1. Whenever you hear “pass on the torch”

…still brightly gleaming.

2. When you enter stealth mode to fap water from your dorm girls.

Epp me, Lord.

3. When you’re leaving dining hall and you hear “one ju” or “junior girl with the…”

Hay God!

4. You, when KC boys start arriving for Interhouse sports.

When you pretend to start stretching for calisthenics.

5. When you see a KC boy talking to one ISL girl.

Ugh! Do better.

6. Vivian Fowler girls looking at you and your squad like:

Stay pained.

7. Your face, whenever you see babes scaling fence.

Is it that deep?

8. Whenever you hear that Maty Obong or Mrs. Obi are coming.


9. “Obasa girls, dirty towels I can stand, but dirty pants I cannot stand. Whose pant is this?”

Don’t look at me.

10. When it’s time for Saturday morning inspection.

The worst.

11. When you hear that you’re a toilet worker instead of a dorm worker.

Who did I offend?

12. How dining hall looked every Sunday:

From Pap and akara to jollof rice.

13. You and your girls during dance, dance, dance.

Let us scatter the floor.

14. When you heard that school had cancelled Scruples.


15. You, the first time you caught two girls “lesbianing” together.


16. Whenever someone asks if you’re a QC old girl.

Proud OG! Co-written by Zikoko contributor, @Cyntheeya


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