The Struggles Of Being Romantic In Lagos

July 19, 2016

So that’s how one Lagos boy just finished watching a nollywood romance movie and started feeling inspired

It’s time to move to the next level.

So he does more “research” and plots and plans like a real Lagos boy

It’s a serious matter!

He first takes one babe for a picnic in the park

Eat. Love. Nature…. “romantic sometings”.

But then all the insects in Lagos decide to join them

Na wa for Lagos nature oh.

On to the next babe… because he has many.

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.

He decides to take the next babe on a long drive

Love in the time of potholes.

But then they enter one deadly traffic

Mo daran!

Then he decides to up his game and write her a “not so anonymous” anonymous letter

Shakespeare abeg shift, the real writers are here!

Only for her to complain that one idiot wrote her an anonymous letter talking rubbish

Can you imagine? After all his hard work oh.

Then he battles another traffic just to play romantic music outside her window

This one must click.

Only to get to her gate and hear “ah madam said I should say she is not around oh”

You say what?

Then finally he tries to do a real romance and kiss in the rain

Come on baby!

Only for her to start shouting that he ruined her hair and now she has cattarh

Aunty you will not kill someone sha!

So he decides to give up and goes back to his normal level of late night call, credit and shawarma

Son of man cannot come and go and die. Not everything is for everybody abeg!

Moral of the story; not everytime copy-cata, sometimes face your front

Leave romance for nollywood, biko.

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