If you thought being a single man in Nigeria was fun, el. oh. el!

All of us are suffering this thing together.

Imagine, somebody is still managing their life and family is already asking you to marry.

Na wah o. Didn’t I finish school just nine years ago?

Your landlord’s wife will call every girl that comes to your house. “Our wife. Welcome o.”

I don’t blame you. It’s my fault that I have six sisters.

If you want to chill with your guys and go with a female friend, wahala. They will tease you to tears.

Please stop talking. Don’t make things awkward. She’s like my sister na! Oh God, why is she giving me this kind of side eye?

And when they see you with another female friend, they will start asking about ‘that your former babe’.

If it were that easy to pull babes, shey I won’t have girlfriend by now? Mumu.

Even your parents will betray you and start asking for their grandchildren.

Wey I never even get babe. Abeg wait small.

When even your ‘irresponsible’ friend gets married, your family will just be looking at you like

See me see trouble o!

Even your married friends that should understand your situation will be telling you to go and marry.

If not that you found somebody to manage you now…

Toasting babes will be giving you high blood pressure.

“She’s fine o. She probably has a boyfriend, though. What if she should give me L? Do I look alright? Chai, this my shirt don fade. I should have sprayed that perfume. Cheesus!”

At one point, you won’t even have your guys to chill wilth again because they’ll all have babes.

All of a sudden, you’ll know the difference between alone and lonely.

When you get to a certain age and you’re still not married, people will start wondering and asking what is wrong with you.

Na wah o. It’s like this my life, we are all sharing it abi?

My brother, if you let people give you heart attack for singleness that is not their own, well… Issalova Jackie.

Just take it easy and enjoy your life before you make a huge mistake!


Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.