We like to talk about how stressful living with our Nigerian parents was. But we don’t really talk about the times we were completely mischievous. Anyone who grew up in Nigerian is only too familiar with the following tricks:
Lying to your teacher that you forgot your assignment at home when you didn’t even attempt to do it
Assignments are for losers
Faking illness so you get to be pampered
I’m done with all these chores
When they send you to buy fuel and you keep part of the money back
Man must gain something.
Blaming a sibling for something was clearly your fault
Sorry, the game is the game
Hiding the TV remote to force your siblings to watch what you want to watch
This is the way it’s supposed to be.
Asking your parents for money to buy a nonexistent textbook
This is for all the money you collected from me and didn’t return
