Can We Convince You To Not Apply For That Visa?

April 24, 2019

Can we bend your ear for a minute? Have you nursed dreams of leaving the shores of the country to a place that ‘works’?

Perhaps the lure of fancy things like ‘stable electricity’ and ‘welfare programs’ has had you keeping long nights, studying for the IELTS, even though in your heart, you know Mrs. Ekanem knew what she was doing when she gave you that Best in English Language prize?

Maybe you’ve lost your weekends to language classes — slaving over French conjugations and trying to make sense of German capitalisations because you’re ready to risk it all for a chance at that Quebec stay or Merkel’s Germany?

Well, we’re going to go against the very essence of our beings and attempt to convince you to hold off on the classes and the grueling application procedures, to maybe give Nigeria a second chance. But we’re going to do it together, assessing the current systems in place to TRY TO UNDERSTAND IF YOUR REASONS FOR LEAVING ARE WORTHWHILE.

As it currently stands, the main reasons for Nigerian emigration stem from: the economy, security, better welfare, education and maybe tourism. We’ll attempt to break these down to understand if Nigeria’s situation is so bad, thousands and thousands of miles are necessary to keep you away:

Education

Now, we all know Nigerian employers let their bias for international degrees show and a UK Masters degree is essential to progress as a Yoruba demon, but can we try to help you see reason in not travelling?

So what if Nigerian Universities are under resourced and Nigerian lecturers prefer their notes antiquated? At the last count, two Nigerian Universities – Covenant and The University of Lagos made it to the top 700 in the world.

What was that? You deserve only the best and no one remembers number 2, let alone number 689?

Well, at least we tried, go on and fill out that visa form.

Economy

Because we are honestly kind people at heart, if you’re looking to leave because of Nigeria’s economy, we won’t try to stop you. Any escape from the poverty capital of the world, currently boasting a double-digit unemployment rate (23.1%) is a welcome relief. Go on with your bad self.

Better Welfare

Let’s see – are power, pliable roads, a sympathetic police force, running water, working emergency systems, sturdy bridges, reliable power supply and a welfare system for the poor that inalienable, that you have to leave the country to feel like a loved citizen?

Okay, so maybe we have no point with this one.

Security

Okay, it’s terrible that we have two known terrorist organisations currently ravaging the state, and it has happened more than once that school children were taken from their schools to fulfil a worrying agenda. Also, it maybe that your sons, brothers, nephews and maybe even you aren’t safe from trigger happy policemen.

…You know what, let us know how we can help you with that visa application form.

So, we’re admitting failure here. If you can escape, pick today to do so. Let no one try to put sand-sand in your garri. Unless of course, you have good reasons to stay, then please let us have them in the comments below.

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

November 22, 2019

This is Zikoko’s Game of Votes Weekly Dispatch. We share the most important things that happen in Nigeria every week. 5pm Thursdays. Stay woke.  Beggi Beggi, E No Good O     Who knew Yahaya Bello, governor of Kogi State, was so influential? He definitely yields some kind of power over the who’s who in Nigerian politics if a whole Madame […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

October 10, 2019

2019 is certainly Burna Boy’s year, but, if we are being honest, so was 2018. Since his transcendent mixtape, Outside, the afro-fusion star has refused to get his foot of our necks — dropping a string of fantastic singles and then capping it all off with his career-best album, African Giant.  So, in a bid […]

November 27, 2019

Do you have a face that could make angels jealous, or should you really be walking around with a nylon bag over your head so you don’t scare children? Well, this quiz is here to answer that by telling you exactly how good-looking you are. Take and find out: 11 Quizzes For People Who Aren’t […]

January 2, 2020

Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer. 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are Ready To Marry  Are you ready to marry? Take these quizzes.

April 9, 2020

At some point in life, we all learnt that someone can be very intelligent and still lack common sense. That’s the difference between being book smart and being street smart. If you’re not sure where on the spectrum you fall, well, that’s what this quiz is here to tell you. Take it:

November 1, 2019

Twitter is buzzing right now, bringing a new conversation to the concept of cool vs not-so-cool, especially in relationships. If you’ve been thinking about how much of a red flag you are, why don’t you let this quiz help you decide once and for all?

More from Citizen

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X