10 Glaring Signs Your I-Just-Got-Back Status Has Officially Expired

January 7, 2016

1. When they stop putting on the generator for you when they take light.

Get ready, they have already started pitying you less.

2. When they tell you to buy fuel by yourself if you want the gen on.

Ah! It has officially begun; your status is expiring

3. When no one has asked you “when did you get back?” in weeks.

Basically everyone that can see you has already seen you.

4. When you stop converting naira to dollars/pounds in your head.

You are starting to accept your fate.

5. When your parents go from “don’t stay out too late” to “be back by 10”.

The curfew has arrived.

6. When your parents go from asking you to help them do a chore to telling you to go do it.

Their eyes are starting to clear.

7. When the chores go from little ones like washing plates to washing toilet floor.

You know they are rating you less and less.

8. When you stop saying “innit” and “mate” as much.

By this time “ehen” and “my guy” have pushed them out.

9. When you haven’t complained about the heat in weeks.

You’re already getting used to it.

10. When you either queue for fuel for over an hour or argue with a conductor.

The moment any of these happen, your IJGB status has officially expired.

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