1. You move to a new area and finally make a rich friend

“Hey man. I’m new to the area. Is that your Range Rover outside?”

2. Then he invites you to meet his other friends at his expensive house.

And you’re wondering why one of them reminds you of Kanayo O. Kanayo.

3. They finally ask where you live so they can come check on you.

So you have to make up the craziest lie about how your estate only allows visitors on Monday morning and Saturday midnight.

4. First night out as guys, and they decide to order at a fancy restaurant

“Can I have a bottle of water, please? I’m fasting”

5. When they talk about their vacation trips but you’ve only gone to Ogbomosho

“God. Why is my life like this? Who do I have to beg?”

6. Sharing interesting stories about the most trying times in their lives

But you can’t say your own because it sounds like something from “Labe Orun”.

7. Everyone says you’re the most humble of your friends

Dave Chappell - I'm broke
But you can’t afford to be carrying shoulder. You actually can’t afford anything.

8. You and your self-esteem

Because your confidence is tied to your account balance.

9. One day your rich friend comes to you for an emergency loan.

*laughs in long-term poverty*

10. When they eventually start doing things without you

Alone is my best friend.
Loneliness is a social construct.

11. So you decide to hustle your way up.

“If we no get money, wetin we gain” – Victor AD. 2018.


Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.