We’re in the last month of 2023, and we can barely feel the celebration in the air. Economy still is hard AF, purses are almost empty, friends and loved ones are on the japa wave. Nothing feels as they used to. Detty December doesn’t bang like it used to.

But we have one life and can’t come and kill ourselves. If you’re like us, come here and we’ll let you in on a secret; we’ve figured out some simple hacks to enjoying Detty December.

Work with the president

It’s been raining special assistants at Aso Rock. Do you see the opportunity we see? If you can convince Tinubu to make you a special assistant’s assistant, you’re all set for December. Start revamping your CV.

Work in a night club

It’s not a secret that nightclubs will be full of activities this December. Get a job there,work the bottle service and get the chance to enjoy free music and party with celebrities.

Play Santa and other mascots

If you can take up gigs where you’ll cosplay as  Santa Claus or the Teletubbies,  This is your time to shine. You won’t get only money payment out of it; you’ll also enjoy music and kids.. Detty December is all about music and dance, isn’t it?

Home is where the fun is  is

If all else fails, sit down in your house o. Because if you step outside for one minute, 100k has gone.

If you don’t do Detty December outside this year, you’ll do it next year. Trust the vibe.

Buy unlimited data

As you already know, outside is fucking expensive. You might as well stay indoors and spend your Detty December budget on data and Netflix streaming subscriptions. You will enjoy movies and views from those outside.

Not discouraging you from going outside to flex, but also see this as your chance to be the film guru in your circle.

Go to your village

If you really need to change your location this December, pity your account and go to your village.  We hope you have the courage to walk away from the noise, chaos,and the bills in the city.

Organise with friends

If going to your village is not an option because you want to be with your friends, there’s one more option to explore.You guys can have fun by putting your little Detty December budgets together and having a cheerful and warm house party. Remember a wise man said, “in the sweetness of friendship, let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things, does the heart find its morning and is refreshed.”


Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.