Nigerian Parents Will Never Spend Their Money on These 7 Items

January 29, 2022

Nigerian parents can sell everything they own to send us to school, but you see these seven items? They would rather jump into a lagoon than buy them.

1. Premium enjoyment

From the early days of hearing, “There’s rice at home to eat,” to, “Let me hold your money for you.,” it’s evident that Nigerian parents have made a covenant against using their money for premium enjoyment. Why?

2. Your happiness

Happiness to a Nigerian parent are the clothes on your back, roof over your  and food on the table. Any other thing is your business. Go and find money for it because they’re not paying for that dear. 

3. Therapy

They will never even admit that they need it in the first place, so spending their money on it is asking a bit much. The best you can do is secretly pay for a session and tell them it’s a prayer meeting. 

4. Data

Anything concerning data is too stressful and technical. They’ll guilt trip you into buying data for them only to end up rewarding you by spamming you with daily Whatsapp BCs. 

5. Chargers

A Nigerian parent will misplace their charger and never think of how to replace it. All they do is show up at the house, shout your name like a criminal and ask you to bring your own charger for them. That’s pretty much the end of owning a charger until you spend your money to get them another one.

6. Skin care products

A Nigerian mother will tell you how she can never waste her money on “those unnecessary  things” you rub on your face. Then watch her stroll into your room to casually to let her even see the “thing” that you are using sef. Next thing, she’s coming every morning to wash her face with the same products she insulted you for. Don’t even suggest it to her to buy it; just buy your own so you can have peace.

7. Phones

Are your parents even Nigerian if they haven’t told you, “A phone is only for texting and calling?” Any phone more than 20k is a taboo in the How to Be a Nigerian Parent handbook. Trust me, your parents aren’t Nigerians if they don’t remind you about how you just waste money on gadgets. But once you buy it for them, the family group chat will be on fire.

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

You'll like this

August 18, 2021

There seems to be something triggering about getting calls out of the blue. What transpires in the few seconds between seeing the call and deciding to pick up or not will no longer be a secret. Here are 9 of the most common things people say before you hear “hello”. You might have said some […]

November 19, 2019

If you grew up in a Yoruba home, you know for sure that your parents do not have exclusive parenting rights on you; there are other people, possessing a hold over you, especially how you behave and stuff. High up on this list are Yoruba aunties. We know you’re rising to that status too, so […]

Watch

Now on Zikoko

November 29, 2022

A member of Nigeria’s first family is trending on social media over the mistreatment of a young Nigerian over the past few days. The attention she’s got has come with various taunts, public outcries, and even different forms of body shaming against her and the Nigerian government.  The person in question is none other than […]

Recommended Quizzes

April 3, 2020

While the rest of the world loves to treat our continent like a country, there are actually 54 African countries. So, in a bid to test your knowledge (and educate you), we’ve created a quiz to see how many of their capitals you can correctly name. Go ahead:

October 29, 2019

We are going to be attempting to guess when you’ll marry based on your favourite Nigerian foods. What does your fave swallow have to do with when you’ll tie the knot? Please, don’t ask complicated questions. This quiz is rigorous and accurate (don’t quote us), so just take it already. QUIZ: Why Do You Have […]

October 30, 2019

Kemi Adetiba’s King of Boys movie got a lot of things right, especially casting, so yes, it was a monster hit. Now, we know you may not have put much thought to this, but the personalities of some of the characters closely match yours, and we would like to help you find the perfect match. […]

More from Inside Life

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

September 13, 2022
Vs The World is a Zikoko original video series that follows best friends Astor and Hassan as they take on the world.
August 23, 2022
Zikoko Ships is a Zikoko Original series where we invite two people who share a relationship to play the Zikoko card games
December 14, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
November 2, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
October 26, 2020
A collection of videos documenting some of the events of the EndSARS protests.
June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X