1. When they tell you to go and bring your slippers but disappear before you get back.
African leaders get us excited then jet out of the country at the last minute, very disappointing.
2. How your parents never tell you where exactly they’re going no matter how much you ask.
Same way, you’ll hear “President XYZ traveled on “diplomatic relations” but the purpose of those journeys are almost always unknown.
3. After flogging you mercilessly, they ask if you have eaten.
African leaders put their citizens through fuel scarcity, erratic supply of electricity but conveniently say they have the interests of their people in mind, “the people are wonderful people”, who wonder don epp?
4. Can you talk back at your parents, or rather do you want to die untimely?
You cannot criticize an African leader openly. Are you in doubt? Okay try yelling how you really feel about your president at a rally then come and tell us the outcome.
5. They help us “hold our money” like our darling African parents.
All the taxes they help us keep and ‘save’ or invest in the ‘safest’ places.
6. They hate how constant and active we are on social media.
“Always pressing your phone”. Ever heard of the Social Media bill? Well African leaders are irked by the constant use of social media by youths and don’t seem to understand the many advantages of using social media.
7. They tell us how ‘perfect’ they were in their younger days and how they never attended parties.
Meanwhile, most of the vices practiced today were passed down to us from them. *Sips tea*
8. When our parents say “Oya let us go” but still manage to keep you waiting for another hour…
African leaders are the beginning and end of wasting time. They’ll promise to build a road in 4 weeks, but only complete the project in nothing short of 6 years.
9. Remember how mummy and daddy promised to “think about it” when you proposed a brilliant idea to them?
Now, think of all the times our leaders said “We are looking into it”, “We will end fuel scarcity”, “All hands are on deck”, “We are working on a permanent solution”.
10. Our African leaders always tell us how broke the country is and how humble their personal bank accounts are.
But guess what? They manage to slay to every event, find that money to travel and host so many visitors.
Are we right or are we right?
There’s a new acting Chief Justice of Nigeria (CJN) in town but his rise to the throne was paved by alleged corruption, a leaked Supreme Court letter and a rare resignation. Here’s the tea.
If you ever feel like a child trapped in an adult body, tricked into adulthood. You should take this quiz that’ll prove if you’re more of a child or an adult.
While we know that a lot of the best Nigerian artists deservedly have fans across generations, that won’t stop us from attempting to guess how old you are based on your taste in Nigerian music. So, take this quiz to see if we got it right:
Are you an ajebutter or not? Well, if you’ve gone through life blissfully unaware of its harshness, then you probably are. Now, we want to know just how high you rank on that ajebutter scale, using your food preferences as a (very accurate) measure. Take to find out:
Are you a professional Yoruba demon? Are you walking around in search of whose life you can wreck at any given time? Well, this quiz knows exactly how many hearts you’ve shattered to date, and before you lie that your result is inaccurate, just remember that Zikoko is never wrong. Now, take it and be […]
Today, we are going to be using your taste in music to determine how good you actually are in bed. All you need to do is create the ultimate Nigerian hit — from the lead artist to the producer — and we’ll tell you if all your partners leave satisfied, or if you are just […]
Did your parents give you enough beans when you were growing up? If they did, then you’re probably around 6’0″ and above. Either way, we created a quiz that can guess your current height (pretty accurately, if we do say so ourselves). Take to see if we nailed it:
Children’s day, a day set apart for kids. Like they don’t win at life already? You’re not paying bills or rent and you have a day to celebrate yourself? Get me their manager, please. On days like this, we can’t help but remember how good we used to have it so we wrote this article […]
Are you a Nigerian Student? Are you in a relationship with a fellow Nigerian student? If your answer to these questions is “yes”, then definitely understand these struggles stated below The roommate that does not understand privacy You have been telling Cynthia about how bae is coming over for some private time since the beginning […]
Phillipine movies usually follow a pattern that has become obvious and annoying. Consider this list a documentation of that annoyance by once loyal fans.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
Z! Stacks
Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
If you ever feel like a child trapped in an adult body, tricked into adulthood. You should take this quiz that’ll prove if you’re more of a child or an adult.
If you were born to Nigerian parents in Nigeria, chances are, you got ass-whopped a fair amount of times. And you see, Nigerian parents use different items to spank their kids. Take this quiz and we’ll guess which one was mostly used to spank you as a child.
It can be confusing to know what your partner likes when it comes to sex, especially when they’re not very communicative. Have you ever wondered whether your partner secretly likes spanking? Take this quiz and find out.
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