With Nigerian Aunties, it is one of two things. Either they make life soft or a living hell for you. There’s the one that is basically your elder sister and the one that is always in your business 24/7. Here are 8 types of Nigerian aunties.
1.The rich Nigerian aunty
This type of Nigerian aunty is the oga of them all. She sends money when you are at your most broke, not just on your birthday. It’s almost as if she can read your mind. This is the one aunty that can do no wrong in your books.
2. The aunty that always sends WhatsApp broadcast messages
This type of Nigerian aunty believes in every and any conspiracy theory out there. According to her, Obama is the antichrist and you should drink lime every morning when you wake up to prevent cancer. You sometimes wonder how she manages to come out of her house when she is afraid of everything. The worst part is that she won’t enjoy her nonsense alone, she’d send it to you or your mum who actually believes it.
3. The aunty that stays abroad
She always buys you nice things on your list when she comes to visit Nigeria but somehow still manages to be strict. You don’t know if you like her or if you like her gifts.
4.The one that monitors your life
I like to call this on CCTV because she’s always monitoring you. You’ve blocked her on most social media but she always finds a way to monitor you. If she was just doing this and keeping the information to herself there won’t be a problem but no, she will call your parents personally to tell them that you are being wayward. The question is why are you, an old person, in another person’s business?
5. The spiritual aunty
In the battle of worst to best Nigerian aunties, she wins. Spending time in her house is a nightmare, they are always praying against one thing or the other. She also either gives birth to your favourite cousins or your least favourite cousins and no there’s no in-between.
6. The aunty that doesn’t send anybody
She’s not on the family group chat, she doesn’t pick calls, doesn’t partake in family drama and people only see her once in five years. Her kids are fun to be around and she is a lot more open-minded for someone her age. She’s not about that stressful life.
7. The aunty that’s your dad’s sister
This one doesn’t even qualify to be called an aunty, this type of Nigerian aunty doesn’t do anything for you. She doesn’t call, send money or check up on you but will be offended that you graduated from school and didn’t invite her. A clown.
8. The aunty that is actually your cousin
She is that one cousin that has always and will always be several years older than you and because you didn’t know what to call her, you started calling her Aunty. She is the best of them all, she might not be as rich but she will always show up for you and she is always on your side. The best babe for real.