Before you dream too much about your japa plans, you should know there’s such a thing as a visa interview, which determines if your japa dream will become a reality.
In other words, you can do everything right, but your village people can still jam you at the interview. Not on our watch, though. Take note of these clever answers to all the most-asked questions.
“Have you been to this country before?”
Yes, I have, actually. In my dreams. That’s why I’m here to make my dreams a reality. Please, help me.
“What will you do if you run out of money there?
Nigeria has taught me how to hustle. I run out of money here, so it’s nothing new. I also like fasting. It’s my best hobby.
“Do you have health insurance for this journey?”
I don’t really used to fall sick like that.
“How long do you plan to stay?”
As long as God is on the throne. Besides, only God knows my tomorrow.
“Do you currently have relatives or friends in this country?”
I can make friends easily. Don’t even worry.
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“Can you show us your bank statement?”
See, officer, I don’t want to offend you by showing you something that’ll spoil your mood. Let’s just be thanking God for life.
“Why do you want to leave your country?”
Shey you dey whine me ni? I love your sense of humour, officer.
“What do you do for a living?”
I wake up every day determined to leave this country. My japa dream is all I live for.
“Who will take care of your properties in Nigeria while you’re away?”
It’s someone who has properties that’ll be thinking that one. Just let me go, make money and come back first.
What’s your opinion of this country?
I know my destiny helpers are there. Just let me pass.