1. When you find money you’d forgotten about in one of your trouser pockets.
2. When the cashier tells you they don’t have change like they expect you to leave it.
Better give me my N20 before it turns to fight.
3. When the bus your normally enter for N100 calls N150 for you.
That what happened?
4. When your friends invite you to hangout.
The Lie: “I’m busy, maybe some other time.”
5. When you go out with your friends and have to pretend you’re not hungry.
The Other Lie: “No, I’ve already eaten.”
6. When you hear the price of something and pretend like you’re still thinking of buying it.
“I actually like it, but do you have it in bluish magenta?”
7. When you start remembering all the onigbeses you’d already forgotten.
I gave Tunde N500 that year oh.
8. When you get that “100 MB Remaining” data message.
What is this life?
9. How you check your balance at the ATM:
Mind your business, abeg.
10. When you finally see your account balance after avoiding it.
God forbid! This cannot be my own balance.
11. When you start thinking about all the useless things you bought when you had money.
Did I really need to buy KFC last month?
12. When you want to treat yourself.
Well, that’s a NO!
13. When a friend suggests you guys take a cab somewhere.
Have buses finished?
14. When it’s a new month and salary has still not entered.
You people should not play with me.
15. When that rich relative comes around.
16. When you stop yourself from wasting money you barely even have.
Better borrow sense.
17. When you finally get a credit alert.
FINALLY!!! Time to go and buy more rubbish.