Chasing a university degree in Nigeria is extreme sports; maybe that’s why Nigerian university students do the most.
Here are the wildest things students do in Nigerian universities.
1. Party all night and still make it to morning classes
Nigerian students would spend the night cubbing and still show up at a 7 a.m. class the next day. These days, capitalism has us by our throats. If you try going “outside” on a Sunday night, you can almost die at 9 a.m. meeting the next day. Life comes at you fast.
2. Students on drugs
This thing was a whole pandemic. One day in DELSU, this guy had a seizure in the middle of a 500L exam. Turns out he’d overdosed on drugs. Bro, you’re literally at the finish line. Whyyyyy?
Some other guy stole his drug test results from the school hospital. He got caught and expelled.
3. Receiving awards with convoys
Wannabe student celebs would pay departmental directors of socials to give them awards. At the departmental night, when the awardees were called to receive the award, every single person they knew would dance with them to the podium to receive the award. Make it make sense!
4. Ponzi Schemes
Fam, this was a whole pandemic that year. You couldn’t walk five steps without someone approaching you to “bring someone”. After the first ponzi wave passed — when schemes like MMM and Ultimate Cycler crashed — students started building websites that’d crash after 30 minutes. The race to cash out was insane because people knew they’d lose serious money but were still willing to bet on being one of the first to “get help”. Fam, 2016 was the pits!
5. Going to Night Class to sleep
People literally left the comfort of their beds and braved the dangerous night streets, only to go and sleep on wooden desks after 10 minutes of cramming.
6. Sex in strange places during Night Class
People were having sex on the staircase of Carver Building, fam! They’d read for like 30 minutes and then sneak out one after the other for “fresh air”. A couple in Babcock University was caught having sex in the gutter — a dry gutter, but still.
7. Going to the school library to sleep
People who usually did these were those serious but average students who you’d only ever see in class. After classes, they’d head to the library until night. You’d think they were always reading but guy, na disguise. Have you ever been to Nnamdi Azikiwe Library in UNN? That’s the most comfortable place to sleep in the whole school, and those students took full advantage.
8. “Airport flights”
This was more of a survival skill. Male hostels are the absolute ghetto. Typically poorly maintained, nobody uses the shared toilets unless you want to invite diseases into your body. So, students would wait until night, stroll into the surrounding bushes (the “airport”), spread a nylon bag and squat. Once they were done, they’d fling the bag of shit further into the bush — catching flights.