They say when you love a person, you’ll do just about anything to be with them. Some super-fans take this statement so literally, they’ll do just about anything to be with their faves.

I hate to have my point made with such insanity, but the perfect example happened this weekend. Some overzealous fans opened the grave of Ivorien singer, DJ Arafat hours after he was buried. Their excuse? They needed TO CONFIRM IT WAS REALLY HIM WHO WAS BURIED. Wtf guys! What the actual fuck? Who do you think they buried? 2Pac? Salomon Kalou?

Fortunately, as far as I know, Nigerian fans haven’t gone as far as exhuming bodies to confirm a celebrity’s identity. But trust Nigerians to package our fanaticism in style and years of persistent stalking.

Here are some instances where Nigerian fans took things a little too far:

  • When Tacha Got That Tattoo Of The DMW Logo

Long before Tacha became Port Harcourt’s anti-logic ‘first daughter’ on Big Brother Naija, she was @symplytacha, an Instagram slay queen who thought it was a good idea to get a tattoo of Davido’s daughter, Imade, just beneath her breasts. Whether the decision was to draw attention to the child or her cleavage, only Tacha knows.

I just can’t wait for Imade to grow up and meet Tacha (showing off her tattoo) at an event, thus creating the most awkward situation since they asked Eedris Abdulkareem to stand up at a Nigerian event because of 50 Cent.

  • Omowunmi Akinnifesi’s Stalker

Most beauty queens tend to deal with stalkers at some point or the other. But get this: Omowunmi Akinnifesi, the former Nigerian beauty queen who won MBGN in 2011, was stalked by the same guy for SIX YEARS. Online and offline. That’s enough time to get a degree and the two years experience that most graduates often need to get their first job. The whole episode began with a phone call and the regular ‘we need to be together’ rhetoric.

Despite her best efforts, it graduated to dozens of phone calls daily and later, unexplained visits to her workplace and church. According to Nigerian laws, stalking is a crime. Stalkers can get desperate and extremely dangerous (which is all we learned from “Obsessed”, one movie like that which had Beyonce in it). So Akinnifesi went public in 2012 and got a lasting solution to it. We don’t want to guess what that was.

  • That Time A Female Fan Tried To Rock Johnny Drille’s World By Force

Johnny Drille is Nigerian music’s poster kid for wholesome living and happy thoughts, which partly explains why he has a large share of female fans. While some are content watching him sing, others just want to have his babies, whether he likes it or not.

The story goes that, early in his career, Johnny was at a hotel when a fan knocked the door claiming to be room service, only to throw herself in his domain like a damsel in distress. Except this time, she wanted some good loving. In case you missed the memo, such behaviour has a name in the law; assault. The funny thing about this though; I can almost swear any random Nigerian singer would see this as an opportunity, the kind that only ends in Whatsapp chats, pregnancy tests and Instablog9ja.

  • This Nigerian Fan Who Scarred Herself For Life Because, Wizkid

When you love an artist whose fans are literally a small army, you may feel like you need to be extra to show your loyalty. We’re going to assume that’s why Diane, a young Wizkid superfan decided to get a ‘tattoo’ of the artist on her back.

The main problem here is that Diane probably didn’t think this through because the tattoo, which covers her entire back, looks like she slept off around a drunk eight-year-old with a tattoo gun. Diane has a lot of explaining to do to too many people: employers, her kids, Wizkid and God, to mention a few.

  • When Nigerian Football Fans Sent 1000 Death Threats To Kaita

Nigerians don’t play, not even when we’re playing football. Sani Kaita had to find this out the hard way after he showed up at the 2010 FIFA World Cup as a rugby player and spent his time hacking opponents down, until he got sent off in Nigeria 1-2 defeat to Greece.

Sani Kaita had started out as a bright product of the Nigerian youth team, but we don’t live in the past on this side. Nigerian fans were so pissed that in two days, Kaita received over 1000 death threats. He never played for the national team again.

(EXTRA) All the times Naira Marley’s fans have shown him love:

In case you missed it, the Marlians are a different breed. For one, they are fans of Naira Marley, a problematic singer and living question mark. Marlians show love for their fave in ways that would scare any other person into retirement.

They’ve blocked him in hordes in traffic and at public events. Female fans routinely tag him on social media posts where they dance in their birthday suits without prompt. And there’s that Soapy dance. To be a Marlian is to make a great sacrifice.

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