Fifteen Things You Must Budget For If You Live In Nigeria

November 6, 2018
If you are a part of the very small percentage of Nigerian adults who have their lives put together enough to make budgets, we have a thing or two to tell you. While you might think that you’ve covered all your bases. You’ve made a budget for food, transport even Friday night faji, there are a couple of key things you are leaving out of your budget that could ruin your finances.

The second cloth you have to buy after your tailor takes the aso-ebi you bought for a wedding and travelled with it.

Please, when are we going to come together as a people and boycott Nigerian tailors?

The extra tyre you need to buy after that deep pothole on your street finally tears your tyre.

And the second one you’ll buy after the same pothole tears the new one.

If you thought you’ll need only 10k fuel for the month double it, because the transformer on your street will blow and you won’t have light for three months.

And you’ll still contribute for NEPA people to come and fix the transformer.

Drugs for malaria you only got because your street has been flooded for the past two weeks.

By the time you get your hospital bill, you’ll wish you just stayed home and prayed the malaria away.

The third and fourth internet subscriptions you have to pay for because the first two start moving mad.

Then you go back to the first two when the third and fourth one starts misbehaving too.

The funny sound your generator starts making even though you only serviced it last week.

You’ll think it just needs to be serviced again until your gen guy tells you, you need to replace the carburetor.

When someone steals wires from the NEPA pole on your street and you have to contribute to pay for it.

You also have to settle the NEPA guys who will come and fix it.

The new phone you have to buy because they obtained your old one in traffic.

Shebi if the traffic was moving the thief won’t have seen road to collect your phone.

When your rent is due on January 1st and your landlord tells you on the 31st that he’s increasing the rent.

After you’ve used all your extra money for December rocks.

Getting that message from your younger brother, sister asking for money.

Me sef I need epp.

The borehole in your compound just suddenly stops working because the last plumber to fix it used fake parts.

And you just fixed it last month,

All the people you have to settle just so you don’t die on the line collecting things like your driver’s license or passport.

And they’ll still ask anything for the boys after you’ve settled them.

Settling police so they can release your friend they carried for no reason.

They said because he was using an iPhone he must be a yahoo boy.

The side mirror of your car you have to replace because one danfo guy trying to overtake you hit it.

After hitting it he started rolling on the floor using God to beg you.

Having to replace the compressor of your freezer because NEPA blew it.

And the surge protector you bought was fake.

NEPA bringing a 90k bill for you even though they only gave you light twice that month.

If you don’t have a prepaid meter go and get one now.

Did we leave anyone out?

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

February 4, 2021

Loaning people money can be a tricky situation because there is always a chance that they might default on payment. There are no guarantees, really. In this article, we asked four Nigerians to talk about being owed money by their friends. This is what they said. Dapo An ex was in a tough spot, and […]

August 18, 2020

On Sunday, Bishop David Oyedepo, the President of Living Faith Church Worldwide, while preaching , kicked against the application of a section of the recently passed into law Companies and Allied Matters Act 2020 (“CAMA”), stating that such a section of the law was due to the jealousy of the government to the growth of […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

November 12, 2019

Are you a single pringle, stuck in a complicated situationship or happily married to the love of your life? This quiz is here to guess your current relationship status, and as you know, Zikoko quizzes are incredibly accurate (don’t quote us). So, give a shot:

October 30, 2019

Kemi Adetiba’s King of Boys movie got a lot of things right, especially casting, so yes, it was a monster hit. Now, we know you may not have put much thought to this, but the personalities of some of the characters closely match yours, and we would like to help you find the perfect match. […]

November 1, 2019

Twitter is buzzing right now, bringing a new conversation to the concept of cool vs not-so-cool, especially in relationships. If you’ve been thinking about how much of a red flag you are, why don’t you let this quiz help you decide once and for all?

November 30, 2019

With No Nut November FINALLY coming to an end, we’ve decided to mark the torturous month with some more horny content. After quizzes that guessed how many people you’ve slept with, how good you are in bed and who you’ll sleep with next, this one will guess when next you’ll get lucky. Take it to […]

More from Money

February 7, 2023

Chidi’s girlfriend surprises him with birthday gifts, while all he can give her are urgent ₦5ks and ₦10ks. With a 40k salary and ₦300k in debt, can he stay optimistic even when his girlfriend is about to make more than twice his salary?

He talks to us about it on #LoveCurrency

Doctor by Day, Nollywood Sweetheart by Night, How She Do Am?
January 31, 2023

Jemima Osunde is a 26-year-old physiotherapist and actress. Fed up with the chaos of medical school, she decided to pursue acting on the side. She called her big break pure luck, but through her story, we found out what it’s like to hustle as a newbie in Nollywood.

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X