A Short List Of Things We Need Our Flying Aunties And Uncles To Do ASAP

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February 2, 2017

1. We hear our aunties and uncles can fly at night but they cannot turn us into birds so we can avoid airport wahala?

Is it good like that?

2. And why can’t they use their eyes to do something about the Naira-Dollar rate that is dancing shoki?

No really, they should explain.

3. How is it possible that I can’t get same-day delivery in this Nigeria and our Edo aunties are just looking?

You people are not using your power well o!

4. And seriously, do I really have to stalk my bae before I know he’s cheating? Woman to woman, can’t you arrange some sort of spiritual surveillance for him?

This needs to be fixed immediately.

5. Let’s talk about this traffic issue in Lagos. Is it because you people can fly that you don’t want to remedy the issue?

If we say you should give us wings now, you won’t answer.

6. And why can’t you automatically cause corrupt government officials to fall sick and confess? Are you also eating out of the money?

You people have joined bad gang abi?

7. This one is personal, but WHY AM I ALWAYS BROKE?

Why can’t you uplift my account small?

8. Instead of getting yourself caught in electric poles all the time, why can’t you just talk to Buhari in his sleep?

He doesn’t listen to the masses but he has no choice with you guys.

Please let us all have sense. Kindly do the needful.

Thanks and God bless!
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