In some parts of our beloved Nigeria, armed robbery is rampant and we are not always well-equipped with the tools we need to protect ourselves.

So here are all the things every Nigerian needs in their car or home to protect themselves from these bloody ‘ahm robbers’:

1. German shepherd

Every Nigerian knows that the go-to guard dogs are German shepherds.

2. Homemade pepper spray (Atarodo spray)

Just make your own using the recipe HERE.

3. Baygon, Mobil or Raid

If you don’t have time to grind atarodo to make a homemade pepper spray, insecticide will do.

4. Prayer and a machete

Kill them or they kill you.

5. Prayer and catapult

To catapult them out of your home real quick.

6. Holy water or anointing oil

Honestly, there’s a spirit operating behind armed robbery. Holy water or anointing oil are probably the most effective of the weapons.

7. Eba stick

This is the most easily accessible. Can be found in every kitchen in the Nigerian home.

8. Koboko

The thief won’t even see it coming.

9. A bouncer

Why? To take the bullet for you. This only works if you can afford it.

10. Taser and tear gas that don’t look like taser and tear gas

If you're interested in getting a taser and/or tear gas, holla.

They go for N15k and N5k. pic.twitter.com/x6K4EDrArn

— Slay King (@dodoshyne) November 6, 2015

The perfect camouflage.The robbers won’t even know what hit them.

11. Bullet-proof Nokia phone

Nokia is the very cheap alternative to the real bullet-proof vest and is said to be even more effective. Just put them where your vital organs are located.

Now, go forth and implement these. Protect yourself.