Nigerian men need to enrol in one of these seven courses if they want the quality of their lives to be better. We’re rooting for you, kings.  

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1. Patience 101

Nigerian men need to rise above leaving their kids at home in fits of annoyance every Sunday. Be the change king; change begins with you. 

2. Fundamentals of active listening 

Dear Nigerian men, if you do not press your phones when you talk to your boss, why would you do that when your partner is talking to you?  

3. Advanced cooking (that isn’t just noodles) 

You need to stop being proud of yourself because you made noodles and added vegetables or sardine. If you can’t make at least four or five soups, who will marry you like this? 

4. Introduction to romance

It would not kill you guys to do something romantic once in a while, sha let it be something your partner likes. And remember not to mix up your partner’s names. Stay safe kings. 

5. Moisturising for dummies

Having a proper skincare routine is not as scary as you think it is and this nano degree will change your life. It’s 2022, there’s no excuse for being ashy.  

6. Basic texting etiquette  

We know it’s hard, but when she sends you a text, you’re supposed to reply to every single point she mentions. We know your demons want you to reply with “Okay” or to only reply to the last text she sent in a series of messages, but please, don’t let the devil use you to use her. 

7. The beginner’s guide to self-care

Kings, we know it’s hard, but you need to learn how to take care of yourself first. That brother, girlfriend or sister-in-law’s problem will happen again next month. Buy yourself that PS5 or a nice t-shirt. You deserve to be taken care of.


 

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