7 Things You’ll Relate To If You’re A Terrible Person Deep Down

May 31, 2017

1. When someone trips and falls (even if it’s an old person), your first reaction is this

*snickers*

2. When somebody tells you that they’re sick and instead of saying sorry, your reaction is this

“Is it contagious? I don’t want to catch whatever you have abeg”

3. If you find out that someone got injured while doing something reckless (like backflips or trying to replicate Beyonce’s choreography from the 2016 Super Bowl Half-Time show), the first thing you’ll say is

STOP IT!

4. If you’re at a supermarket and you see a short person trying (and failing) to reach something on a high shelf, before you offer to help, you’ll be like

“Let me help you with….” *blows catarrh in a futile attempt to stifle laughter*

5. If you’re going out with a friend and you notice a hole in their clothes, you won’t say anything until you get to your destination.

Because tragedy is the foundation of all comedy.

6. When someone tells you that something terrible happened to them, the first words out of your mouth are

Because all you care about is YOU. Other people don’t matter.

7. When your friend that has terrible eyesight can’t find his glasses and is searching for it frantically because he can’t see shit without it and you’re just like

“This nigga can’t see! LOL”

More Zikoko!

A Story Of How Terrifying Your First HIV Test Will Be

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

October 22, 2019

So you’ve been looking for a job for monthssss and one finally lands on your lap when you thought all was lost. Now you’re revamping your old outfits for your new role – you have to dress to look the part – and looking forward to working with your new colleagues and boss. Well, while […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

Recommended Quizzes

October 30, 2019

Kemi Adetiba’s King of Boys movie got a lot of things right, especially casting, so yes, it was a monster hit. Now, we know you may not have put much thought to this, but the personalities of some of the characters closely match yours, and we would like to help you find the perfect match. […]

January 2, 2020

Do you have even a single romantic bone in your body? Well, if you’re not sure about just how sweet and thoughtful you can be to someone you love, that’s what this quiz is here to answer. 11 Quizzes For Nigerians Who Are Ready To Marry  Are you ready to marry? Take these quizzes.

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

More from Oldies

May 27, 2021

Children’s day, a day set apart for kids. Like they don’t win at life already? You’re not paying bills or rent and you have a day to celebrate yourself? Get me their manager, please. On days like this, we can’t help but remember how good we used to have it so we wrote this article […]

February 12, 2020

Forget Tunji and Daniella, if you’re wondering who your best friend is, it’s most definitely the phone you’re either reading this from or the phone that’s somewhere within your vision; we know this because you’re definitely a phone addict that gets a little impatient when you’re too far away from your phone. Okay, let’s not […]

February 8, 2020

Yes, Valentine’s Day is almost here. Love notes, chocolates, hampers, and everything that comes with it. But while everyone is being hit by cupid’s arrow, there are some people who don’t even feel the hype. If you’re one of them, then grab a seat at this table. 1. You, when you hear that Valentine is […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X