Nigerian tailors have been disappointing us since time immemorial. If their sewing machine isn’t bad, their mother is sick or they stole their gen and that’s why your cloth is not ready. If you are tired of Nigerian tailors’ wahala, then this one is for you.

If you need the cloth in two months tell them you need it in two weeks.

By the time you really need your clothes, they’ll be ready.

Always remember that every word that comes out of their mouth is a lie.

If they tell you, you need ten yards that means you need eight.

If they start asking too many questions about the style you want to make that means they can’t sew it. Leave.

No matter how many times they tell you ‘yes ma I can sew it’.

Never use a tailor without a shop or who’s squatting in someone’s shop.

The day you drop your material and a deposit is the last day you’ll see them.

If you are using the tailor for the first time, give them cheap ankara that someone dashed you.

Don’t give them that lace that you bought for 50k. If not your case will be one of had I known.

Don’t give them any breathing space. Sit on their heads.

Call them morning, afternoon and night. If their shop isn’t far pop in every now and then until your cloth is ready.

Don’t collect your cloth on the day you need it.

If it’s not too big, it’ll be too small. Or the jumpsuit you asked for might have turned to gown.

If you need something sewn quickly keep it very simple.

If you give a Nigerian tailor three days to sew agbada with embroidery you won’t like what you’ll collect.

Never ever pay in full, don’t even pay half.

If you do, whatever state your cloth was in when you paid is how it’ll stay until you call police.

If you check in on your tailor and they haven’t even cut your material collect it back and flee.

4 months from now you’ll still be begging for the cloth.

If they disappoint you and break your heart once, treat them like a bad ex and never go back.

What are you still doing with that tailor that didn’t let you wear the asoebi you bought to that wedding? Remember the pain of the small chops tray passing you by because you didn’t wear asoebi? Good hold on to that vex.

Show them no mercy.

If they tell you their mother is sick, they are lying. They got robbed? Lying. Hold their neck and collect your cloth.

Finally, always be wary.

That tailor that hasn’t disappointed you in ten years will do so one day. It’s not their fault it’s just their nature.


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