Most interview questions are unnecessary, but this five-year-plan question is the worst of all. How do you even answer it? Do you lie and say you’d still be in their company while you scream “God forbid” in your mind? Do you say you don’t know?

Worry no more. We’ve got the perfect answers to this question.

“I live in the moment”

They’ll know you don’t bother yourself about things you can’t predict. You focus on solving problems here and now; isn’t that what employers want?

“Only God knows the future”

But honestly, how do they expect you to know? Just tell them you don’t know because you’re not God. Believe me, that’s a plus for honesty.

“Do you people want to fire me before then?”

They should already know you’ll likely still be in their company in five years, unless they already have plans to sack you. 

“Five years older”

That’s the obvious answer, but they won’t expect anyone to say this, so you’ll get points for thinking outside the box.

“In a senior position earning a higher salary”

The best thing about this answer is, you aren’t promising to sit down in their company. If they offer you a higher salary, great. If not, you find your level.

“In your seat”

Old-fashioned, but might still work for some Nigerian bosses. It’ll show you’re really ambitious and goal-oriented — words recruiters just love to hear. There’s a small chance they’ll get pissed, but what’s life without a little risk?

“In [insert foreign country]”

So they don’t get blindsided when you eventually japa to the country of your dreams. If they act surprised, ask them, “Be honest. Don’t you also want to japa?” They’ll stop talking and quietly offer you the job.

“Alive and well”

Because living in Nigeria is an extreme sport, still having air in your lungs in five years is a legit accomplishment. Every employer would relate to this.

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