Lying to men is completely acceptable; they deserve wickedness, but babes can we at least stop lying to ourselves? Deep down, we’re all pretending to like at least one thing on this list. You can continue lying after reading this, but at least catch your sub in private. 

1. Tea

Especially green tea. Can we put a stop to parading tasteless things like green tea around? You know you want to add milk and sugar after each sip, so why are you punishing yourself? Okay, I know it’s for fitfam goals, but even though. 

2. Coffee

I’m talking to the women with the coffee mugs that say “Boss babe”. You’re selling fake dreams and it’s mostly the women drinking black coffee. It’s bitter; stop lying. 

3. Squats

I’m here for body goals, but let’s stop glamourising the stress involved, please. Going up and down 100 times on one spot is stressful, and you hate it. Admit it when you take your gym selfies.

4. Pasta

If it’s not jollof spaghetti, women are lying about loving pasta — especially creamy pasta. First of all, it doesn’t have pepper. Second, why would I pay ₦10k for food and it comes with shredded chicken or four tiny shrimps? Where is my chicken lap? Call it my lack of acquired taste, but you too, you know what’s going on deep down. Buy amala and be okay dear.

5. Love

Love is wicked. Stop hyping it up and down. Thank you. 

6. Boob tapes

Bras are hell, but boob tapes aren’t any better. For busty girls, it doesn’t hold anything up, and it’s painful to take off. So why are we still hyping boob tapes? You hate them. Stop it.

RELATED: 9 Things You Need to Know About Boobs

7. Being independent

Every time you swipe your card to pay for something, you’re in severe pain. It’s alright to admit you want to be spoiled. Not every time, “I’m a strong black woman.” Chose the soft life sometimes.

8. Skincare

Every time I see the price of sunscreen, I shed a tear or two. Beyond the price, it’s so annoying to deal with the stress of washing your face every night. Then the worst part is having ten more steps to follow. All in the name of black don’t crack? 

RELATED: Why Nigerian Women Still Need Sunscreen, According to Olapeju

9. Juicing

Every day, women come up with strange concoctions like blending beetroot, ugwu leaves and ginger. Why?

10. Wigs

Slay queen that is causing heat. Remove the wig and be free. If one person can voice it out, we’ll be free from wearing these helmets for fashion.

ALSO READ: 10 Common Lies Nigerians Tell



Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.