps listed are LGBT friendly, but remember to stay safe.

1. Tinder

Tinder is by far one of the most popular dating platforms not just in Nigeria, but in the world. Although Tinder is a dating app, it is also a good place to find friends.

Signing up is pretty easy. All you have to do is download the app and fill in everything they ask for. You need to upload at least 2 photographs.

When picking a name, think properly because you can’t change it. Either that or I just couldn’t figure out how to change my name.

There is this wonderful feature that basically makes you invisible to numbers you’ve blocked on your phone.

You swipe right on people you like and left on those you don’t. In case you don’t like swiping, there are icons at the bottom for yes and no. Swiping is more fun though.

If someone you swipe right on swipes right on you too, it’s a match.

One of you has to message the other person within 24 hours or Tinder automatically unmatches you. If you mistakenly swipe the wrong thing on someone, you can go back to correct it, but if and only if you’re using the paid version of this app.

There’s a section to see who likes you, but you can’t view them unless you’re using the paid version.

You can make your location and gender invisible, but only if you pay. It seems there a quite a number of things you can’t do if you don’t pay.

Some people have blue ticks to show that they’re verified. That means they’re real people. Tinder didn’t make me go through any process to make sure the picture I used was really me – it wasn’t.

If you’re not feeling a match anymore, you can unmatch them. If they turn out to be super creepy or something like that, you can unmatch and report.

You can always delete your Tinder profile if you’re tired of the app or if you’ve found someone. You also have the option to pause your profile. Pausing your profile means your profile becomes invisible to people that you’re not already matched with till you unpause it.

I know everyone has different experiences on Tinder, but the people I met were nice and respectful. After I told them I was just there for work, they didn’t mind because they were apparently on Tinder to make friends. Well, except the guy who understandably unmatched me shortly after.

2.Bumble

Bumble is a super cool app. It is one of the dating sites in Nigeria, and I first heard about it from two of my friends. Women have to make the first move here. If you’re a man, you can’t start a conversation with a babe you matched with unless she texts you. If she doesn’t text you within 24 hours, sorry.

It also uses the swipe right for yes and left for no method. You can SuperSwipe to “make a bold first move” whatever that means. Bumble’s words, not mine.

You can’t change your name here either, so think carefully before picking a name. You can also delete and start over, but that seems like stress. Like Tinder, there’s a place for people who like you and you have to pay to see them.

Bumble allows you to send pictures, videos, GIFs, and voice notes which I think is nice. You can also do a voice call or a video call. You can link your Instagram and Spotify to your Bumble profile too if you feel like.

There’s this question game for women that don’t know what to say to break the ice. You can either select one of their questions or type yours in, and you’ll guess the answer while waiting for them to answer.

You have to verify yourself here so you can’t pretend to be someone else, or you’re not supposed to be able to do that. You’ll be asked to take a picture and it has to match with your profile picture.

I was using my friend’s picture (with her permission of course), so I saw that and thought “The jig is up”. My dears, the jig was not up at all. It’s either I’m The Many-Faced God or that process is a sham because I finally got through after about four tries. Mind you, we look nothing alike.

You can unmatch people here too if you’re not feeling them anymore. You can also block and report other users, and you’re free to delete your account whenever you want. Their version of pause is snooze.

Bumble gives you tips on dealing with rejection, safety tips, etc. I honestly didn’t open them, but I think it’s great that they’re there.

There’s this thing where you set your COVID preferences that I forgot to screenshot before deleting the app. They’ll ask you if you want your first meeting to be virtual or physical and things like that. You’ll have to go and check the rest yourself please.

All in all, it’s a pretty decent app and a good place to connect with people whether romantically or otherwise. They just need to get a more solid verification process.

3.Badoo

I had known about this platform for years, but I had no idea it was a dating site until recently. Like the other dating apps, people are not just there for romance. Some people are there to make friends too.

Download the app, fill in what they ask for and you’re good to go. Badoo also uses the swipe right for yes and swipe left for no method. They have icons at the bottom too for people who would rather not swipe.

You can send someone a crush to “stand out”.

You can chat with someone else even if you’re not a match. I discovered this because I saw a message icon on some profiles, and I clicked it for four profiles. I was asked for credits to talk to two of them, and I was asked to upgrade to talk to one. I managed to message the last person without doing any of those. I have no idea how they decide who you can talk to for free and who you need to upgrade to talk to.

Badoo also has a question game thing like Bumble, but you can only choose from the questions they provide. You can send pictures, voice notes, and make video calls. I don’t have screenshots because you apparently can’t screenshot chats.

There’s a section to see who likes you, but you have to pay like the rest.

Badoo makes you verify yourself and I managed to pass this process even though I used another friend’s picture. Don’t worry, he said it was okay. You people I got through immediately. I know I kind of look like a guy, but come on.

It’s like they don’t want you to leave their app because they asked me 734 things before I could finally delete my account. I understand them wanting to make sure you don’t delete your account by mistake, but these people are actually trying to keep you there.

Apart from the almost hostage situation and the fact that I scaled through their verification process very easily, it appears to be a good app to connect with other people.

4. OkCupid

This app wants you to sign up using your Facebook account, although it also provides an option for you to sign up using other methods like your email address and phone number.

Once you’re done signing up, you then start to create a profile. The app takes you through requests like your name, age, location, and quite a number of options for nonbinary users.

Also, just so nobody wastes your time, the app allows you to specify what you’re looking for. So, if you’re looking for hookups, friendships, short-term dating, long-term relationships, or even non-monogamous relationships, you’re good.

You’ll also be providing a short self-summary, after which you’ll take a short quiz. Don’t vex, it’s not like Zikoko’s quizzes, but it’ll help you find love.

Finding people you like is also quite simple. There’s a section called double take, which is pretty much like Tinder’s swipe-right-or-left page. You swipe left to pass, and you swipe right to show your interest. The main difference here is that you don’t have to pay to undo a left swipe like you would on Tinder.

5. Zoosk

Zoosk is another dating app that’s quite popular around the world, and it works in Nigeria too. Here’s how it works: When you first log onto the app, you can decide to create an account with your email address, your Facebook account, or your google account. Unlike other sites, the good thing about Zoosk is that they’re not stressing your life with JAMB questions right from the start. Instead, you’ll only be filling out the things that are standard dating app info: Your name, age, location, preferences, and so on. They also make you pick a username sha. If you don’t know what to use, or you’re coming up with usernames like “AdeTiger”, they’ll give you one.

Another good thing about Zoosk is the fact that it offers profile verification, allowing you to ensure that you’re chatting with a real authentic person and not a bot or a catfish. If a profile is verified, you can easily tell by looking at the person’s profile. You’ll see a green check mark that indicates that this person has been photo-verified.

6. eHarmony

This app is actually kind of old but only recently started attracting attention among young people in Nigeria. The app is free to download and use, at least to a certain point. There’s also a paid version that costs about $60 but that’s none of your business because like Ayra Star said, love don’t cost a dime.

The only place you’ll taste small wahala is in the profile-building process. They seem to take the process of finding love more seriously because they know laziness is probably one of the things that made you look for a dating app in the first place.

After the normal name, email, and location questions you start to build your profile. A barrage of questions then appears at this point. First, eharmony asks you how many children you have followed by your age and religious affiliation. They won’t let you choose “Agnostic” or “Atheist” though. Instead, what you get is “Neither religious nor spiritual”.

After this, you move to the essay portion where you answer questions like “What do you like to do in your leisure time?”, or “What are the three things you’re thankful for?”. The funny part is that you can’t move on to the next stage without providing answers to these questions.

Free users can only view members who the app deems them most compatible with. If you want access to a wider range of matches, you have to subscribe. The free version also limits you to “favourite” -ing profiles, sending “Icebreaker” multiple choice questions, and seeing if you have any “mutual favourites” (people you’ve expressed interest in who have also signalled they are into you). To actually communicate with anyone, you have to pay up, which the app prompts you to do whenever you hit a wall.

QUIZ: Where Will You Meet Your Soulmate?

Using dating apps is a total gamble and a humbling experience. If you ever plan on downloading a dating app, here are 8 types of men you will find there. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

1. The one that is serious about marriage

This man is there for one reason only: to find a wife. His bio tells you immediately — Richard 34, Christian, doesn’t drink or smoke, is conservative (in Nigeria?), wants kids, works at a good job, followed by three pictures of him in the same outfit and one either at his office, with his mum or his nephews. Of all the types of guys you’d find on dating apps, he is surprisingly the least annoying.

2. The one that is there for good vibes

This guy is not there for anything serious, he goes straight to the point and tells you that he wants to hook up soon. if it’s a no, he immediately blocks you, no time to waste time and you should be happy because he is definitely a creative. Honestly, everyone should aspire to perspire to be as honest as he is. He is here for a good time, not a long time and that itself is a fine art to master.

3. The one that thinks he is on 2go

His name is something silly like Mr Pwesh23. He kills every conversation you try to have with him with his one-worded replies and answers simple questions in the most stupid ways for someone that has “If you are boring, swipe left” in his bio. If you see this guy and you will, do yourself a favour and avoid him because next thing you know, he’d want to hook up.

4. The one that tells you nothing about himself

Yes boo, give us nothing. You’d be lucky if he has pictures of himself at all, and when he does, it won’t be clear. As for his bio? It’ll be empty. You’d find yourself wondering if he created a profile by mistake, he almost makes the 2go guy look good.

5. The travel agent

You can’t tell if this guy is doing yahoo or if he’s just rich and likes travelling a lot. He has the flags of every single country he has ever visited in his bio, and he’s always looking to meet people in whatever new city he finds himself in. In his bio, he lets you know that what he wants in a partner is someone willing to travel the world with him.

6. The one that got away

There’s no better way to describe this guy, his bio is unproblematic, he is gorgeous and has values and ideals that match with yours but your brain and fingers have other plans and now you swiped left and you might never see him again, pele.

7. The sugar daddy

He immediately lets you know that he wants to take care of you and spoil you, he also talks about how much he likes sex so that you know that he isn’t looking for a second wife. Unlike the one that is looking for marriage, he doesn’t add pictures of his wife and kids, and whatever age he puts in his bio, you should add 10 to it.

8. The one that is on a dating app looking for friends

The worst thing about meeting shitty guys on dating apps are these types of guys. He genuinely isn’t looking for a relationship at all but the problem is, he is one of the very few decent ones on the app, at least you found a friend so maybe that’s something.

9. The fitness instructor

It can only go two ways with this guy, he either has pictures of his abs everywhere or enough fitness motivational quotes in his bio to rival a yahoo boy. This guy only has pictures of himself at the gym and works at self-employed. If you are lucky, there will be a shirtless mirror selfie for you to look at.

10. The yahoo boy

These guys win the championship cup as the worst types of guys on dating apps, mostly because they are there to catfish. Sure there’s a white guy called Greg Chapman that finished from Harvard but is living in Oshodi or Becca who is a flight attendant that lives in Shomolu. One point for the ridiculous lies sha. E for effort.

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