Women are raised differently. These six Nigerian women talk about what it’s like having strict parents .
I had to create a whole new personality especially for them. I have a bunch of interests like photography, video editing, graphic design, music but they don’t know that. like they know nothing about any of my hobbies. Also, I’m not particularly nice to my family because I am always on edge. I can’t introduce my friends to them because unlike me, my friends are openly wayward. There was a period in my life where I never texted people partly because my dad used to randomly go through my phone.
I’ve learned to keep a lot to myself. I don’t talk about anything, and I stopped asking for permission to go anywhere because it was always futile. My lying skills have been perfected, and they think they know me but they only know the me I’ve shown them.
I have strict anti social parents. My parents don’t have friends and their family isn’t close-knit so I don’t any sort of relationship with my relatives. We’re like an island. I’ve never attended a wedding, birthday party, naming ceremony, stayed at my cousins’, that kind thing. I start to lie instinctively around them like a compulsive liar. I don’t think about it too much, it just flows. I pick and choose when to lie and they trust me because they’ve never caught me. My parents don’t think I need fun, so they don’t think I do anything for fun.
I was warned to never have a social media account from a very tender age, but I was curious so I made a Facebook account and my parents found it. I knew hell that day. My mum kicked and punched me. I couldn’t fight back, so I just sat there and let her beat me. I was 15 at the time. Rebelling was something I had to teach myself because they will control any and everything they can. I got my first phone when I was 17, and I bought it for myself. My dad once beat me up, stripped me, punished me all night and woke up at midnight to beat me again because he found my Instagram. I always tell people, no one can hurt me more than my parents have. There’s no insult that can hurt me cause I’ve heard it all from my parents before.
My dad’s strictness is him being extremely security cautious, but my mum? I feel like she’s projecting because she knew what she was doing at my age. When my brother does something, suddenly my mum doesn’t remember you can beat someone with a lamp charger.
Having strict parents means I get left out of things because I’m not allowed to go out. I’m incapable of maintaining a friendship with extroverted people because they always want to go somewhere. I’m 19 and can’t go out without my parents’ permission and them taking me there.
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