Week one in the Big Brother house is done, and for that, we say thank you to Biggie’s liquor supplier. Because the way these housemates started this season with a determination to do the most daily? We’re surprised Biggie hasn’t opened the front door and told at least four of them to return to their family homes.
As week one comes to a close, let’s take a look at what happened in Big Brother’s house this weekend.
The Richest Titan … for now
The housemates played their very first arena games, and Marvin aka Abulegba Muscle Man, won a thousand dollars.
The end of the #Khoyemi era?
Khosi and Yemi started their stay in Big Brother’s house as conjoined twins, following each other up and down and doing touching body everywhere. Now, in true Yoruba man fashion, Yemi’s started moving to other babes in the house and complaining about being restricted by Khosi and needing his space.
People say, “We’re all unique and one of a kind”, and all these nice things that make us feel special. But clearly, those are all lies. If everyone’s unique, then why and how are Yoruba man, Yemi and Xhosa man, Juicy Jay acting like twin brothers and moving in similar suspicious ways?
Alcohol doing the damn thing
The housemates drank 5.9% beer on Saturday, and a lot went down. Mmeli and Sandra shared multiple kisses, Olivia drunkenly told Thabang, the small boy, that he should stop avoiding her and Jenni O basically went fuck friendship and moved aggressively to Juicy Jay.
Big Brother needs to come up with new ways to keep all of us on our ten toes because he’s done this in 2021, and now he’s doing it again? We get that it works, but Biggie is fast becoming predictable.
Double Wahala reboot
When Big Brother titled this season “Ziyakhala Wahala”, we should have known that both words meaning wahala was his own way of telling us Double Wahala 2.0.
A juicy family
Friday night, Juicy Jay pulled Yvonne for a quick chat and basically confessed all his sexual and friendly feelings to her. They decided to embark on an open situationship, which should be considered criminal behaviour because what does that even mean. Now, it seems like the happy couple is a throuple after Jenni O confessed her feelings to Juicy Jay and has refused to let #Jayvonne mingle in peace.
The battle of the bad bitches
“Are you a bad bitch? No, I am a bad bitch.” “You want to fuck me up? You can’t fuck me up”. That was the entirety of this fight, a call-and-response that had absolutely no point and went on for entirely too long.
It was fine for a hot minute, but Sandra and Olivia shouting at each other from opposite ends of the house and almost sending their respective partners into cardiac arrest started giving agbero foreplay real quick.
If we’re rating Big Brother fights, we’ll give this one a solid 2.5/10. 1 for the momentary burst of adrenaline it gave us and the other 1.5 for the sheer brilliance of Sandalili’s insults, cause what does Motorola forming to be an iPhone 14 MEAN???