Last night was the Nigerian premiere of the Barbie movie, and if there’s one thing Nigerian celebrities like, it’s a themed event.
So, make way for the Barbies and Kens of Nigeria, from the ones who ate their looks up like hot jollof rice on a Sunday afternoon, to the ones that should’ve neatly folded their clothes and left them at the back of their wardrobe.
Tomike looked like she just stepped out the plastic casing of a My Western Barbie. She really gave that one student that’ll be playing while everyone else is reading and still end up at the top of the class.
Barbiemetre: This Barbie ate and left no crumbs. 10/10
Hilda decided to give us princess Barbie, and came through with it. While everyone else were hell bent on serving variations of Barbie that would shock Barbie herself to the core, Hilda and her train swept everyone away in this classic Barbie look.
Barbiemetre: 9/10. She looks like an angel in this.
If baddie Barbie and corporate Barbie had a child together, it would look like this. From her hair to her clothes and purse, you can tell she came ready to serve effortlessly. Not in a “you must collect” way but in a “you don’t have a choice but to take it” way.
He came, he ate, he slayed. The entire outfit is cute because it’s Ken. It doesn’t look like he thought about it too long or too hard. He just looks free and comfortable, and that’s really what Barbie is about.
This Barbie is a baddie. She didn’t do too much or try too hard, and it’s really giving peak Lagos Barbie.
The fit could’ve given retro Ken if that hat didn’t look like the one Osuofia wore while he was roaming London.
I understand their look was inspired by an actual Barbie, but something about the way it all came together looked a complete mess.
Barbiemetre: Barbie gave them expo, but they said, “Not today”. 5/10
I appreciate that her team did a little research, but if this was an exam, she’d be the ITK that still got a C because they didn’t read the instructions. The look was inspired by a doll alright, just not a Barbie doll.
Barbiemetre: Her team did a little research, so A for effort. But it didn’t turn out as they planned, so F for 5/10.
This dress looks like it started off good. The tailor had a vision to make Kiekie into a Barbie warrior knight, then half way through, they decided to switch to princess. And now, we have what we have.
Iif he was going to his end-of-the-year high school party, then he would’ve been the best dressed. But this is Barbie’s day, and instead of looking like a good nice Ken, he looked like he missed road to another event.
After staring at this outfit for a good 30 minutes, I’ve finally realised the wisdom in it. She came dressed as all the balloons your parents blew up for your seventh Barbie birthday party. Innovative, but please, let’s save all this for the AMVCAs, so we’ll actually be prepared for it.
Barbiemetre: A strong 3/10 because I’ve just realised she has no shoes on.
It’s giving Barbie fairytopia, except Salem is not Barbie. She’s one of the villains Barbie’s fighting against.
Barbiemetre: 2/10. We don’t stan Barbie’s haters here.