The first rule of engagement when conversing with anyone is courtesy. However, with ladies, basic courtesy might do little to nothing to move the exchange from point A to B. If you’re looking to make a new female bestie, here are tips that can help you start a conversation with a girl. 

Let’s get into them.

how to start a conversation with a girl

Starting a Conversation With a Girl Online

There are lots of unhinged folks on social media, so if she’s ignoring your texts or not into the convo, your approach is probably wrong. Here’s how you can fix that

Keep a public profile

Seriously? Your page is private, no display picture,  and you have no posts on your feed? It’s giving catfish and you need to fix up.

Introduce yourself

Even if you have a public profile with photos and bits of information about you, it shouldn’t take the place of talking a little about yourself. What you like or hate, countries you’ve been…No better way to discover shared interests to bond over. 

Text like a sane human

“Wodup, WYD?, Xup, Am, Good PM.” 

You’ll probably get blocked if you use any of these lines before you get a chance to prove that you have sense. 

Be genuine

Why are you in her DMs? Be sincere from the beginning. This can go a long way in setting the tone of your potential friendship.

Ask open-ended questions

Don’t be the regular-shmegular who asks “Yes and No” type questions and gets pissed off when you get “Yes and No” responses.

Listen and respond

Wait, she shares a lengthy ass narration of an experience and you don’t have follow up questions to show you genuinely followed the convo? You are not ready and she’s probably better off not being your friend. 

Be generous with compliments 

Everyone likes compliments. Tell her what you like and why you like it. But hey, she’ll probably catch you faster than you can say sorry if you’re whining her. 

But skip the endearments

No, she’s not your baby and she’s not your “dear”. Don’t do it.

Avoid asking to meet up

You’ve barely texted for 24 hours and you’re asking to meet up because “I’m more lively in person”. 

Starting a Conversation With a Girl Physically

So you’ve run into this girl, and you want them in your corner. Here’s how to bag that first conversation and turn it into a potential friendship or relationship.

Be confident

Yes, we know you want her in your corner but it’s not enough reason to lose your composure. During your first encounter, maintain eye contact as much as you can.

Look the part

It takes a lot of work to change the narrative if you make the wrong first impression. If your outfit is giving “Who be Kwasogbu?”,  it’s probably best to postpone that first conversation to another time.

Give a genuine compliment

Complimenting a stranger is probably the easiest way to get their attention. Once you tell her how nice her hair or makeup is, follow the next tip.

Introduce yourself

Don’t be that person who goes for “Babes. My dear” simply because you failed to ask for her name from the start, or worse still, forgot. A nice intro is never out of fashion.

Listen actively

Remember, this is a face-to-face interaction and the shitty network won’t work. If your new girly is giving you the tea, you better pay attention and take notes.

Minimal physical touch

Remember, she doesn’t know you from jack. Don’t invade her personal space by touching her hair all because “I love this hairstyle”, or any other body parts. Keep your hands to yourself.

Don’t get too personal

Be careful not to overshare just to appear like an open book or get them to also give you details about their lives. There will be time for that later.

Know when to leave

Understand that some people are socially awkward and you might need more than one random convo to interest them. If they don’t want to push the interaction further, please take the cue and leave.

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Enjoyed this piece on how to start a conversation with a girl? Read this next: How To Chat Like A Nigerian Man



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