Amala, ewedu, and gbegiri, also called “Abula”, isn’t a meal that exactly enjoys the best PR. In fact, it’s one of the most slandered meals on Obasanjo’s internet, especially by people who didn’t grow up in Western Nigeria.
However, according to the Zikoko Bureau of Imaginary Statistics (ZBIS), a lot of people fall in love with the Western Nigerian staple once they give it a chance. Having met and spoken with people who overcame their initial disgust to fall in love with abula, we have decided to draft a step-by-step guide on how to love and enjoy the meal.
1. Don’t judge a book by its cover
You know that looks can be deceiving shey? I mean, look at the disappointment that is strawberries and Lagos Island at night. Some of you have said that abula isn’t particularly big on aesthetics, but what it lacks in looks, it makes up for in taste.
2. Be brave
Yes, we admit that deciding to start eating abula as an adult is no easy feat, especially as you may have some issues with its UI. But you have to be brave in your resolve. You have to be determined to try, against all principalities and powers preventing you from giving this meal a chance.
3. Be open-minded
Being open-minded is not just about understanding the opinions of others. You have to be able to give things a chance regardless of what other people have said about them. Gather courage and look beyond all the amala slander that flies into your face every time you log in on Twitter.
For people who have been scarred by traumatic images of amala and ewedu on the internet, it may not be easy for you to come up with the psychological resolve to eat it on your own. You may also not be mentally ready for the shock you’re about to experience when the delicious taste of abula hits your taste buds. So you may need to see a shrink to mentally prepare you for what’s to come.
5. Divine guidance
Some of you may have never tasted abula because you lack the spiritual foresight to know the good things of this life. So you may need to contact your spiritual leader after you’re done with therapy.
With these few guidelines we have provided, we hope you now have the tools to execute judgment upon the next bowl of abula that comes your way.