10 Common Lies Nigerians Tell

February 8, 2020

In case you have not realised it, Nigerians have a PhD in lying. Multiple PhDs, even. And there are some people who are professors in the art of lying, but we will keep that conversation for another day. Anyway, here is a list of common lies Nigerians tell. Don’t lie, we know you must told at least half of them in your lifetime. Ole ni everybody.

1. “I’m already on the bike.”

Liz Benson pissed off by liars

When they’ve not even left the house.

2. “Hello? Hello? Ah, this network is bad o.”

Nigerians lying on the phone

Especially when it’s time to talk about their debts.

3. “It’s not even the stolen iPhone X that pained me. It’s my SIM card.”

Nollywook actor Okunnu annoyed about lying

You mean your free Glo SIM card? Abegi shut up.

4. “Your clothes will be ready next week.”

nigerian tailors disappointing clients

The trademark lie of Nigerian tailors.

5. “I’m not even pained by the break-up. I just want to know who they are dating now.”

Just say it’s paining you. We will understand.

6. “I used to come first back then in secondary school.”

Nigerian parents, hello.

7. “Oga, climb the bike. I sabi the place well-well.”

Image result for okada riders

Hausa bike riders when they’re about to ‘lost’ you.

8. “We’ll just cuddle, nothing more.”

Image result for why you lying meme

That’s how someone I know started cuddling a pregnancy.

9. “It will not come out in the exam.”

Image result for nigerian lecturers

But it’s question one and compulsory.

10. “I am not aware of any Social Media Bill.”

The role model we all look up to.

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

November 20, 2019

Last month, we thoughtfully made a quiz telling you guys exactly when you’ll marry, but some of you claimed that your spouse was nowhere to be found. Well, now we’ve created one that’ll tell you exactly who you’ll be dragging down that aisle. Take and start planning that wedding: 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are […]

September 1, 2021

August is over, and here are some of our best quizzes from August. Enjoy: 1. QUIZ: Only Ajebutters Can Get 10/21 On This Quiz Some people like to form ajepako when they’re really ajebutter. Are you one of them? Let’s find out. 2. QUIZ: Sorry, If You’re Under 25 There’s No Way You Can Pass […]

November 11, 2019

Today, we are going to be using your taste in music to determine how good you actually are in bed. All you need to do is create the ultimate Nigerian hit — from the lead artist to the producer — and we’ll tell you if all your partners leave satisfied, or if you are just […]

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

More from General

December 12, 2022

Vol 8 | 12-12-2022 View in Browser Brought to you by | We should pop something today! The first Naira Life story was published in February 2019 and since then, we’ve been putting out the most honest stories about Nigerians and their money. Today, I’m happy to be sharing the 200th Naira Life story. This […]

November 11, 2022

We know a lot of things are happening right now but let’s not forget that millions of Nigerians are still suffering the effects of flooding. Although coverage of the issue has reduced, it’s important that we keep in mind that a large part of over 30 Nigerian states are under water.  This is not just […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X