You call them friends, neighbours, even family. But they did not serve you Christmas food. Well, here’s how to treat their fuck-up:
1. Stop greeting them.
They don’t deserve it.
2. When they spread their clothes, leave it outside so rain can beat it.
Shebi they also let hunger beat you. It’s tit for tat.
3. If they are your social media friends, do not engage with their posts.
Look away. Their posts are kuku not interesting anyway.
4. In fact, unfriend, unfollow and block them.
Bye bye to jati jati.
5. Deflate the tires of their car.
Let us see which car they will drive to go and buy another set of ingredients.
6. Snatch their boyfriend/girlfriend.
Next time, they will not try rubbish with you.
7. Sneak into their bathroom and pour detergent in their bath water.
Scatter their plans.
8. Call police for them.
Let them spend two nights in detention, see if their head will not be correct by force.
Have you read this?
