Imagine thinking you found the one, only to be served breakfast. Now, you’re back on the streets, but you’re not sure where to start — how about with these must-haves.
Before you even think of entering the streets, you need to know it’s very competitive. So bring your A-game; bodycon dresses, crop tops, sleeveless shirts, miniskirts, ashawo shorts, peplum tops, white trad — whatever makes you feel sexy tbh.
EDITOR’s PICK: QUIZ: What Type of Pepper Are You?
People on the streets are wicked, so you have to be wickeda. Before they start to move mad, quickly show them small pepper. Nobody will tell them not to mess with you again.
You should also accompany it with basic first aid skills because you’ll need them. You’d think that being on the streets would spare you from heartbreak, but wait till you meet Femi or Amaka. Even the bandage may not be able to protect your heart.
Nothing can prepare you for the things you’ll see on the streets. But at least, eye drops may help you forget. Just make sure you use them regularly sha so it doesn’t lose potency.
Cane, whip, whatever you choose to call it — whoever says violence is not the answer has never been on the streets.
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Always have a spoon handy. This is pretty obvious because how else do you plan on chopping people’s money? And if you don’t see the money to chop? Don’t worry, you can still chop breakfast.
If you don’t have anything else — for your sake and your partners’. On the streets, people are always threatening to move mad, so when they start to act possessed, just bring out your oil and anoint them against evil.
No, not the kind you’re thinking of. We mean a backup plan for when the streets fail because it most certainly will. So prepare your mind to join the seminary or convent.