The only things certain in this life are taxes, death and these eight types of people you’ll be lucky to meet at a queer event.
1. The are-we-here-for-the-same-event? people
No. The answer is always no. So what if it was supposed to be a casual event? These ones always look like they just came back from a fashion show, with their two-piece outfits and fancy boots. Never to be caught unfresh.
2. The overly friendly gay man
He talks to you like he has known you for years, which makes you feel warm and welcome,especially if it’s your first queer event. He’s most likely going to introduce you to people you’ll keep meeting everywhere until you become friends. You won’t find him after that because he’s too busy hopping friend groups.
3. The 30+ lesbians
Technically, they’re never really 30+, they just behave that way. They sit together like old men in a club, but when they get wasted? That’s when the party begins.
4. The baby gays
You can always spot them in the crowd. They’re either too hyped or quiet as fuck, looking as gay as the eyes can see. You’d behave any of those ways too if you finally found your community after….
5. The mom friend lesbian
They don’t even have to be your friend or know you. They’ll just walk up to you and ask if you’re doing okay and how you’re getting home? Legit the sweetest set of people you’ll ever meet as a baby gay in a queer event.
6. The party hopper
Home? What’s that? These guys live for the next thrill. They always know the right places to go and the next happening event. Their energy needs to be bottled up and sold because how do they do it?
7. The ones bonding on the floor
Wherever six or nine queer people are gathered, four people will bond over trauma. If you pass by them, just walk away because as soon as you sit down, it’s about to be filled with tears and feelings you didn’t come to a party for. It does feel good talking about it in a safe space, though.
8. The couple
Wherever you find one, you’ll find the other. They’re like rainbow magnets that always find their way back to each other. They’re cute to look at, though. Especially older couples. They just give people hope.
CONTINUE READING: The Lesbian Dating Experience: Expectations vs. Reality