Welcome to adulting 101, you should be jotting down these points:

1) Share something cool you learnt about Nigerian history with them.

2) Complain about children of nowadays not receiving the kind of discipline you did.

Kids these days.

3) Talk about starting your own business.

…because salary is the bribe they give you to forget your dreams.

4) Tell them you prefer the music from their time over pangolo music these days.

5) Explain the many merits of eating at home instead of going out.

There’s really rice at home.

6) Mention something about politics.

We have enough politicians clowns to get source materials from.

7) Bring up the back pain.

To be honest, there’s no real adult that doesn’t have back pain. Or any kind of pain for that matter.

8) Follow up by talking about work lethargy.

Especially on Monday mornings!

9) Lastly, tell them you are thinking of marriage.

Bingo!

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