7 Nigerian Men Tell Us Their Worst Experience With Alcohol

August 11, 2020

Everyone has their limits with alcohol. What happens what happens when you pass yours?

These Nigerian men tell us their worst experiences.

1. Michael, 21

Omo, me and my guys went to chill around Lekki Waterside. I left home on an empty stomach. Alcohol had never done anything to me so I was pretty chill. We mixed Henny and Orijn.

First glass, second glass, third glass.

I just realized that I couldn’t see well again. Next thing I started to throw up. I threw up on myself twice on that table and nobody knew. Then I just rested my head on the table. The waiter kept coming to ask if I was okay, and I would just give him a thumbs up.

I’m never touching alcohol again in my life. ‘

2. Dare, 23

I was super drunk in an Uber. The trip ended and I paid the guy. After a few moments (and I don’t know why I was still around him), he fully convinced me that I hadn’t paid him. I paid again.

Fuck that guy.

3. Uthman, 34

Some years ago before Uber, I went out one night, without any plans on how I would get back home. No car, just vibes. Thinking about it now, I’m glad I went with my guys because we all had to drunkenly walk quite some distance back home that night.

On the course of the trip, I tried to stop a bus that was already full by trying to hold it still as it drove past us. Everyone laughed.

The next day, and for the next two weeks, I couldn’t lift that arm. I’m so glad I didn’t break my arm.

4. Tega, 23

You know those skushies they sell? Those things are the devil, especially when they’re ice cold and sweet.

I’m a strong drinker normally, but a few cups of that thing one night and about three people had to fully carry me into my school hostel that night. You know how, in your dreams, you try to move but you can’t. That’s how it was. I could not move a muscle.

All I remember about the day after is walking into the hostel by 6pm. Till today, I cannot say what I spent the day doing. I hope I didn’t do anything terrible.

5. Dre, 25

After a series of unfortunate events in my life that left me depressed at 16, my uncle noticed and decided to take me out for my first drink, and have a heart to heart.

I went from telling him, “I don’t drink” to calling for more drinks myself from the waiter.

The night ended with me asking if I was the one who drank all those bottles of alcohol, and when he said yes, I started ranting about how I have now added alcoholism to my list of problems in life and I was just doomed for destruction anyways.

Man, depression is bad.

6. Dennis, 31

Lekki Epe expressway. Never drink and drive.

We’d just finished celebrating a friend who was about to travel. I’d had a whole lot to drink, by the time I was driving out I was already hitting curbs. My friends were saying stuff like “Dennis are you sure you can drive?” I was like “Guy fuck off. Do you know when I started driving?”

One hour later, I had totalled my vehicle. Mine and another’s. He was a Major General in the military. His wife was also some really important person. He was threatening to throw me in prison. LCC was suing me for damaging their roads. I was in so much trouble. By the time I’d gotten back to my car from checking theirs and trying to sort things out, my car had been emptied. I’d been robbed. Worst night of my life.

I had to tow the car away from there, and then later sell it as scraps to fix their car.

Never drink and drive.

7. Kenny, 22

Recently, I called my ex and told her I was ready to leave my current girlfriend and get back together with her.

It’s bad because my ex and I ended very badly and I hate her guts.

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David Odunlami

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