If you have Nigerian parents like mine, asking for money was most likely a grueling and almost terrifying task. You try to prepare and brace yourself ahead of time, but the where, when, why and how combo will always leave you stunned. Here’s a few of their excuses!
As you’re there shivering, they’ll just be looking at you like…
You think I have money growing in the backyard?
Ah ahn, mummy. Only sometimes, now…
What happened to the money I just gave you?
When you’re hit with this question, confusion just sets in! Even if it has been three months since and they ask you, just pull out a pen and get ready to do some accounting. You’ve entered it.
Eh ehn… With your grades?
“Is it with D- in mathematics that you want to collect money? You can calculate money but not ordinary simple algebra??? My friend clear off!”
“When you’re always pressing phone.”
“Why won’t you need money when you are always pressing your phone?” Everything bad in life is because of the phone they bought for you, anyway.
Haven’t you been eating in this house?
But when did I start paying for food nah??? Even when asking for your own money, you have to be careful if you want to keep eating. Issa scam.
What are you even using money for?
Na wah o… Where do I even start?
Go and meet your mother/father.
Even when they know the other person isn’t around. Ugh!
Why didn’t you tell me since?
“And I just finished spending all the money I had o. Sorry.” Chei! But why?
Come and sell me/turn me to money.
Caution! Do not proceed!! Retreat!!!
I don’t have.
Cheee! This is the answer you meet at the final level. The painful boss. No chance to beg further, no progress, no explanation, just… no. You cannot argue with this, even if you see them with tons of money. Just accept your fate and go away. Slap is real.
But last last sha, all is for home training and in good faith, because they struggle too. Shout out to our amazing folks!
What’s it like to be a receptionist in Lagos? It involves a lot of patience. And in this week’s #AWeekInTheLife, a receptionist tells us about reporting co-workers who come late to work, dealing with snobbish callers and why she’s grateful for her job.
“For someone nick-named baby elephant as an overweight kid, I was quite a picky eater. But no one talks about how falling in love can change what we’re willing to eat.” Here, Ortega shares how loving Akinola* made her try shawarma, and maybe one day, amala.
Are you a lazy couch potato like Garfield or a fighter like Puss in boots? Take this quiz and we’ll reveal which popular cartoon cat you are.
#internationalcatday
August is over, and here are some of our best quizzes from August. Enjoy: 1. QUIZ: Only Ajebutters Can Get 10/21 On This Quiz Some people like to form ajepako when they’re really ajebutter. Are you one of them? Let’s find out. 2. QUIZ: Sorry, If You’re Under 25 There’s No Way You Can Pass […]
Are you an ajebutter or not? Well, if you’ve gone through life blissfully unaware of its harshness, then you probably are. Now, we want to know just how high you rank on that ajebutter scale, using your food preferences as a (very accurate) measure. Take to find out:
Everyone has a Nigerian bank that matches their personality. You could either be as likeable as GTB, as efficient as Access or as mature as First Bank. Either way, all you have to do is take this quiz and we’ll let you know with almost 100% certainty. So, go ahead:
Have you ever been with someone so horrible that you swore to never date again? Yes? Well, do you know that one or more of your exes probably feels the same way about you? You never thought about that, huh? Thankfully, this quiz is here to let you know just how much of a hassle […]
Money comes and goes. If you already have it, you probably know what’s eating all your money. But if you don’t, here’s a heads up on the things you’ll suddenly start liking once you have money.
Amazon Prime Video has named Insight Publicis, an agency based out of Nigeria as its creative agency of record as it prepares to launch in Africa’s biggest economy in Q3 2022.
Offers opportunity for young changemakers from Nigeria, Kenya and South Africa to join the Global Citizen Fellowship Program for a year-long, full-Time, paid placement International advocacy organisation Global Citizen has today announced that application for the 2022/23 Global Citizen Fellowship Program powered by BeyGOOD is now open until 29th April 2022. Fifteen young African changemakers: […]
Triller, the AI-powered, open garden technology platform for creators, has joined #BreakTheBias, the global campaign in honor of International Women’s Day (#IWD2022) on Tuesday, 8th March. All Triller platforms will feature stories from 30 incredible women in the music and entertainment industry who are working to end gender bias, along with a specially curated #BreakTheBias […]
In view of the humanitarian crisis in Ukraine, MTN has announced it will be offering free international calls and SMS to all existing prepaid and postpaid customers, effective immediately. This offer is aimed at supporting customers to stay in touch with their loved ones while eliminating associated International Direct Dialing (IDD) costs due to high […]
ASUS has released its new Zenbook 14 Flip OLED (UP5401EA) and Vivobook Pro series (N7600/N7400). Pre-orders are available now. The Zenbook 14 Flip OLED (UP5401EA) is a slim, light and ultra-versatile convertible design equipped with a 4K OLED HDR NanoEdge touchscreen, having a 16:10 aspect ratio to give you a bigger visual workspace. The Asus […]
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
Z! Stacks
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Are you a lazy couch potato like Garfield or a fighter like Puss in boots? Take this quiz and we’ll reveal which popular cartoon cat you are.
#internationalcatday
Join The Conversation
Bring a friend.