Mama Taraba’s pettiness reminds us of these Nigerian politicians

October 19, 2018

Nigerian Politics is the gift that just keeps giving. Just when you thought Dino Melaye had proved himself worthy of his skits and questionable dress sense, Aisha Jummai Al-Hassan, known to most as Mama Taraba, showed up this week to serve us with real petty goals.

For those who don’t know her, Mrs Alhassan first came to the spotlight when she lost the race to be governor of Taraba State to Darius Ishiaku of the PDP. For her troubles, she was made Minister of Women Affairs in 2015. Here’s where it gets interesting.

This year. The APC screened her out of the race for the governorship ticket. So our mother in pettiness left the party. Fair enough right? Except on Thursday, her ‘boys’ showed up at the APC secretariat to relieve them of all the things she had donated to the party.

Mama Taraba UDP
She packed it all, people of God. From computers and office furniture to rugs and air conditioners.

If I move, my property moves – Mama Taraba

Mama Taraba
Imagine it. One minute, you’re sitting in your new office, the next, someone asks you to stand up because the owner wants to collect her chair and table back.

Hate it or love it, Mama Taraba has set a new standard in showing people you’re actually in charge. Which reminds of us of a few circumstances where we’ve seen these before.

These are the classes of Nigerian politicians Mama Taraba reminds us of.

Those people who want to see how low you can go because they’re already lower.

One day, Dino Melaye will release a full mixtape with Vic-O as his campaign material, just so you know it’s real.

Those people who are sure you can’t create as much trouble as them

Peter Fayose
Fayose is what pettiness would be if it came from Ekiti, enjoyed frying akara with market women and had ambitions to become a DJ and President at the same damn time.

The class of politicians who will do anything to see their dreams come true

Atiku
Some of these people have changed parties more times than we’ve eaten in the last three days. But who’s counting right?

Then there are the godfathers that will promote their nephew to firstborn because the first son is misbehaving.

Bola Tinubu
Flogging a bad child, according to Jagaban.

Those people who will bring out your black file the moment you stop being friends

You can go from being the saviour of the world to being a complete nuisance in two days.

Did we leave anyone out? If there are other petty icons, let us know in the comments.

You'll like this

January 8, 2020

All your life you have struggled with saving money and being financially independent? Every year, you make resolutions to improve but you give up midway and revert to your old ways. If this sounds like you worry no more, we have four not so difficult steps to guide you on the road to monetary freedom. […]

Segun Akande

Join The Conversation

Bring a friend.

Watch

Now on Zikoko

July 12, 2020

Igbo Nigerians like to do things the “Igbo way”. It’s like sometime way back Igbo people held a meeting and made a checklist for being Igbo. So asides the obvious tradition being upheld there is also a culture that comes with being Igbo. Here are 5 things every Igbo Nigerian has done, will do, or […]

zikoko - open marriages
July 11, 2020

Since the love triangle between Will Smith, Jada Pinkett Smith and August Alsina became public knowledge a lot of Nigerians suddenly remembered that open marriages are a thing and are taking to Twitter to air their opinions. 1. Inside life. 2. Bringing a bazooka to small play. 3. We moved on brah. 4. Someone needs chill pills. […]

July 11, 2020

In this day and age, it’s near impossible to live without some form of technology. You need a phone, or a laptop, or at least an iPad fam. How else will you get to read Zikoko’s gists? Granted, owning a device comes with loads of perks but there are also some annoying things attached like; […]

Recommended Quizzes

November 25, 2019

We already guessed how many people you’ve slept with, and y’all were out here denying the truth. Anyway, we won’t hold that against you. This time, however, we’ve created a quiz that predicts who you’ll sleep with next — so you can either prepare or try (unsuccessfully) to prevent it. So, take and see:

November 19, 2019

Regardless of what society has tried to tell us, enjoying sex is not something to be ashamed of. So, in a bid to celebrate our generation’s sexual agency, we’ve created a quiz that will accurately (again, keep your complaints to yourself) infer how many people you’ve spelt with. Try it out: Only People With Nigerian […]

November 22, 2019

It can be very stressful when you’re trying to find the love of your life, but you only keep meeting people that are exactly like your yeye ex. To help you be more aware of that problem, we’ve created a quiz that lets you know the kind of people you are attracting. Take it to […]

November 28, 2019

There are so many talented and stunning Nollywood actors that make it hard not to fall in love with them. So, while we all know the likelihood of us ending up with any of them is super low, it’s still fun to imagine a world where we actually stood a chance, and that’s why this […]

More from General

June 15, 2020

Schools are pretty much all about lectures, tests, exams, and assignments. Of course, students have a love-hate (mostly) relationships with all of them. Let’s talk about assignments, we will come to the others later. When students have to deal with a new assignment, their thoughts go something like this: 1. This lecturer own is too […]

May 29, 2020

You know, for people who have the hardest time permitting their children to attend sleepovers, inter-state excursions and any program not designed for the church or mosque, Nigerian parents are awfully trusting when their children decide an education abroad is what they want to spend a few years of their lives pursuing. And when it […]

April 24, 2020

The rise of new Nollywood has brought with it a host of exciting new stars like Adesua Etomi, Enyinna Nwigwe and many more. However, one star who never seems to get the due they deserve is the Lekki-Ikoyi bridge. Vey few Nollywood performers are as relentless and as hard-working as the bridge, who, without any […]

April 21, 2020

They say you can’t miss what you never had. (Un) Fortunately for us single pringles, while everyone is collectively worrying about issues like oil prices, practising safe social distancing and lockdown etiquette, we’re excused from worrying about another matter. One of the heart — being apart from your significant other while the coronavirus is contained. […]

April 1, 2020

Brymo — “Strippers + White Lines” Brymo, one of Nigeria’s most acclaimed singer-songwriters, just released his seventh studio album, Yellow, and “Strippers + White Lines” is its astounding lead single. On the Mikkyme Joses-produced track, Brymo sings about his struggles with depression, his unhealthy coping mechanisms and fighting to find the light amidst all the […]

Watch

Trending Videos

Zikoko Originals

June 22, 2020
'The Couch' is a Zikoko series featuring real life stories from anonymous people.
June 22, 2020
Hacked is an interesting new series by Zikoko made up of fictional but hilarious chat conversations.
June 4, 2020
What happens when a group of chatty young Nigerians talk about things they're passionate about? You get Nigerians talk. A show that discusses very familiar struggles for the average Nigerian. From relationship deal breakers to sex education with Nigerian parents to leaving Nigeria, be prepared for a ride.
June 2, 2020
Quickie is a video series where everyone featured gets only one minute to rant, review or do absolutely anything.
May 14, 2020
Isolation Diary is a Zikoko series that showcases what isolation is like for one young Nigerian working from home due to the Coronavirus pandemic.
March 12, 2020
Life is already hard. Deciding where to eat and get the best lifestyle experiences, isn't something you should stress about. Let VRSUS do that for you.
February 6, 2020
Who doesn't want to find love? In our bid to help, we paired up a bunch of single Nigerians, sending them on an all-expense paid date, and interviewing them before and after they met.
January 27, 2020
Nigerians Talk is what happened when a motley crew of young Nigerians were put in front of a camera and asked a bunch of apparently random questions about life, love, money and more.
September 24, 2019
A group of Zikoko staff go on a road trip to every mainland country in ECOWAS West Africa

Z! Stacks

Here's a rabbit hole of stories to lose yourself in:

Zikoko amplifies African youth culture by curating and creating smart and joyful content for young Africans and the world.
X