Big boob problems are real. We’ve even written about its many woes before. What we didn’t realize is there’s a whole spectrum of struggles. And as the cup size increases the struggles get harder.
This week we talked to a woman who has been full busted almost all of her life and is absolutely sick of it.
My first bra was a red D-cup made by one of those obscure Chinese brands so of course, the hold was trash. I was 11 and anytime I tell someone I was wearing a D-cup when I was 11 they never believe. I started developing when I was like 9 but my mum was in denial. I was a 10-year-old with probably B or C-cup breasts still wearing bra tops under her uniform. My breasts used to spill out all the time, and you could tell through my uniform that it was exposed. It was the most embarrassing thing. So I started wearing cardigans to school come rain or shine, to cover them up properly.
Did it give you any trouble in school?
Oh man, I got teased a whole lot. Guys will find excuses to brush up against me and my breasts. And I was very non-confrontational so I won’t say anything. Then the rumours started going around that I was a slut who was letting all the guys in school touch her breast. I ended up transferring out of the school to an all-girls school in JSS2. Not necessarily because of this but I was so relieved to go.
Being busty in an all-girls school was way less stressful. You just got tagged with it, but not in a derogatory way. Like if your name is Anu and there are 6 Anus on your corridor, you just got called ‘Busty Anu’.
I remember one time in SS2, I was up to an E cup by then. We weren’t supposed to have phones in school and they announced a surprise search. I hid like three phones in my bra and they didn’t find them even after patting me down. Everyone else who tried to do the same got caught. Lol everyone told this story over and over again till we graduated. People will make jokes about hiding house in my breast.
What about at home?
My mum acted like being busty was some sort of plague I had brought upon myself. She had never really policed what I wore, but once she got me that first bra she turned into a brigader. I was like a size 10 and she was buying me size 14 clothes just to hide my breasts. I used to alter my uniforms to fit when I got to school but at home, I had to wear sack clothes everywhere.
I never felt self-conscious about being busty in school but once I got home it felt like something I was supposed to be ashamed of. One day my mum had a friend and her husband over and I came down to get something from the kitchen without a bra on. She got so angry, told me to never try it again, especially when there was a man in the house. I started sleeping with my bra on after that.
Biggest struggle then?
Buying bras that fit. My mum was a C cup after having 3 kids and here she was with a DD, then E, then F cup daughter. Here’s the thing about bras. As the cup size goes up, manufacturers work under the assumption that the person’s size is also going up. So you’d find many F-cup bras perfect for people who are like a size 14 or 16, but not many for someone who is a size 10.
One time my mum got someone to sew bras for me. Sis was tired. They were so ugly I burned them. It wasn’t enough to throw them away.
When I was 15 I think I had only one bra that fit properly. I wore that bra until the underwire started to injure me, and kept wearing it even after that.
Current bra size?
I’m currently at a ridiculous size G. Sometimes, in fact a lot of times a H is more comfortable but I refuse to accept that I’m a size H.
Biggest struggle now?
Finding clothes that fucking fit. I’m still not a very big person. I wear a size 10/12. But when I buy shirts I have to buy size 16 and have it altered to at least fit the rest of my torso. I also don’t have a very large ass, so when I stand to the side, I look like a capital letter P. I hate it.
What about unwarranted attention?
Nigerian men are disgusting animals and they are very lucky guns aren’t allowed in this country. If I had a penny for every snide or lewd comment, every time someone touched my breast by ‘mistake’ and even brazenly sef, I’d be Bill Gates.
Some women can mean too. I ‘ve gotten my fair share of ‘what the hell is on this ones chest’ looks. I’ve had a supervisor at work walk up to me and tell me I needed to do something about my breasts. When I asked her what exactly she meant she started stuttering.
But of course. I can’t wear any sort of tube tops or dresses, I look absolutely ridiculous. I also try to avoid shirts because the buttons tend to pop at the most inconvenient times. Like when you are giving a presentation at work. True story.
Where do you get your bras now?
I buy on Amazon, which is a surprisingly great place to buy bras. There are tons of options. Asos also has a great selection of fuller bust bras. I almost never get my band size, but I’ve taken to slim-fitting my bras and that just makes my life so much easier now. That doesn’t reduce the cost sha. Have you ever had to save to buy a new collection of bras? I have. I can’t just wake up and decide to buy 6 new bras, I have to plan for it.
The most expensive bra you’ve ever bought?
$63 on a Cacique bra. Ugly ass thing too, but the fit and hold are marvellous. I’ve had it for about a year now.
Would you like them smaller?
All the lamenting I’ve been doing since morning what do you think? I know exactly how much it’s going to cost me to get a breast reduction surgery – $6000. I’m also actively saving towards it. Once I hit my goal, I’m going to empty out my account and head straight to the doctor’s. But I don’t think I want to risk doing it here. I don’t want to wake up from surgery and have one B cup and one C cup. With one facing North and the other South. Thank God for blue passport, once I’m ready I’ll do it in Yankee.
What would your ideal size be?
Nice perky C-cups. I can’t wait, I even have a picture picked out.